Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - Showing scars: what are your relationship fears?

Kätzchen · 09-26-2016, 06:10 PM

I can totally relate to the term (s) describing "relationship PTSD (R-ptsd)."

I think that I still experience R-ptsd to an certain degree, but I think it's more like an acute awareness of things I won't tolerate or won't allow to have any place in my life.

Things that trigger my own type of R-ptsd are items related to potential dates or person's of interest who exhibit what I call exceptionally revolting behaviors: Behaviors exhibited which denote anything typically associated with addiction or control issues. For example.... manipulation, overt or covert deception, or anything that even has a whiff of 'red flag' status will trigger me to take flight and run in the opposite direction. I can certainly relate to Cheryl and cupcakes experiences in life.

There's this social expression that I whole heartedly believe in.... the saying about knowing a great love and that once you've experienced something so incredibly wonderful: Like, it's not something that is replicated in the same way, ever again, because that particular type of relationship experience is unique to the two people who shared that special love, in that particular time and space in which it developed.

I'd also like to say that I've been a member in this community for a number of years, ss well as a member in the prior dash community, because it's a place where I can share facets of my life, the way i think ...with other members... so we can communally explore our way of thinking or by private self reflection or by adopting ideas or rejecting ideas or by tempering our personal cosmos with ways to process our ideas and/or beliefs. Ideally, that's why I've been part of this online community.

I'm not here to find anyone or any some-such thing. If I want to date, there is plenty of opportunity among my own small groups of friendships (here at home) to do such a thing. I've accepted dates from people I've known for a really long time. Conversely, I rarely accept an date with anyone I hardly know.... if ever, nowadays.

But I so relate to the relationship PTSD dilemma. I'm always interviewing potential dates. I guess one could say I'm typically in "interview mode" -- mostly because of my extensive life experience in casually interviewing people, seeking information to help identify the exact nature of what end result they're after (professional trade)... Or by interviewing people to add toward a body of evidence (for example, an scholarly study).

I am compelled to add toward this particular sphere of ideas, as it relates to relationship PTSD, because I think there's an awful lot of us out there who share similar experience (s) in life.

I think it's safe to say that I definitely have an developed sense of acute awareness of relationship PTSD. It's a feral thing, in many ways, for me.

And, I'm okay with that. I don't consider my acute awareness as fear of .... anything. If anything, it just helps me to examine my own priorities and to know that it's healthy to know what works for me, to ensure my own sense of safety, my own sense of pleasure, my own sense of sexuality or any number of things I dwell upon in my own private cosmos.

09-26-2016, 06:10 PM	#91
Kätzchen Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, please. Join Date: May 2010 Location: Near beautiful rivers and snowy mountains Posts: 16,027 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,166 Thanked 33,491 Times in 10,626 Posts Rep Power: 21474868	I can totally relate to the term (s) describing "relationship PTSD (R-ptsd)." I think that I still experience R-ptsd to an certain degree, but I think it's more like an acute awareness of things I won't tolerate or won't allow to have any place in my life. Things that trigger my own type of R-ptsd are items related to potential dates or person's of interest who exhibit what I call exceptionally revolting behaviors: Behaviors exhibited which denote anything typically associated with addiction or control issues. For example.... manipulation, overt or covert deception, or anything that even has a whiff of 'red flag' status will trigger me to take flight and run in the opposite direction. I can certainly relate to Cheryl and cupcakes experiences in life. There's this social expression that I whole heartedly believe in.... the saying about knowing a great love and that once you've experienced something so incredibly wonderful: Like, it's not something that is replicated in the same way, ever again, because that particular type of relationship experience is unique to the two people who shared that special love, in that particular time and space in which it developed. I'd also like to say that I've been a member in this community for a number of years, ss well as a member in the prior dash community, because it's a place where I can share facets of my life, the way i think ...with other members... so we can communally explore our way of thinking or by private self reflection or by adopting ideas or rejecting ideas or by tempering our personal cosmos with ways to process our ideas and/or beliefs. Ideally, that's why I've been part of this online community. I'm not here to find anyone or any some-such thing. If I want to date, there is plenty of opportunity among my own small groups of friendships (here at home) to do such a thing. I've accepted dates from people I've known for a really long time. Conversely, I rarely accept an date with anyone I hardly know.... if ever, nowadays. But I so relate to the relationship PTSD dilemma. I'm always interviewing potential dates. I guess one could say I'm typically in "interview mode" -- mostly because of my extensive life experience in casually interviewing people, seeking information to help identify the exact nature of what end result they're after (professional trade)... Or by interviewing people to add toward a body of evidence (for example, an scholarly study). I am compelled to add toward this particular sphere of ideas, as it relates to relationship PTSD, because I think there's an awful lot of us out there who share similar experience (s) in life. I think it's safe to say that I definitely have an developed sense of acute awareness of relationship PTSD. It's a feral thing, in many ways, for me. And, I'm okay with that. I don't consider my acute awareness as fear of .... anything. If anything, it just helps me to examine my own priorities and to know that it's healthy to know what works for me, to ensure my own sense of safety, my own sense of pleasure, my own sense of sexuality or any number of things I dwell upon in my own private cosmos.