Divorce: What's next??

[Karysma]

So for any of you who haven't been subjected to my sob story.. My partner/spouse of 18yrs wants a divorce. She told me about the divorce almost a month ago, and I found about the 'other woman' about 2wks ago (who has been in the picture for over a year - and significantly involved for 4-6months). This is the second time with this other person who lives overseas. We still live together because we own a house and will be unable to afford other arrangements until the house sells. She has been pretty considerate in that I never see her communicating with this other person in any way. She behaves much the same way as she usually does. Only thing is that I have to remember not to grab her hand, or give her a good bye kiss.. and obviously we do not sleep in the same room any more. I am just acutely aware that I am living with someone else's boyfriend.. even though it is my spouse.

I feel so damn lonely! I feel rejected. Some part of me wants to join a dating website and find someone to hang out.. but most of me feels like this is too soon - and that if I did this I would feel like I was cheating.. even though this would be ridiculous under the circumstances.

So, my question is.. for those of you who have some knowledge of this kind of a relationship...

1. How long did you have to wait till you started dating?
2. Did it feel like cheating?
3. Should I wait until I get divorced? I have looked into some local singles get togethers.. but I'm not single... and I sort of am...

I realize that this is totally selfish and that it would be classic rebound behavior. I really don't want to drag anyone else into my drama..

Hmm.. it just occurred to me that maybe I should try just being on my own. Maybe that's the answer?

How does one become comfortable with loneliness?

Help! Any thoughts??

I need a little perspective or something..

Give it to me!