Quote:
Originally Posted by honeybarbara
1) without talking about yourself personally, why do you think it is that in butch-femme culture in north america (cause I have no idea about elsewhere) there is a decidedly un-even ratio of feminine giving up their name and butches giving theirs in terms of marriage - why do you think that this ratio is so marked?
2) without talking about yourself personally, what do you think could be various contributing ideas to this trend?
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In North America, the social/cultural norm is for the woman to take the man's name in marriage.
Those mores/norms are embedded to some degree in all of us. I beleive each of us carries the social/cultural norms we were raised with whether or not we like them and whether or not we even know it.
The name taking norm is slowly changing, but the ratio by far is still the
woman taking the
man's name.
I don't think this is limited to B/F relationships. What I see is the dominant partner's name becomes the family name. When the dominant partner is femme, it can raise eyebrows, but not really.
This leads to the other cultural/societal norm that butch=dominant partner... And that's a whole other thread.
FTR I know many Femme-led relationships, but the question is broader than my personal circle of friends.