The House of Stone...

[SilverStoneFemme]

Originally Posted by Electrocell

Have to say your meaning of a stone butch pretty well sums it up for me. I don't like being touched in a feminizing way and I always make sure my partner is satisfied sexually before I consider my own needs. It gives me pleasure to give her pleasure.

And we stonefemmes get that, Electrocell.....matter of fact, most stonefemmes have our own set of sexual boundaries and limitations on what sexual activites we will do to our stonebutches.

There are things i won't do, sexually, on an every day basis. Occasionally, ok. But all the time? Nope. That's that lesbian sex and i'm not a lesbian. i'm a queer stonefemme...........

[SilverStoneFemme]

i'm so sorry it took me so long to get to the thread today. i had a dental appt and as i'm getting my work done at the local University dental school it takes waaaay longer than in a dentist's office.

However, i'm paying a whole lot less that i would to a dentist in practice. And the work is pretty much the same quality. All the work is supervised by the instructors, and the 2 crowns i'm getting have most of the work done on the inside. It's the lab who creates the crowns who is responsible for the quality.

It's all good, but my jaw is a bit on the sore side.........

[SilverStoneFemme]

i'm gonna tgo take two tylenol and see y'all tomorrow. i hope everyone has a good Friday..........

[SilverStoneFemme]

One last thing.......thanks to all who sent me Thanks and Reps. i totally appreciate it.........big hugs to all......

OK, i'm off to get this jaw some relief......

[*Anya*]

Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme

You have the heart of a stonefemme even if you're also able to do that lesbian thing......lol.....*shutter*.....sorry, even thinking of that makes me shiver.....can't help it, i'm a hard core stonefemme............

Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme

There are things i won't do, sexually, on an every day basis. Occasionally, ok. But all the time? Nope. That's that lesbian sex and i'm not a lesbian. i'm a queer stonefemme...........

These two posts have more than a hint of distaste.

TOS for the site stresses tolerance for all identies.

You can be true to your own identity without making negative comments about "that lesbian thing" and "that's lesbian sex" that makes you shudder "shutter" per your post.

Comments like that really bother me.

[aishah]

thanks, anya.

for my partner and i...our boundaries around sex shift and for us stone is deeply tied to our emotions as well. i respect that other people define and experience stone differently, and i love being a queer stone femme.

but we do have many lesbian id'ed folks on the planet, including lesbian stone femmes. and people who like all different kinds of sex acts. there's nothing wrong with not liking them...but showing disgust towards other folks' ids and sex acts is not okay, imho.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme

Hi, Silverseastar, nice to have you join us here.

As far as being a stonefemme, as long as you have respect for a butch's sexual boundaries and limitations that's all that matters. You have the heart of a stonefemme even if you're also able to do that lesbian thing......lol.....*shutter*.....sorry, even thinking of that makes me shiver.....can't help it, i'm a hard core stonefemme............

I get we all have our preferences but it's totally uncool to refer to lesbian sex and shutter like there's something wrong with that kind of sex.

Totally uncool!

[princessbelle]

SilverStoneFemme,

I know this is being addressed....but.

Not only are there lesbian stone femmes here, there are lesbian stone butches here as well. I happened to be partnered with one. Not all lesbians have sex the same way. We are quite diverse.

Not your keeper, just trying to offer a little friendly advice...

There are more flavors of IDs here than Baskin Robbins has flavors of ice creme.

[Electrocell]

How many flavors is that lol? HMmmmmmmmmm baskin robbins sounds good about now.

Originally Posted by princessbelle

SilverStoneFemme,

I know this is being addressed....but.

Not only are there lesbian stone femmes here, there are lesbian stone butches here as well. I happened to be partnered with one. Not all lesbians have sex the same way. We are quite diverse.

Not your keeper, just trying to offer a little friendly advice...

There are more flavors of IDs here than Baskin Robbins has flavors of ice creme.

[CherylNYC]

Originally Posted by princessbelle

SilverStoneFemme,

I know this is being addressed....but.

Not only are there lesbian stone femmes here, there are lesbian stone butches here as well. I happened to be partnered with one. Not all lesbians have sex the same way. We are quite diverse.

Not your keeper, just trying to offer a little friendly advice...

There are more flavors of IDs here than Baskin Robbins has flavors of ice creme.

Yup. I are one. Lesbian stonefemme here. I think I may be one of the rarest flavours.

[Jess]

I can not speak for any other stone butch out there, just myself. I would never pretend to try to define a label much less put such limitations on it as the OP has done here. After as many years in this community as I have been around, I can very easily point to the number of times someones ass gets handed to them for even considering doing that, just as I can count the number of times I have seen these definitions/ labels change from user to user.

I am, by my understanding of the labels/ definitions used historically in this community... a stone butch . I am a human being whose energy whom resides in a female body. I fuck feminine women. I do not get penetrated nor do I allow my body or the touching of it, to be done in a feminizing manner. While I am more comfortable being called by male pronouns , as for me, that reads "on line" that whomever I am speaking to feels that energy... I know that in this world ( my world I live in 24/7) I am seen as a woman as many times as I am seen as male/ masculine. I don't feel exactly comfortable with the OP only using "hy" when describing stone butch, as I know some stone butches whom prefer "she".

As far as "lesbian" goes. THIS stone butch entity is still living in a woman's body and fucks women. I am quite sure as long as I will remain alive, there are at least four dictionaries that will define women who fuck women as ( drum roll, wait for it...) Lesbian.

The pretty groovy ( and sometimes confusing) part of being part of a "queer" community, is that we are allowed and encouraged to define or label.. or NOT, ourselves. We are encouraged to NOT fall into the definitions placed on us by the majority of society that has held rule over our bodies ( and to some degree: minds) for evah! The other pretty groovy thing, is that we can and will look at one another and say, YOU, dear community member, do not get to define that for me either.

In the original opening post, we were asked to only take part in this thread if we fell into the definition of "stone" that was presented by the original poster.
Had it not continued on to add the tasteless comments regarding "lesbians", I may have fallen into that definition. Since it did "go there", I... suppose... I , as a stone, butch, freaky sex lovin, kinky whip wielding, non patchouli smellin, boot wearin, hat tippin, door openin, worshiper of high femmes ( NOT high maint, mind you) do not belong here and will respect that in the future.

[girl_dee]

2 definitions? really? i really have issues with people who tell people they can't be part of the group if they don't fit, what threads they can be part of and if they don't fit in, to go somewhere else. There are a bajillion ways to slice what we all are here and excluding people who may have something to offer does not feel right to me.


Another thing,

The word "feminize"

feminize |ˈfeməˌnīz|
verb [ trans. ]

• make (something) more characteristic of or associated with women : as office roles changed, clerical work was increasingly feminized.
• induce female sexual characteristics in a male.

This is SO reminiscent of the *melting the stone* thread on one of the other sites. As far as my opinion goes, being a non group member (i will never conform to labels/definitions) i don't get how anyone can *feminize* you no matter HOW they touch, talk or look at you without your permission. No one could ever *masculinize* me no matter how they fucked me. i appreciate that people have boundaries and we all do, and we love those who do, but the word feminize feels like something bad to me when used along these lines.

IMO butch is butch, femme is femme no matter what we are doing. No one loses their butch/femme card because of a sex act in my book. My book is not anyone else's book i respect that.

Carry on with your *group* !

[spritzerJ]

Oh what an interesting direction this thread has taken. I do hope we can remain open as a community ending up with a comfortable stone place to chat. And I imagine if we don't, no worries, there are lots of places to chat on this planet. I appreciate the variance in the community here. It is a treasure.

As for myself, I am sitting here going ooh another stone thread yippee! Because I wanted one. My own journey discovering, exploring and wondering about what my sexual expression "home" is leading me this way. And I am a reader I do like reading about stone (butch and femme) looking for a clue on the just right words for my feelings. Haven't quiet found those words yet.

I am thankful for the stone's who still claim lesbian as part of them. I guess I think of lesbian much like my maiden name. It is so much a part of me, my past, present and family of origin I don't want to give it up just to move into a new commitment with myself.

[morningstar55]

morning stoners
its a somewhat cool , cloudy morning here in Taylor Mi...
wish i was home.
there's a gay bingo event happening there tonight..... thats calling my name. lol

ok this is my 1st time viewing the house of stone.. i do recall this thread on another site.
annnnd seems like there are some interesting things to read and catch up on.
mean time....... have a great weekend everyone.

[Electrocell]

As far as feminizing to me it means I don't like to be touched in my genital area or have anything inserted in me or my breast touched this is my preference because I was molested as a child. Just as some women don't go for going down on a woman or inserting her fingers in a woman that is their preference. I maybe wrong but I think the latter is what SilverStoneFemme was refering to as lesbian sex. It might not be politically correct term to use but some of us may not be as gifted with words as others. What people do in their bedroooms or wherever,with whomever is their business.

[*Anya*]

Originally Posted by *Anya*

These two posts have more than a hint of distaste.

TOS for the site stresses tolerance for all identies.

You can be true to your own identity without making negative comments about "that lesbian thing" and "that's lesbian sex" that makes you shudder "shutter" per your post.

Comments like that really bother me.

Originally Posted by Electrocell

As far as feminizing to me it means I don't like to be touched in my genital area or have anything inserted in me or my breast touched this is my preference because I was molested as a child. Just as some women don't go for going down on a woman or inserting her fingers in a woman that is their preference. I maybe wrong but I think the latter is what SilverStoneFemme was refering to as lesbian sex. It might not be politically correct term to use but some of us may not be as gifted with words as others. What people do in their bedroooms or wherever,with whomever is their business.

Electrocell, my point was exactly that. We can be tolerant of each other, have our own sexual boundaries and preferences without any need to make comments such as "shiver", "shudder", put down "that lesbian sex thing" or make snide comments about how another identity chooses to express their sexuality.

That is strictly where other posters and I were coming from.

My ex, with whom I lived with for 19 years was strictly a stone butch for the first 10 years of our relationship. No, I did not try to change her but always honored her boundaries. That they shifted a tiny bit after 10 years, was her idea and choice on very, very rare occasions. My own identity as a lesbian femme remains regardless of how my partner identifies.

I tell you this as I am not ignorant of the stone identity and accept wherever anyone on the Planet is at in terms of theirs.

I simply believe that there is no need to make intolerant comments about other identities or sexual practices, while honoring who and what our own personal identity is.

That is it in a nutshell.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by Electrocell

As far as feminizing to me it means I don't like to be touched in my genital area or have anything inserted in me or my breast touched this is my preference because I was molested as a child. Just as some women don't go for going down on a woman or inserting her fingers in a woman that is their preference. I maybe wrong but I think the latter is what SilverStoneFemme was refering to as lesbian sex. It might not be politically correct term to use but some of us may not be as gifted with words as others. What people do in their bedroooms or wherever,with whomever is their business.

I disagree on your take of the OP's wording. Her use of "that lesbian thing" followed by an LOL anddd a "shutter" is not lesbian friendly references for "me" and it seems other folks.


She even went as far as to say

"that lesbian sex"

Clarifying she wasn't no lesbian.

Allll that led me to conclude she's kinda eeewing lesbian sex like there's something wrong with it.


Can we stop ewwwing, using derogatory terms against others when stating our desires.

[SilverStoneFemme]

i see the word warriors are out in force.

i dislike sushi......*shutter*......even thinking about it makes me shiver.....can't help it i'm a hardcore cooked fish eater.

That someone could take MY preference about what I LIKE AND DISLIKE and apply it to a whole community of people is unbelievable. my personal dislike for something doesn't demean those who have a preference for whatever it is that i don't care for.

i have the right to have my own preferences. If someone else dislikes stone sex, and finds it distasteful, and the vast majority of folx in the queer community AREN'T stone, that is not something i take personally. It simply means to each their own and one (wo)man's meat is another (wo)man's poison.

i made it clear that i was referring to MYSELF. Lesbian sex is not something i will ever do because, FOR ME, it's distasteful. Because i am a stonefemme.

Many folx find stone sex distasteful. They are entitled to their own personal preferences....and this is not something i would ever take away from them. Let them have whatever they think is appropriate FOR THEM.

i don't demean others for they personal preferences.......don't demean me for mine.

Should i get kicked off from this website, then so be it. i'll accept it. However, i did so standing up for my own personal beliefs.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme

You have the heart of a stonefemme even if you're also able to do that lesbian thing......lol.....*shutter*.....sorry, even thinking of that makes me shiver.....can't help it, i'm a hard core stonefemme............
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme


There are things i won't do, sexually, on an every day basis. Occasionally, ok. But all the time? Nope. That's that lesbian sex and i'm not a lesbian. i'm a queer stonefemme...........






Your wording in the first post was not speaking of your preferences and you insinuated it seems with a shiver and a shutter like it's not ok or something is wrong with it.

People can state their desires without having to be icked out on what others do.

Originally Posted by SilverStoneFemme

i see the word warriors are out in force.

i dislike sushi......*shutter*......even thinking about it makes me shiver.....can't help it i'm a hardcore cooked fish eater.

That someone could take MY preference about what I LIKE AND DISLIKE and apply it to a whole community of people is unbelievable. my personal dislike for something doesn't demean those who have a preference for whatever it is that i don't care for.

i have the right to have my own preferences. If someone else dislikes stone sex, and finds it distasteful, and the vast majority of folx in the queer community AREN'T stone, that is not something i take personally. It simply means to each their own and one (wo)man's meat is another (wo)man's poison.

i made it clear that i was referring to MYSELF. Lesbian sex is not something i will ever do because, FOR ME, it's distasteful. Because i am a stonefemme.

Many folx find stone sex distasteful. They are entitled to their own personal preferences....and this is not something i would ever take away from them. Let them have whatever they think is appropriate FOR THEM.

i don't demean others for they personal preferences.......don't demean me for mine.

Should i get kicked off from this website, then so be it. i'll accept it. However, i did so standing up for my own personal beliefs.

[The_Lady_Snow]

It wasn't till your second post that you said you were not a lesbian. I'm still not sure why you would refer to sex (lesbian sex) as:

"that lesbian thing......lol.."

I'm still trying to figure out the *thing* lesbians do that would be so LOL

Maybe you could clarify what that thing is and why it's LOL