Have You Found Your Soul Mate?

[bigbutchmistie]

Well I saw this on yahoo and thought I'd share. I thought it would be a great topic. Do you believe in soulmates? If so or not why? Any comments are welcome...








Do you believe there is a soul mate out there for you? Well, you're not alone. Studies from the University of Virginia have shown that over 90% of young adults believe in the concept. And 88% believe that destiny has determined that there is one and only one person who is your soul mate.
The concept of the soul mate is thousands of years old and probably was originated by the Greek philosopher Plato. Plato described a soul mate as the person's "other half" that has been split from him. The quest of life is to find your missing half. That theme has been explored in movies like "The Butcher's Wife," "The Time Traveler's Wife," and "City of Angels." Other views of soul mates include reincarnation: our soul mate is someone with whom we have shared other lives.
The soul mate concept also carries with it the belief that a perfect person exists for us, if only we could find him or her -- then love and life would be easy. This belief has created a lot of trouble for people, especially in the area of commitment. By insisting on finding a perfect partner, many people have walked away from really great potential partners. Why? Because something was missing. Maybe it was chemistry, or that he/she didn't match their ideal of The One. So they've ended up alone, still looking for that perfect soul mate. The renowned family psychiatrist Frank Pittman once said, "Nothing has produced more unhappiness than the concept of the soul mate."
Having been a psychologist for more than 25 years, and married to one guy for the same long stretch, I can tell you that there are no perfect partners out there. Not me. Not my husband. Not any of my many clients, friends, or family members. Lasting love is a hard-won battle of personal discipline, compromise, dedication, and commitment.
Scientists have found that scent plays a role in physical attraction and desire. Other research shows that those who are of similar educational levels are more compatible. While I don't believe in The One perfect person idea, I do believe that there are better matches for us. And if we are with one of these people, we are more likely to have the experience of being with the one who is a soul mate (which I have had personally and can tell you, is a marvelous thing!).
The Indications
So chances are, there is more than one person out there who fits the bill for you. All of them are less than perfect. But if there are no perfect partners, how can you know whether to stay or go? Here are 10 relationship markers to help you know if he or she is The One:
1. When you're together you feel like you've come home.
2. You feel like your partnership was meant to be, as if kissed by destiny.
3. In your communication with each other there is a rapid "knowing" of what each of you means.
4. You have a shared mission in life, perhaps a cause, a career, or the creation of a family life.
5. When you're together the world seems like a better place.
6. Your mood is elevated when you're together. It's not necessarily passion or excitement, although that's there too at times.
7. When you look at him/her you see a part of yourself that's been missing. Perhaps it's her assertiveness or his joy of adventure. But it's something that when added to your life, makes you feel more complete.
8. Being together makes you more hopeful about the future you are creating.
9. You can be more authentic and fully yourself around your partner.
10. Being together makes each of you work harder on overcoming bad habits and becoming more loving people.
Don't worry if you don't feel all 10 of these things when you're with your partner. That's where the imperfection comes in -- either in you or your partner. If you are experiencing six or more of these markers, chances are you are matched well. Over time you can work towards having all of these qualities. Couples who have lasting love find that their relationships get closer and better over time. And that process has been my privilege and good fortune to experience personally -- after a lot of hard work that continues to this day!
Bottom line: your chances of finding The One are better than you think. So go out there and start looking. Love almost always comes in a surprise package that opens up in marvelous and magical ways

[Soft*Silver]

well, I dont believe there is only one soul mate. I have actually found that I have a set of two brothers who are my soul mates. They have both manifested in this life, but at different times. I also know there is at least one other soul mate.

I dont buy into the one and only one true love.

[BornBronson]

Yes I believe in soul mates.Call me weird but every since I was a wee one,i dreamt of a person in Ireland who was suppose to come to america and marry me and we would live happily ever after.It's the truth.If never happen of course but I always think of him somewhere out there yet,probably married,old and grey,and with many grandbabies.It happen like that cause I never did set foot in Ireland Or maybe he never came to America,end of story.

In kindergarten there was this boy who called me his soul mate.He said I would be his wife one day,he lived several blocks away from our home.He came calling on me everyday up to the time my parents lost our home and we were forced to move out.Afterwards i never gave him much thought,even many years later.But when I do think of him i wonder if he's still searching for me out there somewhere,that or just completely gave up ever finding me.

Yes,I believe in souls mates.

[always2late]

I have always believed in "the one". Throughout my life I have not had it personally...but I have seen stunning examples of it in others' relationships (my brother and his wife for one). I do believe that, for each of us, there is that one person in this world who is our missing piece. We just have to be lucky enough to find them.

[Jedi]

I was reluctant to post at the risk of sounding sappy and throwing my butch exterior. I believe in a soulmate of some kind. Someone who makes you feel complete. Someone that makes home feel like home. You only call it home because they are there. But I'm a hopeless romantic and eternally sappy by nature.....so go figure.

[Jet]

I nice notion, but no, I don't subscribe to the idea of a soul mate.

[afixer]

good artical, thanks.
I was thinking about this just yesterday...weird.

[girl_dee]

maybe I am a stick in the mud but I don't believe that my soul need or has a mate. My soul is my higher self, it's mine and not to be shared.

I do believe that many people use the term soulmate when actually it's a lustmate they are wooing over.

I also believe in lifemates, fuckmates, housemates, friendmates or whatever but soulmate?, not so much.

How will you know you have been with your *soulmate* until the end?

[Laidbackgrly]

I do beleive in soul mates i also beleive in love at first site too 2 people just lock eyes and the chemistry is there and you can feel it i have had it happen its too bad people just give up .

[bigbutchmistie]

Originally Posted by Laidbackgrly

I do beleive in soul mates i also beleive in love at first site too 2 people just lock eyes and the chemistry is there and you can feel it i have had it happen its too bad people just give up .

AMEN !!!!

[Ldyluck88]

Originally Posted by Laidbackgrly

I do beleive in soul mates i also beleive in love at first site too 2 people just lock eyes and the chemistry is there and you can feel it i have had it happen its too bad people just give up .

I believe in chemistry and all that, but I don't think people give up, I think there are more under lying factors involved and each situation is different, but that is whole new thread in itself..lol If we all had love at first sight and people grew together instead of apart, none of us would be single. There is always hope, and I never give up.

[Liam]

There have been several women, whom I believed to be my soul mate, however time proved that to be wrong.

[Sachita]

Originally Posted by Liam

There have been several women, whom I believed to be my soul mate, however time proved that to be wrong.

funny how that happens huh?

I think that we have strong desires and needs. We project them and hope someone will complete us but the truth is they can't. We want them to be our everything and they can't. You do this for yourself first and if it isn't perfect in love and passion you hope for a really great friend.

[julieisafemme]

My sister is my soul mate. We are mirrors and opposites of one another. But she annoys me sometimes and sometimes we don't understand one another.

Romantically I think you can have a connection with someone but a soul mate connection is not necessary for a successful relationship.

[Sachita]

Originally Posted by Laidbackgrly

I do beleive in soul mates i also beleive in love at first site too 2 people just lock eyes and the chemistry is there and you can feel it i have had it happen its too bad people just give up .

If someone gave up then it wasn't a soul connection imo. I believe in chemistry. I believe in love but I think we have many soul mates, not just one. Soulful connections where you know your paths were meant to cross, you feel strong love. I believe I will love many people in my life time. I do now and yet I still wait for that right "connection" , passion, adoration, etc. They might not even be my soulmate but the perfect partner. I need more then chemistry. I need something that fits right. If you're able to obtain it all then lucky you!