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08-15-2012, 05:21 PM
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#1 |
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Timed Out
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Changing last names
Amanda and I were in bed the other night. She was lazily stroking my pit hair and said,"Hun, I've been thinking." I got scared, and she smiled,"Baby, don't worry, we're still getting married." I calmed down and asked,"Then what is it?" She told me,"When we get married, I'm taking your last name." I smiled,"Amanda Thompson does sound nice."
So, did/will you or your SO change their last name if/when you marry/have commitment ceremony? |
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08-15-2012, 06:09 PM
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#2 |
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That's really terrific for the both of you...
In the islands, I had 5 couples that are my friends, and they all did legally change their last names, be it to their butches last or their femme's last name. And only 1 broke up years later. It's not legal to marry in Hawaii so they did the Holy Union style. They complained of it being costly, but they did what they felt best for their needs. Wishing both of you happiness and congratulations! |
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08-15-2012, 06:13 PM
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#3 |
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I have always thought I might hyphen my name with his...I like the idea of having his name.
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08-15-2012, 06:14 PM
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#4 |
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Yes she did. So we went to LegalZoom.com got the package, filled out all the forms, did the local paper, went to court and voila, then we went to Canada and got married legally.
Came back and filed all the paperwork with creditors, drivers license, W4...etc. It cost us more than a heterosexuals marriage would, but it is still worth it. I would seriously look up what hoops you have to jump through, and I would seriously recommend Legal Zoom for the paperwork, it all went smoothly.
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08-15-2012, 06:22 PM
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#5 |
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I'm thinking "de (insert his last name)" sounds good
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08-15-2012, 10:21 PM
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#6 | |
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Timed Out
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Quote:
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08-15-2012, 10:39 PM
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#7 |
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If I ever do get married, which I hope one day that I will, I would like to take my SO's last name
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08-15-2012, 11:51 PM
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#8 |
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I still have my married name, which I only took so I would have the same name as my children it meant nothing to me. I was not property, it was just easier to have the same name.
My children are grown and are taking on new names. I have kept my last name because I would not go back to my maiden name. And quite frankly I like the energy of my name, it is who I am. I changed my first name a few years ago so I know the importance of names. I know what it means to change your name and thus your identity. I never thought I would change my last name again. And then... something changed. For the right person, a person I decided to share a family with, a life with; if their name was important to them I would change. I would gladly take their name and share a common bond within our family. It would be our commitment to each other, to our family, to our lives together. Yes, I will gladly take your name.
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08-16-2012, 01:26 PM
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#9 | |
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"Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them".
~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee) |
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08-16-2012, 09:38 PM
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#10 |
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When I got married at 24, I changed my name & did so gladly. I endured YEARS of people making fun of my maiden name, mispronouncing it, being unable to spell it-even after telling them countless times. Now, I have a last name that you can at least pronounce when you see it.
Riley does not want to get married. And, I am still trying to finalize the divorce that I have actively been working to obtain for over a year now; I have not lived with the ex for over four years. Divorce is NOT designed for people who have limited means. As such, when Riley says "I am never getting married" I reply, "Good, then we can just live in sin." I do not think I would ever change my name again. I have the name that my kids have-and that is enough for me. 
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09-10-2012, 10:14 AM
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#11 | |
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It was important to my wife and I that we share a last name. However, since neither of us any reason to be committed to our fathers' names, we chose one for ourselves at random. No muss, no fuss ...
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08-15-2012, 06:53 PM
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#12 | |
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08-15-2012, 06:58 PM
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#13 |
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tantalizing says that if we marry/civil union, then she will take my last name.
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08-15-2012, 08:00 PM
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#14 |
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I wouldnt take a partners last name and I would be reluctant for them to take mine. It's a highly personal thing, partly steeped in history i.e. the name change indicated the shift of "ownership" from father to husband. That dynamic isnt me in any way, thus it is not appealing. Symbolically, even a hyphen indicates a "belonging to" in a way that makes me twitch. I prefer thinking of marriage, which is legal here, as a partnership of two individuals who have chosen to be together, mindful that each brings their own history, individuality, and legacy to the whole. To me, each retaining their own name and own historical legacy reflects this.
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08-15-2012, 08:03 PM
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#15 |
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Desd took my last name it meant a lot to me one thing I could give to her that I have never given to anyone
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04-10-2013, 02:11 PM
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#16 | |
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I echo this. I would never insist on it but it sure would make my heart swell up if she wanted to.
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08-15-2012, 08:04 PM
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#17 |
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This brings up and interesting line of thinking....I DO want to take Teddy's name when we get married....but then I will have a different name than my children. I suppose, their being both girls...its inevitable that this will occur at some time...I guess it would be silly of me to hold on to an old name for this reason. And truly, I dont have a name to go back to that's really mine....long story there....
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08-15-2012, 08:29 PM
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#18 |
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I hope she would but not a deal-breaker....
I've thought about this a lot actually....
In my family's tradition, we each get a new name as we cross the threshold of adulthood. After a lengthy period (years) of spritual work etc, we relinquish our "baby" names to embrace one which is more fitting of who we are as adults. (but really, your Grandmother is always going to be calling you by your baby name so don't even think you're gonna escape that! Yes Gram I'm looking at you....) Some family members have elected to have this be their new legal name while other family members use this new "adult" name only among family and during ceremonial occasions. My name is as unique to me as my fingerprint, it fits me perfectly. I hope my future partner would consider taking my name but it's not a deal-breaker at all. We each have different cultural traditions and opinions about names and certainly I respect Hers, whatever they are.... Having said that, it would be an immense honor if she chose to share my name. It's only in the receiving, that the gift is given. |
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08-15-2012, 08:13 PM
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#19 |
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no way
my last name is too awesome to give up.
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08-15-2012, 08:18 PM
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#20 |
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Well, since my partner (Justin) and I both have the same name, (Lisa) it would be even more confusing if I took her last name.... Haha! People can barely keep us straight now.... Butch Lisa or girly Lisa!? Haha :-)
And all hell is still breaking loose after trying to change my last name back to my maiden name after my divorce. So no, never changin my name again. I might not even go back to my maiden name. Not sure. Ugh. The headaches of name changes. Just say NO! Haha :-)
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