Parker's Pad

[Parker]

This popped up on my Facebook this morning - I can only imagine the comments people left on Reddit when they saw this woman's picture .....

To me, she is inspiring & beautiful ......






After going viral on Reddit’s ‘Funny’ section for being odd-looking with facial hair, the girl above gave the following graceful and fresh response:

“Hey, guys. This is Balpreet Kaur, the girl from the picture. I actually didn’t know about this until one of my friends told on facebook. If the OP wanted a picture, they could have just asked and I could have smiled However, I’m not embarrased or even humiliated by the attention [negative and positve] that this picture is getting because, it’s who I am.

Yes, I’m a baptized Sikh woman with facial hair. Yes, I realize that my gender is often confused and I look different than most women. However, baptized Sikhs believe in the sacredness of this body - it is a gift that has been given to us by the Divine Being [which is genderless, actually] and, must keep it intact as a submission to the divine will. Just as a child doesn’t reject the gift of his/her parents, Sikhs do not reject the body that has been given to us. By crying ‘mine, mine’ and changing this body-tool, we are essentially living in ego and creating a seperateness between ourselves and the divinity within us.

By transcending societal views of beauty, I believe that I can focus more on my actions. My attitude and thoughts and actions have more value in them than my body because I recognize that this body is just going to become ash in the end, so why fuss about it? When I die, no one is going to remember what I looked like, heck, my kids will forget my voice, and slowly, all physical memory will fade away. However, my impact and legacy will remain: and, by not focusing on the physical beauty, I have time to cultivate those inner virtues and hopefully, focus my life on creating change and progress for this world in any way I can.

So, to me, my face isn’t important but the smile and the happiness that lie behind the face are. :-) So, if anyone sees me at OSU, please come up and say hello. I appreciate all of the comments here, both positive and less positive because I’ve gotten a better understanding of myself and others from this.

Also, the yoga pants are quite comfortable and the Better Together tshirt is actually from Interfaith Youth Core, an organization that focuses on storytelling and engagement between different faiths. I hope this explains everything a bit more, and I apologize for causing such confusion and uttering anything that hurt anyone.”

[Parker]

According to my food diary, I took in 2180 calories yesterday, which is on track for where I need to be if I want to lose weight (2000-2500 cals/day).

Keeping track of my calorie intake really makes me evaluate what I choose and dont choose at the store more closely. I am making different choices - getting salsa and tortilla chips instead of Ruffles sour cream and cheese chips ... skipping over the cookie mixes that are on sale for $1, etc.

I also went and got low fat chocolate milk for my Carnation Instant Breakfast packets instead of whole milk -- and if I'd been at a different store, I would have gotten fat free, but this store only had regular skim milk, not chocolate - but I bought that too so I could try it with the Carnation because it would knock 100 cals off of the mixture.

I also got some strawberries, raspberries, and bananas for smoothies - but I want to learn how to make veggie ones and try one or two of those as well -- I really dont like veggies, but maybe if I mix certain fruits AND veggies, maybe I can drink them.

I made a meal replacement smoothie just now: 1 cup low fat choco milk, 1 packet of the Carnation, 1/2 a banana, and 1/2 cup of strawberries - it yielded 15g of protein, but also 480 calories (mainly from the milk AND Carnation) -- but that is still less than eating 1/2 of a box of Kraft mac-n-cheese, which is 600 calories.

Oh and I think I figured out why I lost that weight over the past few months: popcorn.

I was eating popcorn instead of chips (already thinking about changes, even back then) and sometimes even instead of a meal, I would sit down with some popcorn -- I thought that stuff was very high in calories because I get the "movie butter" kind - but apparently, each bag is just 140 calories - and, like I said, I was sometimes replacing meals with that.

Also, I am not as hungry as I used to be - not able to eat as much - so I used to eat a whole box of Kraft mac-n-cheese (I am poor, so this was a staple in my life for years and years) as a meal and sometimes I even added something like sausage or hot dogs -- and the mac-n-cheese by itself is 1200 calories a box!

So, it will be slow, but I will continue with the food diary and count my calories and make different choices at the store and at home so that I can hopefully lose some weight.

I am also trying the green coffee extract on the advice of a friend, so we will see if that helps - I am taking 2 caps a day for a month and I'll see if it works or if it is just another fad "diet."

[Parker]

I made a really good smoothie this morning but it wasnt filling, so I am thinking that I need to eat an actual breakfast and save the smoothies for snacks later in the day.

The smoothie I had:

1 package of Carnation Instant Breakfast
1/4 cup of low fat chocolate milk
1/4 cup of skim milk
1/2 of a banana
------------------------------------------
= 242 calories
& 14g protein


Because it wasnt filling, I was tempted, like yesterday, to give in and eat some pasta and meat - but I decided to go to the store instead and get some egg substitutes, baby bella mushrooms, and Kraft American cheese. I was going to get the low fat cheese, but honestly, the difference in calories per slice of regular vs. low fat was minimal, which was surprising, but a nice surprise.


So my breakfast was an omelet with fruit on the side:

1 container egg substitute (equal to 2 eggs)
2 slices of cheese
1/4 cup of baby bella mushrooms
Sea salt, pepper, and garlic powder to taste
with 1/4 cup of strawberries
1/4 of an apple on the side
------------------------------------------
= 238 calories
& 22.3g protein


I wont always count the protein, but I will at least keep protein in mind when choosing a breakfast and snacks.

Also, I dont know if the egg substitute was whole eggs, including the yoke or just egg whites - some said egg whites and some didnt. This was the store brand so it was cheaper, which was why I bought it because I didnt know if I would like it or not.

The more expensive (by over $1 for the same amount) stuff specifically said egg whites and had more calories than what I bought -- it had fewer calories per serving (25 vs. 30), but more servings in the containers (2.5 vs. 2) .... of course, I was also looking at protein and sodium - the 2 brands were pretty close in calories, protein, and sodium, so I may just keep buying the cheaper stuff.

Of course, breakfast is easy - it's the lunch, dinner, and snacks that can kick my ass because of the pasta or whatever; but I figure as long as I am eating a good, filling, and under 300 calorie breakfast, I am off to a good start.

[Parker]

I did really well yesterday - even though I was discouraged because my Wii Fit Plus says I have gained 2.5lbs - I ended the day with 1600 calories consumed.

I started with a smoothie at 0630, then an omelet (w/egg substitute, cheese and baby Bella mushrooms) at 0900, then a snack at 1200 of an apple, some chocolate milk, and 1/2 of a regular sized bag of M&Ms, then another snack at 1500 of a bag of popcorn, and at the last minute, I decided on another omelet with smoked sausage instead of pasta and smoked sausage for dinner at 1930 - I went to bed a few hours after that.

This morning I skipped the smoothie and just went straight to the omelet (w/egg substitute, cheese, baby Bella mushrooms, and green peppers) and 1/2 of an apple for breakfast. I may have a smoothie later as a snack.

I bought some DumDum suckers (20 calories each) because it helps me to not eat if I am chewing (sugarless) gum or sucking on a sucker -- I just need to be mindful of the calories and sugar in the suckers and not eat a ton of them back-to-back each day or it will defeat the purpose! lol

I have an appointment at the VA on Friday with the Endocrine docs - they handle all bariatric surgery consults - to discuss my weight and the possibility of bariatric surgery. I may bring in a copy of my food diary to show them what I have been doing to change my eating habits - but also, I will get to see what the VA scales have to say this week.

[Parker]

I was making out a holiday/Christmas/whatever list for my nieces and nephews - I have 10 nieces and nephews, a great niece, and a great nephew, but because I am poor, I lump the greats in with their mom and dad. lol

Anyway - I like the Kiva thing thedivahrrrself posted about (microloans to people in 3rd world countries who are trying to provide for themselves and their families), so I decided I will do Kiva cards for 4 of my N/Ns and then adopt wolves from Wolf Haven Int'l (<-- turn your volume down if you click that, they have a continuous recording of some of their wolves howling on the front page! ) for 4 other N/Ns.

I have 2 nephews who are sons to my little brother - we have been estranged and not spoken for over 10 years and they just moved, so I dont have their address; but one of his sons is on my FB so if I can get their address, I will adopt a wolf for each of them as well. If I cant get their address, I may get an on-line gift card, like Amazon or something and email that to them through FB.


My nephew and niece-to-be should have gotten their wedding cake server and knife today - I so wish I could be there for the wedding, but at least this way, I can be there in spirit.

I would love to visit them all - especially my mom, who I havent seen since 1999 - for the holidays - maybe in 2013 .....

[Parker]

Today's gonna be a high calorie day I think -- I had a hard time sleeping last night and ended up waking up in the middle of the night and just staying up (the puppy is keeping me up - I am just not a cuddler! lol)

I ate a small bowl of left over pasta and I havent gone back to bed since then because I had an appt at the VA and just got back from that; and I have a phone appt at 2pm. Also, I grabbed a quick chicken sandwich at the VA and ate that on the way home - and that was not low cal. lol

So far, I am at 1765 for today - I may end up going to bed after my phone appt though so the day might be "over" for me in a few hours. Also, I have done really well, averaging just under 1700 cals/day over this past week (including today) so I am still on track I think.

I seem to really love the egg substitute omelets, but I usually get on something and eat the hell out of it for a while - I did that with tuna a few weeks ago and then salads a few weeks before that - so this may or may not last long. They make a good breakfast though, so I am trying not to burn myself out on them.

I dont understand how I can being keeping a diary and keeping trck of calories and trying to eat only a certain amount and still be gaining - that is frustrating. When I went to the VA today, they had me at 265 which is still good - their chart said I was 275 back in May, but it is 5lbs more than when I was there last week ..... ugh.

Whatever, I am just going to keep on going. They said I am a good candidate for their bariatric surgery because my BMI is 38 and I also have other stuff going on like the diabetes, High BF, high cholesterol, fatty liver, sleep apnea, etc .... listed out like that, I look like a friggin mess! lol

But they are still months away from their first candidates for surgery because they are still finalizing how they will work with the chosen outside hospital down in Tacoma, WA. She made it sound like I might be on the short list when it is time though - and she seemed optimistic. She also said I would be a better candidate for gastric bypass instead of lap band, so that's what I would get.

In the meantime, I will just keep making any small changes I can to eat better and I will continue with my Wii and Wii Fit Plus - they also gave me a pedometer so I can keep track of how much I walk each day - I am at like 1251 steps over the past 24hrs (1 mile = 2000-2400 steps), lol, so there's that!

[Parker]

I think I may have perfected my omelet - it took me a couple of tries! It is really filling because of the hash browns (stole that idea from a local diner) so I wont make it this way every time, but it turned out really good. )

In a small skillet, I mixed .5 cup of shredded potatoes - I use "Simply Potatoes" from the store (70 cal) with .25 cup of diced white mushrooms (4 cal), .5 TBS of diced green peppers (1 cal), and about a TBS of margarine (60 cal) and browned it all together on medium heat with some pepper, garlic powder, and sea salt.

Then when that was done, I added .5 cup of egg substitute (60 cal) in a separate skillet (I use an 8" skillet and it comes out great every time), also on medium heat and as that started to cook, I added 2 slices of Kraft American Cheese (120 cal) to half of the omelet; and when the cheese started to melt and the egg was close to being done, I spread the hash browns with the mushrooms and green pepper onto the whole omelet and let that sit for, what, like 20 seconds, then I flip the no-cheese side over onto the cheese side then let it sit again for about 20 seconds and moved it onto my plate - that's the pic you see there.

Total calories for omelet: 315

If I skip the hash browns, I usually add half of an apple on the side (the added hash browns make the omelet too filling for me to add the apple) which replaces the 130 cals of the potatoes and margarine with 26 cals for half of a medium sized apple, for a total of 211 calories.





I have been doing really well lately - making pretty good choices and watching what I buy and eat. I did break down last week and get a double Whopper with cheese, but a slip here and there is expected.

I hadnt done too badly that day though, so I was still within my 2000-2500 cals/day goal that the VA said I should shoot for. Compared to most other days though, when I average around 1800 cals/day, the 2200+ I took in that day felt like a bit much.

Maybe next time, I just get a Jr. instead. lol

[Parker]

So, small vine tomatoes only have 15 calories? What a nice addition to an omelet without adding a lot of calories. )

At some point, I will get tired of these omelets and I'll have to find other things to eat - but for now, this is what my body and taste buds crave the most, so I am having 1-2/day and other meals are other things like pasta, chicken, etc.

I had a slice of pepperoni pizza at yesterday's adoption event - such is the peril of being away from home all day - but while it was over 800 calories, I didnt eat much else that day: a couple of low cal snacks and an omelet for breakfast, so it worked out alright.

Today, I had some chicken drum sticks and potatoes, which was a huge meal as far as calories, but again, the other things I have eaten havent been many calories, so it evens out at the end of the day.

It's kinda difficult to pass up the sweets and treats when I am at the store and the not going out to get fast food because I dont feel like making something at home is hard - but it is easier than it used to be and also as long as I keep counting calories, I can remind myself of what that burger or piece of cake would cost me. lol

So far, the changes are working out - of course, I havent weighed myself in a week - maybe I should hop onto my Wii Fit Plus and get a weight and BMI test. lol

[Parker]

I hopped onto my Wii Fit Plus today to see where I was and I've lost 5lbs since last time (couple weeks).

This is a chart of the past month - so since mid-September. The weight gain was right before I decided to start my food diary and calorie count, which was September 28th - the red dot is me checking my weight and seeing the gain just as I started the food diary.

As you can see, I reached my goal - I dont remember what it was though lol. This time, I made my goal 4lbs in a month - but I cant remember if it's 1lb or 2lbs a week that is healthy and a good goal ... I can always change my goal or if I reach it quickly, I can make a different goal for next time, like 8lbs in a month or something.

The 28th is also when I started the green coffee extract, so that may or may not be a factor - I've been forgetting to take it 2x/day every day for the last week though - I took it 2x/d 7d/wk for about 10 days, then slacked off because I kept forgetting lol, mostly taking it once a day and then one day I missed both caps - so if anyone is considering taking it, I dont know if that is a contributing factor or not in the weight loss, to be perfectly honest.

[Parker]

On October 25th, I hopped onto my Wii Fit Plus after noticing 3-4 days earlier that I dropped almost 2 lbs since the week before, but I stopped taking the green coffee extract by then (no side effect problems, just kept forgetting to take it and thought why not stop to see if the weight loss continues w/o it) AND I had that really bad 3100 calorie day filled with fast food ...

But when I checked, I saw that I lost another 4lbs and had broken through the 250 lbs barrier (247) - at least as far as my Wii Fit Plus is concerned, lol, I have to add about 10 lbs to guess the weight at which the VA scales would weigh me.

-----

This morning, I checked again and am up almost 2lbs from last week's check -- now that I am starting to tire of the filling and high protein but low cal omelets, it is getting harder to find inexpensive things that are easy and quick to make, that I like, and that are not high in calories.

I am still under 250 (on my WFP, so at the VA I am probably closer to 260), but *just barely* -- maybe I should start the green coffee extract again, since it seems to have helped ....

Yesterday, I wanted to get a breakfast sandwich from Jack in the Box (the ultimate, which is egg cheese, ham, bacon on a croissant) but I would usually eat 2 of those and they were over 400 calories each ... ! ... so I backed out of the drive thru and went home. lol

-----

This is so hard .... I really want a pizza.

[Parker]

I think my favorite time(s) of the day is just after the packs eats.

Before they eat, things are all hectic - and barky because Sally, the new pup hasnt learn all of her manners yet & she barks at me, demanding her food.

It also takes me a while to get them their meals ..... Jack gets anxious so he eats in here (the office) by himself, but Zeke waits with him while I get their meals ready; and Sally is locked in the bedroom because, again, she hasnt learned all of her manners yet, so she tries to eat everyone's food! Of course, the little old man is with me because he is (a) little, (b) old, and (c) disabled.

In the mornings, 2 of them eat kibble and 2 eat dehydrated food, which takes 5 minutes to dehydrate. Jack gets his Prozac, Sally and Zeke get tummy supplements, Sally gets fish oil because she has itchy skin, and they all get vitamins - Max's gets crushed up so he doesnt have to chew it. I also sometimes toss a little pumpkin into their food if I noticed them having poop issues.

In the evenings, Max eats dehydrated food again, but the other 3 get kibble. They all also get Brewer's Yeast and garlic supplements and coprophagia chews and Sally, again, gets some fish oil for her itchies.

So with everything that needs to be done, it's all kinda crazy getting them all their food.

But after they eat and everyone is set free out of their respective rooms, they all go from bowl to bowl sniffing and licking to make sure who ever ate out of that bowl got every last crumb. lol

It sounds silly, but it's such a cute moment - especially when more than one of them is trying to clean out the same bowl at the same time (usually Zeke and Sally - they are so alike, those 2) - so I guess it's just one of those little things that makes me stop and smile when I see them doing it - no one's fighting, barking, or acting crazy, they are just quietly eating their food and then cleaning out each other's bowls.

[Parker]

lol, this has kinda become more of a blog than a place to put my writing - but I havent been inspired to write much in a long long time, so I would just be recycling old stuff here and I dont want to do that.

That being said, here's another blog entry about my weight loss efforts. lol

-----

I got kinda tired of omelets because I was eating too many of them - like 2-3 a day - I got burned out! But today I felt like an omelet so I made my self one with cheese, mushrooms, orange pepper (thought I'd step away from the green for a minute), and tomatoes - and, of course, I paired it with half of an apple, but got Gala this time and it was such a juicy and sweet apple - so good!

Anyway, I had been slipping over the past week - instead of taking in an average of 1700 or so cals a day, I was taking in more like 2100 cals a day - which is still below my 2500 max, but above the 2000 I was trying to stick to or under in order to continue to lose weight.

Because I thought about it today and this might be too ambitious, but if I can continue on this path of 10 lbs a month, I would ht 200 lbs by my birthday ....

It would mean being more diligent about not slipping, but I might be able to do it -- unless these last 20 lbs were a fluke and I will either gain it all back over time or my losses will taper off to 2-3 lbs a month instead of 8-10. I guess we'll see by the end of Nov!

[Gemme]

Galas are good, but you should try a honeycrisp or a sweetie. Super juicy and yummy sweet. Totally worth the cost.

[Parker]

I'll look for those the next time I'm at the store - thanks.

[Parker]

My baby FMD, Sally loves when I say her name in a kind of sing-song way:

"SallyBear! SallyBear! Who's my SallyBear?" lol

Also in this vid:
Zeke, my 10yo Boxer/Pit - the red & white dog
Jack, my 3yo FMD - the black/white dog w/o big black splotches on his back
Max, my little old man, an alley dog from Taiwan who's about 8+yo - the little brown dog

[ScandalAndy]

I love your writing, this thread is great, it's like a little glimpse of Parker! Thanks for writing!

[Parker]

Just a little something I thought important enough to share.

Honoring Those Who Served: 11 Ways to Celebrate Veterans Day
Posted by Elisa Essner


Veterans Day is almost upon us.

It’s the one day set aside each November to honor those who have served and continue to serve our nation. The holiday also offers a great opportunity to teach civilians about the sacrifice service members and their families make year-round. How do you plan to celebrate this year? Here are some ideas for activities to try at home, school and work.

Civilians can find multiple ways to honor veterans in their lives and communities.
Before you get started, you might want to brush up with this brief history of the holiday.

At home

• Wear a red poppy or yellow ribbon to show support for veteran and active duty service members.
• Organize a care-package packing party. Check out these tips and ideas for putting together a great care package. If you don’t know someone currently stationed overseas, contact a nearby base or an organization like Blue Star Moms to identify troops in need.
• Visit a veterans’ hospital. Chatting with elderly or injured veterans is a great way to brighten their day, plus you’re likely to hear some highly fascinating stories about their time in the service.
• Get creative. Check out this article for some patriotic craft ideas. For young children, a fun project is a great way to start teaching about the holiday and its importance.

At school

• Encourage your child’s teacher to develop a Veterans Day lesson plan. A timeline or short writing project is a great way for students to learn about the holiday’s history. This article offers a few other educational ideas.
• Invite a veteran — a parent, grandparent or faculty member, perhaps — to speak to students about what it’s like to be in the military. Don’t know any veterans to invite? Contact your local VA; their Public Affairs Officer will likely be able to identify a good guest speaker. There are many veterans who work at VA facilities and would be happy to be to speak to students.

At work

• Take time out of the day to acknowledge veterans in your workplace. Consider an office-wide coffee break featuring these remembrance poppy cookies or a yellow ribbon cake. You just need your favorite cake mix, yellow frosting and a ribbon pan. During the event, make sure to recognize each veteran employee. (Plan ahead to make sure you don’t miss anyone.)

Find an event in your community

• Want to find a local Veterans Day event? Many communities hold parades and vigils. Contact your local VA for more information.

Honor veterans year-round

• Celebrate with service. Show service members your gratitude throughout the year with a home-cooked meal, thank you note or day of volunteering. Check out this post from HandsOnBlog for more specific ideas.
• Support veteran-owned businesses. Websites like buyveteran.com can help you identify such businesses in your area.
• Express thanks. Whenever you see someone in uniform, extend a simple word of gratitude or small act of kindness to show how much their service means to you.

Posted by Elisa Essner
elisa.essner@veteransunited.com

[Parker]

So I've been eating this Yoplait yogurt light with all of these dessert flavors .... they make a nice snack but also a pretty good dessert.

Red velvet cake = awesome
Boston cream pie = awesome
Apple turnover = awesome
Key lime pie = awesome
Banana cream pie = good
Strawberry shortcake = good
Orange creme = good
Raspberry cheesecake = good
Lemon cream pie = a little too tart

[Parker]

The Marsha Norman play 'Night, Mother was on my mind tonight ...

For those who dont know, 'Night, Mother is a play set in real time with no breaks - it is about a woman, Jesse (played my Sissy Spacek in the movie) who has lived with her mama, Thelma (played by Anne Bancroft) for years. She is disabled and cant work (epilepsy if I remember correctly) and she rarely, if ever, leaves the house.

Jesse decided to kill herself because her life is nothing and going nowhere. She isnt depressed or anything, she just feels that if this is all there is then she doesnt want to stay. The play is the 2 hours before she kills herself and she is spending that time getting the house in order, making lists, and mostly just explaining to her mama why she is doing what she is doing.

It has one of my favorite monologues in it - I actually pieced 2 into 1 to help that last paragraph, which is my favorite, make sense:

Mama, I only told you I was going to kill myself so I could explain it, so you wouldn't blame yourself, so you wouldn't feel bad. There wasn't anything you could say to change my mind. I didn't want you to save me. I just wanted you to know. Don't you see, Mama, everything I do winds up like this. How could I think you would understand? How could I think you would want a manicure? That we could hold hands for an hour and then I could go shoot myself? I'm sorry about tonight, Mama, but it's exactly why I'm doing it. I'm not giving up! This is the other thing I'm trying. And I'm sure there are some other things that might work, but might work isn't good enough any more. I need something that will work. This will work. That's why I picked it.

Mama, listen. I am not your child, I am what became of your child. I found an old baby picture of me. And it was somebody else, not me. It was somebody pink and fat who never heard of sick or lonely, somebody who cried and got fed, and reached up and got held and kicked but didn't hurt anybody, and slept whenever she wanted to, just by closing her eyes. Somebody who mainly just laid there and laughed at the colors waving around over her head and chewed on a polka-dot whale and woke up knowing some new trick nearly every day and rolled over and drooled on the sheet and felt your hand pulling my quilt back up over me.

That's who I started out and this is who is left. (There is no self-pity here) That's what this is about. It's somebody I lost, all right, it's my own self. Who I never was. Or who I tried to be and never got there. Somebody I waited for who never came. And never will. So, see, it doesn't much matter what else happens in the world or in this house, even. I'm what was worth waiting for and I didn't make it. Me...who might have made a difference to me...I'm not going to show up, so there's no reason to stay, except to keep you company, and that's...not reason enough because I'm not...very good company. (A pause) Am I? Just let me go, Mama, let me go easy.

Mama, I know you used to ride the bus. Riding the bus, and it's hot and bumpy and crowded and too noisy, and more than anything else in the world, you wanna get off. And the only reason in the world you don't get off is it's still fifty blocks from where you're going. Well, I can get off right now if I want to. Because even if I ride fifty more years and get off then, it's still the same place when I step down to it. Whenever I feel like it, I can get off. Whenever I've had enough, it's my stop. I've had enough.

[deb0670]

i understand about the name.. Deborah is mine too.. except when i was a kid i hated it. Anyone outside of my family call me that they wanted a fight on their hands. Now that i am older, i do not mind it, however, unlike You, when i introduce myself to anyone it is always, "Hiya i'm Debbie".
I have thought about changing my name many times... not cause of me being Butch( far from lol), but just cause every mom's aunt's cousin's neighbor is named Deborah, Debra or Debbie... ugh..
I applaud You for choosing a name(s) that fit You and help You be more "You".

Maybe one day i will have that courage.