Female Bodies Across Gender Identities

[BullDog]

I got the inspiration for this thread from the new Blood threads. First there was Butch Blood. Then there was Femme Blood. Since most of the members here are either currently female bodied or were in the past, I thought what the heck why not BF Blood? Then I thought, well maybe something broader would be better.

No offense to the other threads at all, but I do sometimes wonder why we hardly ever talk about our common experiences of being female and/or female bodied despite our differences in gender identity. Or have conversations about our experiences across gender identities. Thoughts?

Anyway I just thought it would be interesting to see if we could have a conversation across genders about our various experiences of being female bodied.

[Cyclopea]

Are you objectifying my body?!?

[Waldo]

Originally Posted by Cyclopea

Are you objectifying my body?!?

Yes.

Got a problem with that?

[Pixie]

What a lovely idea. I think anyway.

I know I am currently reveling on the fact that clothing...whether you are buying guys or girls they assume the bigger you are the taller you are....hmmmm

Hope that doesn't derail...just wanted to contribute and that was what was on my mind!!!

Pixie

[PapaC]

Care to take a lead in the discussion? ie: topic that comes to mind (besides blood)? I've been curious to know (for quite some time actually) how trans* navigate around medical procedures, access to medical advice/expertise and how it may or may not compared to access as female bodied/women identified, generally speaking. (and that might be something I'll address in another thread)

I'll tell my thought process on this...

I'm female bodied but altered with 'more than average' 'secondary sex characteristics' where most would read as 'male'.

I'm listed as M (I believe) on almost all medical 'dialogue' if you will, in the province of British Columbia. Consequently, if I'm going to a lab for example to do blood work, no one there knows that I'm female bodied. In fact, I happily got undressed to my underwear to get x-rays done on my knees this week. (I don't pack).

Unless someone else is present on any sort of internal procedures and tests, only my physician(s) is aware that I'm female bodied (endocrinologists don't count as they fully know given my Testosterone therapy). There may/may not have been some confusion when I was patiently waiting for my appointment with my ob/gyn surgeon in the waiting room, and "Christopher" was called as the Dr.'s next patient. lol (imagine the possible looks as I followed the receptionist sporting a goatee. ;-) -FUN!)

I'm very very fortunate in my experiences in this province thus far. I'm very thankful that I personally have it framed in my head that I'm a human being FIRST seeking medical treatment (and that has made all the difference). My only real worry might be: when will/or if it does 'matter' that I reveal my at-birth gender 'assignment'..

or ya know what? why mince words really? I.am.female.bodied. period. What letter might be on a form or not isn't an issue. My current (and for some time will be) body configuration doesn't 'allow' for me to be 100% stealth. I'm at peace with that.

I think because I'm so heavily involved in my quest for health and medical access -- as I avoided doctors and examines for close to a decade (for example, didn't have paps for 10 years or more), that I'm very specific about what I call my genitals (munt, and magina words notwithstanding).

Not sure this is on topic per se, but I'm at least sharing some information of what its like for me specifically.

Carry on.

[Bit]

Originally Posted by BullDog

....I do sometimes wonder why we hardly ever talk about our common experiences of being female and/or female bodied despite our differences in gender identity. Or have conversations about our experiences across gender identities. Thoughts?

I'm too tired to be really coherent in any kind of deep discussion tonight, but I think this is a very valuable discussion that could benefit us all.

We do all start from the same general kind of place. We do have worlds of experiences in common.

I'm looking forward to the conversation.

[BullDog]

Thank you for all the responses so far.

Chris, I was wondering if I had left things too general- not leading with a specific topic- but I am hoping it will be a free flowing conversation and see where it goes.

Your post is definitely right on target!

I would love to hear from all gender identities who would like to discuss being female bodied from their personal experience and have a cross gender discussion about that so we can all learn from each other. Of course I am open to wherever the discussion takes us.

[I'mOneToo]

This is an interesting topic, but it seems like it might fall to the bottom of the fish bowl.

BullDog, I would look forward to reading your personal insights, too. I think PapaC has brought forth one aspect of this subject of "experiences across gender identities". PixieStars raised the issue of clothing. Not sure if that's the target you're shooting for but I can share a couple of experiences.

My outward experience is probably perceived as male. In body type, clothing, hair style, manner of speaking, etc. Yet, I am fully aware and comfortable with the female body that I inhabit. I go for regular checkups at the gynecologist, bi-annual mammograms, and it never strikes me that maybe others in the waiting room think I 'don't belong' somehow. Because I see myself as human first? I don't know.

One time, I went to buy some jeans at a department store. Men's jeans are displayed in the men's department. Usually I buy the same size, but holding up two pair of the same size marked, one looked smaller than the other. So I thought I'd better try them on, to get the pair that fit the best. Went to the sales clerk and asked if there was a fitting room nearby. She looked at the direction of the nearest one, which was in fact in the men's department. She immediately frowned and said "You cannot use the men's fitting room." I said, "I didn't ask that, I asked where the nearest fitting room was." She said, "You'll have to go to the women's department, which is across the store." Then I said, "Are there any men currently in the other fitting room, which is closer, who would be disturbed if I tried these on in there?" She said "It's store policy. Only men are allowed in the men's fitting room."

I thought about it for a second. Then I put both pairs of pants on the counter in front of her, turned around, and walked out. I have a policy too. And that is, I don't spend money at department stores that discriminate against people. If there had been even one customer inside the "men's" fitting room, I could see upholding policy. But with no other customers, and a potential sale standing in front of her, and the only thing wanted to try on was two pair of pants... well. Policy is policy, after all. But what I thought she was really doing, was policing my gender expression.

There are many other examples of experience across gender identity, but that's all I can think of for now.

[julieisafemme]

What an excellent thread!

[BullDog]

I'mOneToo, thank you so much for helping to revive the thread. I have definitely dropped the ball here. I will gather some thoughts together to share some of my experiences. Maybe the server move will give me some extra time to finish my assignment.

I don't really have any specific topics in mind to discuss here. Perhaps I am being too vague and that's not helping the thread along. It just struck me the other day that when we talk about our experiences as being female bodied we tend to keep them "in house" so to speak. Butches talk in butch threads, femmes talk in femmes threads, trans people talk in trans threads. I just thought it would be great for people of all different gender identities to come together to have a cross gender discussion about our experiences all in one thread and one discussion.

As to clothes shopping, that's a royal pain for me. First of all, I don't like to shop and hate trying clothes on. I do shop in the mens department but it's hard for me to find clothes to fit. Shoes are even worse. I have small feet so I have to shop in the kids department. Personally I wouldn't mind buying womens shoes but to me they all seem too girly for me. I usually buy boys shoes.

When trying clothes on I will sometimes use the mens department or sometimes carry clothes over to the womens department depending how I feel at the time. I do try to shop in off hours because I hate crowds. I haven't ever been told I couldn't use a mens dressing room. Awhile back, after I finished paying for some clothing I did hear a sales clerk (young woman) talking to another sales clerk saying why do I always get stuck having to help all the freaks.

I shall return with more thoughts soon. I hope more people of all gender identities will share their thoughts. Thank you for everyone who has posted so far. I am reading everything with great interest.