Halp! I never developed gaydar and I need...

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by deedarino

To me gaydar is about recognition. We just notice what we recognize. You recognize some things, actions in her (she has some butch style for sure) but her "look" is causing misfires in your brain...lol.

What I see in your description is a person who knows you are gay, and is purposefully sending you "hints" to say...hey look at me. Now she may not be gay, but she is definitely enjoying the ride...

The best part of all will be figuring out why she is enjoying the ride. The next 10 months are gonna FLY by...lol.

well, I suppose it might be her look, but long hair doesn't normally get in my way of recognising... I think I'm wary because she's a world class athletic jock tuner-uper. So she's very jock herself (she has to be. She lifts, flips, physically restrains, 6 foot plus rugby players, large and powerful swimmers etc) - she knows her anatomy inside out and can take you down with a thumb jabbed in the right place) and having been on rowing teams in university myself, I KNOW how dykey they look/feel/present but are absolutely straight and get extremely offended if you think they are gay - due to everyone calling them dykes all the time.

*IF* I still feel attracted to her by the end of the course I'll ask her out. However, because she is so firmly taking me in hand to mould me into a graduate worthy of the institution and possibly having a shot at the one placement offered end of course, I need to knock the attraction on the head and shove it where all unavailable people go (sexy mates who have wives etc) and that's in a small box in the back of my head to fade. I'm very capable of doing this, very *used* to doing this lol

So by the time 10 months pass there's a chance I'll just be "over it".

But I would still like to know! It's an interesting game this! and never played it before! I always found it DULL when people speculated about highly feminine women. But yeah, she has the presenting bravado and masculine attitude that I recognise in my exes. lol and the ME ME ME LOOK AT ME I CAN MAKE YOU LAUGH thing I find very sweet and typical.

Recently, I've dated two dykes who didn't ID as anything but I've said to one "you know for someone who doesn't like to be called a duck, you quack louder than many ducks I've known..."

and when things ended, she wrote me and thanked me for helping her come to understand herself and realise who part of her really was.

The other one was similar. They both also had habits of screwing around with bicurious bored housewives (they live in very small towns and villages) rather than the 2 other single lesbians.

Both these women were over 45. And watching them come in contact with parts of themselves denied, purely because of the long term relationships they were in ... they loved their partners and had no idea the private things about themselves they stuffed into boxes as "unimportant and ok to sacrifice" were actually VERY important. Being someone's first femme at 40+ .... I have to say it's deeply lovely to watch them blossom into themselves.

So I DO wonder sometimes with the ones that don't ID, what is it about *me* that they are attracted to.

Those types of dykes there *is* sort of a mental checklist for me to see if there's a butch put in a box. One is how they physically interact with me. That's big. The second is their history of choice in local partners. third in language about sex, if we get to casually blabbing around it. They will hide things so they don't appear to want something "like a man" because they've probably been criticized about it, but I can leave a very obvious bread crumb trail and make it very obvious I'm not going to judge them and in fact I loooooove what they have been thinking about when they've been screwing those bisexual curious bored housewives.

So it's nice to speculate about if Senior Instructor would enjoy that... would I be her first in that way? Or is she actually partnered with someone who does that already? Does she have a male partner? etc.

Re: Yoga instructor - LOL! Great story!

you know a straight friend of mine had a horrible straight-girl crush on a belly dance teacher and followed her everywhere. I know these straight girl crushes. I've had straight girls do that to me. It's strange. They even want to snog etc but I can tell sexual curiosity from honest deep lust. I have had two striaght mates have odd straight girl crushes on me for *years*. I think those ones are my "romantic friendships" - platonic. I can do that with femmes myself. I get femme crushes that I highly doubt I'd enact on (welll... heh... that's a lie, I can think of a couple of femmes I'd be happy to have a friendly roll with...)

Speculations... definitely a fun game. It's just never been something I've been able to join in and play before!