Been in NYC for a month now..

TaylorMade · 07-21-2012, 06:23 PM

Hi everyone..been a while sense I wrote in here so I figured I would catch you all up.
Things are going rather well here, still loving it. Still looking for work. Sadly you would think this city would have a lot, but I have put in so many applications and sent out a lot of resume's that I still have not heard nothing back.
I am staying with a friend of a friends right now.. I dont have much of a social life yet, been to busy tryin to find work..But I do need to get out there.
Sometimes I do feel lonely and would like to have someone lgbt to hang with you know...But I'll start writing or searching for jobs and volunteering and I start letting it go how I am feeling.
I have had a few friends say I need to get out and have a good time and just relax..But I feel if I relax to much that I might let a job pass me by.
I went to see a Peer counselor here at the lgbtq Identity house. He gave me lots to think about and a direction for a more of a regular counselor and maybe get on meds and definitely get back on my Ts. He said that was dangerous to go off of them and it could cause me a lot of harm if I dont start them again..Which I wouldnt have gone off of them before if I hadnt ran out of money..He says I am depressed and I should try to get on some kind of Disability just for awhile..For Gender Identity Disorder..
So starting on the 31st I have a appt at a place called Callen-Lorde, Its suppose to be a very good place. I am hoping so. I really need it.
Even though I am healthier then I have been in a very long time, Lost lots of weight..and even got a tan..My heart is still heavy and I really need to some help..And I need a life lol
I told my mom I was staying here in NY and she pretty much said.."I love you but you will have to live with what you have done" I cant expect much from her.
I do miss my family back in Indiana but wouldnt trade this for nothing..I love it here..And I am glad that I made the leap.

The_Lady_Snow · 07-21-2012, 06:28 PM

Dude you're in NYC save up some cab, cover, beer, and tip $$ find a queer bar and go DANCING!!

It's NYC, have fun there's tons to do!!

Kent · 07-21-2012, 07:17 PM

Taylor hang in there. When things seem to be getting tougher and harder to deal with, this is when you are getting closer to a break through.

Nadeest · 07-22-2012, 06:59 AM

Hang in there, Taylor. You can do this. I agree with the counselor, getting back on T is important for you. I think that it will help you enormously, emotionally, as it will help you feel that you are making progress. It was the same way for me, when I was finally able to get laser to help clear my facial hairs. Things feel so much better for me, now, since I got that done.

theoddz · 07-22-2012, 07:46 AM

Taylor, so many really good suggestions here!! Nadeest is so right here about doing all you can to get back on T as soon as you can. Did you know that T has antidepressant effects....and not just psychological ones?? It also can make you feel more energetic and more "focused", mentally. These are even more important to you now.

Snowy also has a very important suggestion, too, about getting out and meeting people. Networking is a seriously imporant tool for getting a job these days. Do everything you can to meet as many people as you can and let them know you're looking for work. Also, are you a Veteran?? There are a LOT of new programs out there to help put Vets back to work. If you want more info on this, PM me.

Lastly, hang in there and keep your faith up. Don't allow the small stuff to sidetrack you from the task at hand. You only have ONE thing that you ever have to do in life and that is...SURVIVE. Eerything else is incidental.

Take care, best of luck and keep stirring!!

Sorry for the typos here....I'm on my Blackberry.

Theo

DMW · 08-06-2012, 10:24 PM

Hey Talyor Man, sounds like you are making progress. That is a good thing. I have been in the situation you are in...more than once. Still have learning to do. UnfortuNotly.

NYC is a good city to be in. Got a great Dr. (general practitioner), i could recommend. Moving away from family kinda puts a guilt on ya. Feel responsible and all that. And then there are a bunch of new added pressures along with the move.
Moving is one of the most stressful things for people. So, that is going to be a normal feeling.You gotta try and let the that go and focus on a bit at a time. Like the Oddz said... the one thing we gotta do is survive first.

Oh, i worried about spending my money on T too, cause i didn't have a job, (so, i was like..i don't have to have this to survive)... and i waited... Bad decision. I shoulda just used my damn credit card. Don't put it off like i did.
Sounds like you have other medications that are probably more important for you than T. Please go to someone to get those. I hope you already did.

Pardon me for saying this, here, in public...but, your Mother stating that this is "something you've done." Is not the correct thing to say to you in this context. You have chosen this as a positive for you in your life. She needs to choose to not blame you... as if ,taking care of yourself is something shameful or wrong or bad. For myself, it wasn't a choice to transition...it was a necessity.
She is probably sad that you are gone. That isn't your fault. It isn't about blame.

Some really great advice here from the others. Nice reminder for me too.
I am glad that you are happy about the move. I am glad you love it there.
I hope you got a job. Or, get one in time. Oh, make sure you have someone look over your reSUME...ResZOOOOMe and cover letter... for typos and for good input.

Later and
Keep the Faith

Linus · 08-06-2012, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TaylorMade

Hi everyone..been a while sense I wrote in here so I figured I would catch you all up.
Things are going rather well here, still loving it. Still looking for work. Sadly you would think this city would have a lot, but I have put in so many applications and sent out a lot of resume's that I still have not heard nothing back.
I am staying with a friend of a friends right now.. I dont have much of a social life yet, been to busy tryin to find work..But I do need to get out there.
Sometimes I do feel lonely and would like to have someone lgbt to hang with you know...But I'll start writing or searching for jobs and volunteering and I start letting it go how I am feeling.
I have had a few friends say I need to get out and have a good time and just relax..But I feel if I relax to much that I might let a job pass me by.
I went to see a Peer counselor here at the lgbtq Identity house. He gave me lots to think about and a direction for a more of a regular counselor and maybe get on meds and definitely get back on my Ts. He said that was dangerous to go off of them and it could cause me a lot of harm if I dont start them again..Which I wouldnt have gone off of them before if I hadnt ran out of money..He says I am depressed and I should try to get on some kind of Disability just for awhile..For Gender Identity Disorder..
So starting on the 31st I have a appt at a place called Callen-Lorde, Its suppose to be a very good place. I am hoping so. I really need it.
Even though I am healthier then I have been in a very long time, Lost lots of weight..and even got a tan..My heart is still heavy and I really need to some help..And I need a life lol
I told my mom I was staying here in NY and she pretty much said.."I love you but you will have to live with what you have done" I cant expect much from her.
I do miss my family back in Indiana but wouldnt trade this for nothing..I love it here..And I am glad that I made the leap.

Taylor,

As someone who started transitioning while in NYC, I highly recommend Callen Lorde. They were very supportive of me and helped a lot along the way. Also you may want to check out the Gender Identity Project Masculine Group (they usually meet weekly for about 12-14 weeks per quarter). It's free (although donations of any kind are welcomed) and it's a great place to find support and network.

DMW · 08-06-2012, 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Linus

Taylor,

As someone who started transitioning while in NYC, I highly recommend Callen Lorde. They were very supportive of me and helped a lot along the way. Also you may want to check out the Gender Identity Project Masculine Group (they usually meet weekly for about 12-14 weeks per quarter). It's free (although donations of any kind are welcomed) and it's a great place to find support and network.

That is good news. The Dr. that i would referr you to is in NYC. He is excellent.I actually referred L. Fineberg to him. So, the Callen Lorde group, and the place Linus mentioned...along with the good news... those groups probably know of him too. If not, you have my email, I will call him for you. I could probably get you into him.

Cheers,
DMW

QueenofSmirks · 08-06-2012, 10:57 PM

Hi Taylor,

I moved to NYC from Colorado back in 2001, and I went through some of what you're going through, and a lot of other stuff on top of that. Do yourself a favor, take the time to get out and do something enjoyable. Even if it's only 1 hour out of your week, do it, every week if not more often. You're not going to miss a job opportunity at 9pm at night on a Saturday. NYC can be very lonely without friends - go start making some.

07-21-2012, 06:23 PM	#1
TaylorMade Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Taylor Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Taken Join Date: May 2012 Location: Indiana Posts: 8 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 25 Thanked 42 Times in 8 Posts Rep Power: 0	Been in NYC for a month now.. Hi everyone..been a while sense I wrote in here so I figured I would catch you all up. Things are going rather well here, still loving it. Still looking for work. Sadly you would think this city would have a lot, but I have put in so many applications and sent out a lot of resume's that I still have not heard nothing back. I am staying with a friend of a friends right now.. I dont have much of a social life yet, been to busy tryin to find work..But I do need to get out there. Sometimes I do feel lonely and would like to have someone lgbt to hang with you know...But I'll start writing or searching for jobs and volunteering and I start letting it go how I am feeling. I have had a few friends say I need to get out and have a good time and just relax..But I feel if I relax to much that I might let a job pass me by. I went to see a Peer counselor here at the lgbtq Identity house. He gave me lots to think about and a direction for a more of a regular counselor and maybe get on meds and definitely get back on my Ts. He said that was dangerous to go off of them and it could cause me a lot of harm if I dont start them again..Which I wouldnt have gone off of them before if I hadnt ran out of money..He says I am depressed and I should try to get on some kind of Disability just for awhile..For Gender Identity Disorder.. So starting on the 31st I have a appt at a place called Callen-Lorde, Its suppose to be a very good place. I am hoping so. I really need it. Even though I am healthier then I have been in a very long time, Lost lots of weight..and even got a tan..My heart is still heavy and I really need to some help..And I need a life lol I told my mom I was staying here in NY and she pretty much said.."I love you but you will have to live with what you have done" I cant expect much from her. I do miss my family back in Indiana but wouldnt trade this for nothing..I love it here..And I am glad that I made the leap. __________________ "Its not what they call you, its what you answer to"

07-21-2012, 06:28 PM	#2
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,119 Times in 15,678 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	Times Square, The Village, Coffee Shops Dude you're in NYC save up some cab, cover, beer, and tip $$ find a queer bar and go DANCING!! It's NYC, have fun there's tons to do!! __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

07-21-2012, 07:17 PM	#3
Kent Member How Do You Identify?: Male Relationship Status: Single Tournaments Won: 2 Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: TX Posts: 1,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,564 Thanked 2,058 Times in 720 Posts Rep Power: 19241325	Taylor hang in there. When things seem to be getting tougher and harder to deal with, this is when you are getting closer to a break through. __________________ Kent

07-22-2012, 07:46 AM	#5
theoddz Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Old Poop Preferred Pronoun?: Mr. Beast Relationship Status: Happily Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Central Texas Posts: 3,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,793 Thanked 9,864 Times in 2,473 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Taylor, so many really good suggestions here!! Nadeest is so right here about doing all you can to get back on T as soon as you can. Did you know that T has antidepressant effects....and not just psychological ones?? It also can make you feel more energetic and more "focused", mentally. These are even more important to you now. Snowy also has a very important suggestion, too, about getting out and meeting people. Networking is a seriously imporant tool for getting a job these days. Do everything you can to meet as many people as you can and let them know you're looking for work. Also, are you a Veteran?? There are a LOT of new programs out there to help put Vets back to work. If you want more info on this, PM me. Lastly, hang in there and keep your faith up. Don't allow the small stuff to sidetrack you from the task at hand. You only have ONE thing that you ever have to do in life and that is...SURVIVE. Eerything else is incidental. Take care, best of luck and keep stirring!! Sorry for the typos here....I'm on my Blackberry. Theo __________________ *"All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."* -- J. R. R. Tolkien

08-06-2012, 10:24 PM	#6
DMW Member How Do You Identify?: FTM/Male (Will 14) Relationship Status: Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012 Location: @ Posts: 784 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,256 Thanked 1,861 Times in 614 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	Hey Talyor Man, sounds like you are making progress. That is a good thing. I have been in the situation you are in...more than once. Still have learning to do. UnfortuNotly. NYC is a good city to be in. Got a great Dr. (general practitioner), i could recommend. Moving away from family kinda puts a guilt on ya. Feel responsible and all that. And then there are a bunch of new added pressures along with the move. Moving is one of the most stressful things for people. So, that is going to be a normal feeling.You gotta try and let the that go and focus on a bit at a time. Like the Oddz said... the one thing we gotta do is survive first. Oh, i worried about spending my money on T too, cause i didn't have a job, (so, i was like..i don't have to have this to survive)... and i waited... Bad decision. I shoulda just used my damn credit card. Don't put it off like i did. Sounds like you have other medications that are probably more important for you than T. Please go to someone to get those. I hope you already did. Pardon me for saying this, here, in public...but, your Mother stating that this is "something you've done." Is not the correct thing to say to you in this context. You have chosen this as a positive for you in your life. She needs to choose to not blame you... as if ,taking care of yourself is something shameful or wrong or bad. For myself, it wasn't a choice to transition...it was a necessity. She is probably sad that you are gone. That isn't your fault. It isn't about blame. Some really great advice here from the others. Nice reminder for me too. I am glad that you are happy about the move. I am glad you love it there. I hope you got a job. Or, get one in time. Oh, make sure you have someone look over your reSUME...ResZOOOOMe and cover letter... for typos and for good input. Later and Keep the Faith Last edited by DMW; 08-06-2012 at 10:27 PM.

07-22-2012, 06:59 AM	#4
Nadeest Member How Do You Identify?: as myself Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Leesburg, FL Posts: 595 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,876 Thanked 2,118 Times in 501 Posts Rep Power: 17077996	Hang in there, Taylor. You can do this. I agree with the counselor, getting back on T is important for you. I think that it will help you enormously, emotionally, as it will help you feel that you are making progress. It was the same way for me, when I was finally able to get laser to help clear my facial hairs. Things feel so much better for me, now, since I got that done.

08-06-2012, 10:57 PM	#9
QueenofSmirks Member How Do You Identify?: Just Me Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: Busy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Phoenix - Valley of the Sun Posts: 1,429 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,010 Thanked 2,920 Times in 879 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Hi Taylor, I moved to NYC from Colorado back in 2001, and I went through some of what you're going through, and a lot of other stuff on top of that. Do yourself a favor, take the time to get out and do something enjoyable. Even if it's only 1 hour out of your week, do it, every week if not more often. You're not going to miss a job opportunity at 9pm at night on a Saturday. NYC can be very lonely without friends - go start making some. __________________ Stephanie "There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way." Christopher Morley