09-02-2012, 09:08 AM | #1 |
Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
Troll Preferred Pronoun?:
she her Relationship Status:
engaged to my fiancee Amanda Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: cambridge MA
Posts: 230
Thanks: 703
Thanked 408 Times in 143 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
Permission to propose
Did anyone seek permission from their perspective father-in-law to propose? I was at a Super Bowl party at Mandy's house when I pulled her dad aside and asked if it would be OK to propose. He smiled,"Of course Steph!" He hugged me, telling me,"Welcome to the family."
|
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to stephfromMIT For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:12 AM | #2 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,113 Times in 3,390 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
Steph,
You may want to consider deleting the last name of Amanda's family. |
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to Soon For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:18 AM | #3 |
Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
Troll Preferred Pronoun?:
she her Relationship Status:
engaged to my fiancee Amanda Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: cambridge MA
Posts: 230
Thanks: 703
Thanked 408 Times in 143 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
|
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to stephfromMIT For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:24 AM | #4 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Human Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Where I want to be
Posts: 8,155
Thanks: 47,491
Thanked 29,291 Times in 6,640 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
We both told the parental units that we were getting married. Somewhere down the line, they forgot. We were both older and independent of the family unit, so no I did not feel the need to ask. They don't believe in LGBT marriage so it's rather a moot point.
__________________
"Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them".
~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee) |
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to Corkey For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:31 AM | #5 |
MILLION $$$ PUSSY
How Do You Identify?:
Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Iconic Ms. Relationship Status:
Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ** La Reina del Sur**
Posts: 22,488
Thanks: 32,231
Thanked 80,106 Times in 15,673 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
Thoughts
I'm not quite sure if I'll ask weatherboi's parents for permission to collar him. If I do I expect a long line of questioning regarding his security, well being, health so on. Mr weatherboi's Dad and I will probably go for some drinks and discuss these matters away from Mrs weatherboi's mom and him. We're old school like that.
__________________
"If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden Last edited by The_Lady_Snow; 09-02-2012 at 09:34 AM. |
09-02-2012, 09:33 AM | #6 |
Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Livin’ the Dream
Posts: 24,079
Thanks: 30,560
Thanked 54,939 Times in 13,921 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
no, HELL no.
|
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to girl_dee For This Useful Post: | aishah, BullDog, funkyfemme, G Snap!, Ginger, jac, Lady Pamela, Martina, Okiebug61, Parker, puddin', Soon, The_Lady_Snow, Toughy |
09-02-2012, 09:36 AM | #7 |
MILLION $$$ PUSSY
How Do You Identify?:
Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Iconic Ms. Relationship Status:
Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ** La Reina del Sur**
Posts: 22,488
Thanks: 32,231
Thanked 80,106 Times in 15,673 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
Curious?
So Steph, is Amanda going to request your hand in marriage to your parental units?
__________________
"If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden |
09-02-2012, 09:38 AM | #8 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Dominant Stone Butch Daddy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: In A Healing Place
Posts: 5,371
Thanks: 18,160
Thanked 22,757 Times in 4,468 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
I would not ask any formal permission from parents and family because I feel it is the person I am proposing to that has that right to make the decision whether she wants to marry me or not.
If I were to ask parents as a gesture of good will, then I would ask both parents if possible, not just the father. In my situation unfortunately that is not possible, so it would be just her Mother and possibly her two sons. But to be honest I think I would just propose without checking with family because I feel it is our decision.
__________________
Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. - Rainer Maria Rilke |
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to BullDog For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:38 AM | #9 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,113 Times in 3,390 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
No lover would ever think to ask anyone's "permission" (not even a word I would use) but mine when it comes to sharing a life together.
|
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to Soon For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:39 AM | #10 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Owned boy Preferred Pronoun?:
Hey boy!!! Relationship Status:
counting freckles slowly under Her direction!!! Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: i have 2 sets of geographic coordinates!!!
Posts: 6,097
Thanks: 26,797
Thanked 12,555 Times in 2,993 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
Usually at this point we get permission to do shots and my mom or pa-paw as i like to call her will head to the bar and i am following.
__________________
|
The Following 12 Users Say Thank You to weatherboi For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:45 AM | #11 |
Be the Fearless Bunny
How Do You Identify?:
Hers. Preferred Pronoun?:
he Relationship Status:
Medusa’s Snake Charmer Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: This must be the place.
Posts: 649
Thanks: 1,740
Thanked 2,685 Times in 540 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850 |
One of the things I really like about being queer is that it gives me more freedom to move outside of the centuries-old gender patterns, and think about what they represent. I can pick and choose what works for me, and assemble the best fit.
Asking my girlfriend's parents for permission to make a lifelong commitment to her (or her asking my parents for that same permission) is one of those gender-ownership rituals I'm happy to throw out the window.
__________________
I don't deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it. ~Flannery O'Connor |
The Following 22 Users Say Thank You to The JD For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:48 AM | #12 |
Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Livin’ the Dream
Posts: 24,079
Thanks: 30,560
Thanked 54,939 Times in 13,921 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
Maybe i am not as old fashioned as i like to think, but the thought of someone asking (only) my father to marry me seems pre-historic, to me.
i just could never conform to the whole father walking me down the aisle thing and *giving* me away, as if i am his property. i know others i am sure embrace this sort of ritual, but for me i find it archaic, especially since the mother of the bride (and groom) is excluded basically from the entire sacrament. Edited to add, if someone really knew me they would also know i would find it insulting to ask anyone's permission to marry me. |
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to girl_dee For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:55 AM | #13 |
MILLION $$$ PUSSY
How Do You Identify?:
Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Iconic Ms. Relationship Status:
Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ** La Reina del Sur**
Posts: 22,488
Thanks: 32,231
Thanked 80,106 Times in 15,673 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
More stuff
Since I'm the head of household cultural etiquette would require I ask his parents, cultural rituals for "me" are important and since in my family circle everyone knows I'm in command they aren't shocked nor is there a boy/girl assignment when these situations arise.
__________________
"If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden |
The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to The_Lady_Snow For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 09:58 AM | #14 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
gay. I'm very happy, thank you! Preferred Pronoun?:
Miss Relationship Status:
Chefhmboyrd's seeing eye blonde Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Nashvegas
Posts: 253
Thanks: 412
Thanked 1,109 Times in 229 Posts
Rep Power: 6596928 |
Since I asked chefhmboyrd to marry me, I would love to have the opportunity to ask his dad if I can marry him... but we lost the chef's dad two years ago.
|
The Following 12 Users Say Thank You to G Snap! For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:09 AM | #15 |
Family Man
How Do You Identify?:
TG Male Preferred Pronoun?:
Masculine ones Relationship Status:
She just gets me Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: .....
Posts: 2,828
Thanks: 2,997
Thanked 12,786 Times in 2,431 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
I asked my dad and Desd'd dad before I proposed..
__________________
This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name! Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh - erotic nightmares beyond any measure, and sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Don't dream it, be it. |
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to Bard For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:15 AM | #16 |
Be the Fearless Bunny
How Do You Identify?:
Hers. Preferred Pronoun?:
he Relationship Status:
Medusa’s Snake Charmer Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: This must be the place.
Posts: 649
Thanks: 1,740
Thanked 2,685 Times in 540 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850 |
What would you have done if the answer had been no?
I think that's what I'm having trouble wrapping my head around...
__________________
I don't deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it. ~Flannery O'Connor |
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to The JD For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:19 AM | #17 | |
MILLION $$$ PUSSY
How Do You Identify?:
Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Iconic Ms. Relationship Status:
Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ** La Reina del Sur**
Posts: 22,488
Thanks: 32,231
Thanked 80,106 Times in 15,673 Posts
Rep Power: 21474873 |
More thoughts
Quote:
If Mr weatherboi's Dad says no, I'm going to have to be honest and tell him to damn bad he's been branded, NO TAKE BACKS! It's not really about his parents for me, it's courtesy and a ritual.
__________________
"If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden |
|
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to The_Lady_Snow For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:23 AM | #18 |
☆ the stars are aligned ☆
How Do You Identify?:
strong, independent, badass redhead Preferred Pronoun?:
babygirl, buttercup, sugah Relationship Status:
married to my Boo Daddy <3 Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: east bay, cali
Posts: 2,907
Thanks: 3,643
Thanked 9,359 Times in 2,294 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
While I understand it is an old ritual, I do like that hy asked both father's. My family adores hym and we are all close as is, but I think it just made it go smoother, if that makes sense? No surprises, no omgwtfnooooo responses.. Of course, it dampened the moment when I went to tell my family and they all said "Yep we know!"
I asked hym what hy would of said had either one of our father's said no, and hy said hy would not have asked me then, hy would of proved hy was worthy of marrying me. I thought that was pretty sweet (Of course, I would of said yes regardless!) All in all I suppose I see it as a way of making sure everyone is on the same page and accepting, at least in our case. That, and I did not have to tell my extended family - my mom did that Mrs. Coppah |
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to bright_arrow For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:25 AM | #19 |
☆ the stars are aligned ☆
How Do You Identify?:
strong, independent, badass redhead Preferred Pronoun?:
babygirl, buttercup, sugah Relationship Status:
married to my Boo Daddy <3 Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: east bay, cali
Posts: 2,907
Thanks: 3,643
Thanked 9,359 Times in 2,294 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
|
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to bright_arrow For This Useful Post: |
09-02-2012, 10:31 AM | #20 | |
Family Man
How Do You Identify?:
TG Male Preferred Pronoun?:
Masculine ones Relationship Status:
She just gets me Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: .....
Posts: 2,828
Thanks: 2,997
Thanked 12,786 Times in 2,431 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
Quote:
My dad well I asked him if I could marry Desd cause he had asked me long ago not to get involved with anyone till Goose was adopted so that the EX could not use her against me
__________________
This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name! Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh - erotic nightmares beyond any measure, and sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Don't dream it, be it. |
|
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Bard For This Useful Post: |
Tags |
propose |
|
|