09-02-2012, 07:14 AM | #61 | |
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09-02-2012, 09:01 AM | #62 |
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i've had a love-hate relationship wit' therapy fo' mos' o' mah adult life. yet, it's been mah savin' grace.
i now realize i'm fucked up enough to try! yes, i did jus' say dat. as i used to think i was too fucked up to even give it a go. i have found i'm lovable despite my fuckedupedness. and dat is a relief beyond b'lief....
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09-02-2012, 09:20 AM | #63 | |||||
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I'm glad this thread is here
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09-02-2012, 12:33 PM | #64 | |
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Did you take the time to truly know? |
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09-02-2012, 03:11 PM | #65 |
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I am glad that by me posting this thread about something I honestly felt that it has been helping others, I do belive that we all have some form of fuck upness and baggage, but when the time is right there will be a person come along and I truly belive everything will just fall into place, The past few days have been really hard on me, dealing with a lot of personal bs but my friends here at the planet have really kept me going with positive thoughts, thanks everyone for being you and thank you to everyone responding to this thread, it really does help
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09-02-2012, 03:43 PM | #66 | ||
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09-02-2012, 04:13 PM | #67 | |
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I don't think it's true that we can't find someone to love us because of our baggage. I think people fall in love all the time, unaware of the other person's baggage. I do not, however, think we should expect others to put up with bullshit caused by our baggage. It's ours to own, deal with, and control. This isn't to say that we should be perfect, but loving someone doesn't equate to putting up with destructive behaviors. If someone's baggage is so much that it's affected every relationship they've ever been in, then they should take time out of relationships and work on their issues until they can function in a relationship that isn't controlled by those issues. In my opinion, it's irresponsible to do otherwise.
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09-04-2012, 12:45 PM | #68 |
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Thank you all very much again I cant say it enough, all of your words and thoughts have really helped, life kind if took a rough turn and I had a very bad day when I wrote this. They also had me on a medicine for my health called prednisone and its also known to mess with someone's mind. I now realize that it was silly to think that I or anyone is too screwed up to love. I know I just like everyone else with baggage is not unloveable. I've had bad stuff happen but who hadnt there are people a lot worse than me. Yes I am sick and who knows what the future holds but I know that no matter what I can and am capable of loving and being loved, lately I have come across a few beautiful women but they just like me have baggage and one in particular accused me of being depressed just so didn't have to talk to me she created and made up stuff because of her own issues, but I just keep being friends with anyone and I myself know that no matter how crazy or screwed up someone is I won't give up on them. Thanks again to everyone who read and responded and I am always around just send me a pm if you nerd a friend
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09-18-2012, 12:30 AM | #69 |
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So I revisit my thread and I think I have finally had a breakthru in my own personal crap! Im not too screwed up, I just needed to clear my mind refocus and things are getting better! Im starting something new and its very unfamiliar to me , scary but in a good way, I just hope I don't mess it up but with a positive attitude I think things will be ok, and at the end if the day I have the best love anyone could want that of a child that love comes with no conditions and nothing better than kissing my little one goodnight!
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09-20-2012, 02:32 PM | #70 |
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So a lot can change in a week, I have decided to just focus on me and my little one! She loves me for me, and as for everything else it will fall into place when it's supposed to!
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09-20-2012, 09:03 PM | #71 |
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Best to focus on yourself for now Charming, I'm starting to do that too and its making a world of difference for me
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11-29-2012, 09:54 PM | #72 |
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O my I sure know all about this , i have issues that i cant do anything about right now ,It makes it hard for others to want to be be with me or/and sometimes be even my friend ....I have started to work on my stuff and I do hope within a few months i will be on the right track ....just never give up !I refuse to think and or let others hold me down any more ....i had a pretty messed up childhood as well and yes it can be hard to get past that and not let it seep into ever day life but ...sometimes ya got to just tale a really deep breathe close your eyes and le it all go ...have a good cry ...it cleanses the soul .Then Take one day at a time ....Thats what im doing ..
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03-29-2013, 04:07 PM | #73 |
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I used to be. But I have learned a whole different me exists. Thank God!
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04-08-2013, 08:14 AM | #74 |
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Well, I am an ugly femme so you might not appreciate my opinion but...
Noone has ever so much as wanted to flirt with me in a bar or buy me a drink so... I would take anything I can get, but that seems to be nothing and nobody. So it's not a matter of being screwed up, it's all about your standards etc...Like if you're superficial of course you're not going to find true love. Really wheneever I see stuff like from guys or butch lesbians about oh am I ever going to find someone the only thing I can think of is, this person would reject MY love in 5 seconds so... Can't take it seriously. |
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04-09-2013, 01:27 AM | #75 |
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On Bad Days...
Sometimes I know the feeling. I've had a couple serious realtionships go sour, and it seems to always leave me wondering what's wrong with me. It's only years later when I'm looking back, remembering the new terms I learned, like "emotional abuse," and "sexual discrepency," where I can have some peace and know that I'm not unlovable, it just wasn't the relationship for me. Like I'll look at my ex from 10 years ago, and she's a character and really funny with her goofy temper and all the off-the-wall stuff she says, but I can't believe I ever beat myself up over her opinions.
She cray. |
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04-09-2013, 05:32 AM | #76 | |
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Hi, 4everlonelyfemme. I was thinking about your post. I wanted to tell you, for what it's worth, that I've always noticed that people's level of attractiveness (based on whatever cultural standard you hold), seems to have no correlation at all to whether or not they're in a relationship, or in a good relationship, for that matter. I look around at the people I know in couples, and some are movie-star gorgeous; others, more unique looking. I think it has more to do with their personalities, their access to a community, dumb luck, etc. Just thought I would share that with you. Scout
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04-09-2013, 12:17 PM | #77 | |
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When I was an 18 year old butch, and young like you, I was delusional too, thinking the opposite of ugly. I thought I was such a good-looking, white-knight, (but in reality, I was really conceited and co-dependent, who thought I knew everything.) So , when I met a damsel in distress like you, I tried to help her. (and deep down, we both felt unworthy, but tried to save each other anyway) so she'd love me forever and not be lonely anymore. And because of our co-dependency needs, we trauma bonded, and complained about the world together, and became crazy together and dysfunctionally in/compatible together. and on and on it went... Like that song by Eminem, Love The Way You Lie.- quote "you're the same as me." |
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04-09-2013, 01:09 PM | #78 | |
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I was a mess at your age. Now at 56 I know for a fact that I'm beautiful, funny, smart, quirky, loving, impossibly onery, cuter than hell, and irresistable. (except when i'm on my pity pot to my great embarrassment) I am FEMME. Make no mistake, I love myself first because that's where love lives. (keep in mind this is a daily challange) Inside us. Love is not found outside of your self. (learned the hard way) Become the love you are looking for. Knowing love means you will recognize it when you come across it in others. (That's my belief) Focus on giving to others, not receiving. Last edited by Sweet Bliss; 04-09-2013 at 01:26 PM. Reason: sounded to pompous |
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04-09-2013, 04:30 PM | #79 |
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I used to think I was too screwed up to be loved and lost both a lover and really great friend. I didn't see what I had and kept her at arm's length.
One thing I learned was why I did that and what lesson I learned from that relationship. 1. It wasn't entirely my fault (best lesson to learn) 2. If you really care about someone, it's ok to put the walls down. 3. It's ok to be different, just make sure you fit in each other's world instead of one trying to fit into the other's world. 4. Make sure the relationship is a two way street. 5. Self esteem is the most beautiful part of a woman.
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04-20-2013, 11:05 AM | #80 |
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Too screwed up to be loved? Yep! But that's ok...I love and respect myself
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