[SleepyButch]

Interesting questions. For me when I die, I don't think that I will care much about what I am buried in even though I would prefer to be in a nice suit. My family knows my preferences and I seriously doubt they would put me in a dress but I do understand some people don't have those kind of loved ones.

I know a lot of people make burial arrangements before they ever plan to leave this earth. That would be an option. Go and talk to a funeral director. Express your wishes. Get that all set up down to what you want to wear.

I personally know a funeral director who teaches students and one of the messages she is trying to convey to them is that funerals should be a celebration of the deceased's life and not just for those that are left behind. This means that if someone wants to wear a suit or a dress, that is there option. If someone wants to play heavy metal music at their funeral even if there family objects, that is what should happen. I hope that for all of our sakes that this is the way of the future.


As far as being in a hospital, a lot of people feel like they lose their dignity during those times, not just Butches but everyone. People being made to wear gowns where their asses are hanging out. Having a catheter in, being poked and prodded at what seems like every second. It's never easy being sick and having to deal with this as well makes it that much worse.

Being a nurse myself I would suggest to just find a nurse/someone you trust and tell her/him your wishes. Hey, I prefer to wear my boxers. Hey, I don't want all of these people around when I'm being examined. It makes me uncomfortable. It is your prerogative to ask. A lot of times, hospitals have pants that you can wear instead of those awful gowns. Ask for them. The worse that could happen is they can say no. Someone around there has to be a patient advocate. All nurses should be even though I know that's not the case. They are all concentrating on getting you over your sickness and not thinking about the fact that you might be uncomfortable. Remind them.

Anyway, good luck with whatever you are going through.