Trans and Relationship's
 

I don't think I've ever been bashed because of dating within the community but have been told I'm a traitor to the community (and, from what I inferred, a traitor to women) for transitioning.

But like some of the other comments above, I do not feel comfortable outside the community. It's not where I feel at home. The straight/heteronormative world isn't mine. I'm lucky to have a partner who is queer in who she dates.

If I was to take on another partner (we maintain a poly outlook on life) I would likely look for another queer partner rather than a straight women.

And to think

I wondered if I could/should participate in the thread, since I'm not single and the question was posed to single transmen


Dylan

Ok so i should have left out "single" my mistake.

I cannot speak for anyone except myself, i date and have relationships with femme's because that is who i am attracted to. High Maintenance, girlie girl type women.

Opposing the question to dating within the community, lol i usually get told to leave the "lesbian" community alone and go out and find a straight woman.

Then im told that i "look" too male. So i best get moving on.

I chuckle to myself, cause these are tweeners that have issues and like to cause drama.

I just want to live my life, keep friends and tread lightly with the community.

June,

Fragile is definitely not a word I would use to describe you.

I just find it interesting that out of nine posts on a question posed to transmen in a trans thread, three of the responses are by cispeople, and two of the posts are asking for explanations while the other one talks about how cispeople feel about trans people in queer space.


It's Just Ironic To Me Especially When Added To The Fact That I Asked The OP If It Would Be Out Of Line If I (as a coupled transperson) Was Welcome To Post,
Dylan

Im sorry for singling out transguys, it was not my intention.

And this is a community and EVERYONE is welcome in this conversation

Dylan be nice lol

sometimes threads heat up, sometimes they die off. im sick of having this conversation with a one sided lesbian that is NOT on the planet but texts me off the wall cause i was interested in HER ex. and i just need input here.

thread is open to EVERYONE. keep it clean

"HowSoonIsNow" i like snarkieness. bring it on. :)

Gosh Sam, block her, no one needs that kind of negativity in their life!

You can post here anytime. i like the difference of opinions, that is what makes us unique.

i know you were sincere, i just went on with the snark comment. im sorry. didnt mean to offend you

ditto. this seems to be my niche — the availability of transensual femmes who I find very attractive. It;s just too bad it'll never happen. (for reasons)

I find it interesting that trans people are not only told they are not part of the glbTq community, but they're also then told how to act/acceptable terms/whom they may partner with/etc when they are in the glbTq

Yet the same 'rules' are not expected when the glbq's are in the T community

This isn't a retort towards you June...honest. I'm talking about the OP.

I have definitely been told I whom I 'should' be dating. We have all been told how we 'should' act in this community. We've all seen those who don't 'behave' excommunicated. It's just funny to me that trans ppl are often seen as 'guests' of the glbq community who can be easily discarded if they don't abide by the 'rules' even though we've helped the glbq community forever. Yet never once have I seen a cis glbq ask about their behavior when in T space...it's almost just an assumption that glbq's 'should' be welcome.

It's just funny to me


In A Not HaHa Way,
Dylan

As a transguy, I have insecurities about being part of this community. In many ways I do feel comfortable with you guys and gals in a way I don't feel at all comfortable in the cis/straight world. I consider myself queer, because my primary attraction is to femmes, and I am not at home in the cis/straight world. I love the LGBTQ community.

My insecurities are about how I fit into the butch-femme community as a transguy. Will anyone be interested in me once the T that I am on has changed my body? Will anyone still see me as a legitimate member here? Most importantly, will people here still see ME, and not just my body? I am on disability. I live out in the middle of a rural small town area. I have issues with anxiety and panic disorder. There are plenty of reasons for femmes to not have any interest in me. I just hope that my trans status isn't one of them.

All that being said, only once so far have I pursued a femme who told me no, and it was because she wanted to be with a woman. No one has called me traitor or said I wasn't welcome here. I just worry that it might happen, cause I have heard of guys being treated that way. I think it is sad and hurtful.

And by the way, I am attracted to femmes because they are powerful, strong women who embody femininity and courage and heart. They are bold, unapologetic, and not afraid to stand up and be proud of who they are and who they love. No one else touches my heart and heats my desires like a femme.

Thanks for starting this thread Sam.

Perhaps this may be a worthwhile separate thread to start, Dylan.