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|  02-04-2012, 11:53 AM | #1 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: Girlie with a touch of bossy Preferred Pronoun?: She, but not hung up on the details Relationship Status: Parenting our furry family with SmoothButch  Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Washington DC 
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	Rep Power: 4366972            |  Non-monogamy survey for psych class - will you help? 
			
			Hi everyone! I am eyeball deep in finishing up my degree and I am required to conduct a research experiment for my psychology class. I have selected the issue of monogamy/nonmonogamy among people in committed relationships. I know there is a wonderful array of ideas and practices amongst the gracious members here, so I wanted to reach out. The questions I am seeking answers to are listed below. Or, if you'd like to post anonymously, I also have an online survey at: http://FreeOnlineSurveys.com/renders...r1ufr1y1026785 
 Looking forward to a milieu of experiences and responses. Thank you! Laerkin | 
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|  02-04-2012, 12:06 PM | #2 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: FTM Preferred Pronoun?: guy ones Relationship Status: ... Join Date: May 2011 Location: chillin' in FL 
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			I am single and not in a committed long term relationship at the moment but would like to be in the near future as I'm 36 and would like a mate to spend my life with. I am Trans  . I would not be interested in open relationships anymore as I noted above I am now searching for one mate long term and committed. Thanks for allowing us to be a part of your research. If you can let us know your findings. | 
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|  02-04-2012, 12:47 PM | #3 | 
| Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches 
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			did survey on the link you posted...hope it helps...thanks, Laerkin..Clay
		 
				__________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault | 
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|  02-04-2012, 12:48 PM | #4 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: BBW. Unique femininity that does not encompass the western paradigm. Preferred Pronoun?: Anything Respectful! Relationship Status: Single, Happy, not Desparate or Looking, but Open to Possibilities... Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Europe and Aotearoa on a 5:2 ratio. 
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			1.	Are you in a committed, long-term relationship?  Dating. 2. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Queer, gay, lesbian. 3. Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 30-49 4. Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Femme 5. If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? No! 6. If so, why? If not, why not? I’m strictly a one woman Femme. I believe in devoting myself to my long term partner in many ways; as her best friend, her lover, her confident and her companion. For me, when in a long term relationship, sex is an expression of our love for each; an intimate bond. Good luck with completing your degree. Please let us know how you get on.  
				__________________ What will make the difference to me is your strength of character and what's in your heart... | 
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|  02-04-2012, 01:50 PM | #5 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: Girlie with a touch of bossy Preferred Pronoun?: She, but not hung up on the details Relationship Status: Parenting our furry family with SmoothButch  Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Washington DC 
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			Thank you to everyone for the responses! This is helping tremendously. Keep 'em coming! Laerkin | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:00 PM | #6 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: Stonefemme lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: I'm a woman. Behave accordingly. Relationship Status: Single, not looking. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: NYC 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship? Dating. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Lesbian Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 49 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Female If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? Yes. She isn't likely to become my girlfriend or partner if she isn't nonmonogamous, or unless she has no problem with me being nonmonogamous. If so, why? If not, why not? I'm not wired for monogamy, and I'm not interested in shoe-horning myself into a restricted relationship which wouldn't work for me. I'm always scrupulously honest, and expect the same of my girlfriends/partners. 
				__________________ Cheryl | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:04 PM | #7 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: m'lady Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NJ 
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			I did the online survey...but I think I screwed up.  I read the "How do you identify" question as "How does your partner identify" (don't ask me why...I am blaming it on lack of sleep. lol).  I identify as femme...my partner is a male-identified butch.  I hope this doesn't screw up the survey.    
				__________________   Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there ~ Rumi | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:13 PM | #8 | |
| ☆ the stars are aligned ☆ How Do You Identify?: one queer mama Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: married to my Boo Daddy <3 Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: nor cal 
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	Rep Power: 21474854            |   Quote: 
 I identify as a lesbian. I am 24 years old. I identify as a femme. I am monogamous, and even if my partner was supportive of me being intimate with others, I would not. I do not find the idea appealing, nor do I have any desire to explore. In the past, I have tried having a primary relationship while seeing others, and it did not work out. I am possessive I suppose, for lack of better word, and do not want to share or be shared. I feel that it would lessen the bond I have with my partner, and it would make me resentful. | |
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|  02-04-2012, 02:29 PM | #9 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Ol butch bones. Preferred Pronoun?: Old thing Relationship Status: Too old to play. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: :rolleyes: 
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			I am in a committed thirty year marriage. I identify as Stone-Butch. I am 57 years old. My wife and I both come from families where divorce and polygamy are unheard of, and the joys and sorrows of unconditional love are understood. We raised a child together and wanted to uphold these traditional values we were raised with. For us monogamy works. It makes us happy, and I believe marriage is GREAT! 
				__________________ 1 Kings 19:12 | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:35 PM | #10 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Goddess Relationship Status: Completely in love Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Southern Virginia 
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			I am single I am queer I am fine wine  I am on the fence with monogamy. I think I could be poly under the right circumstances where there was a spiritual foundation and within BDSM, however once I connect with someone in a certain D/s- BF dynamic I am passionately enthralled and can't see anyone else. But until that happens I'm open for almost anything! 
				__________________ You either like me or you don't. It took me Twenty-something years to learn how to love myself, I don't have that kinda time to convince somebody else. ~ Daniel Franzese | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:40 PM | #11 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer..femme.. .babygirl...girl Preferred Pronoun?: Female Ones... Relationship Status: Enjoying life but ready to meet someone Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Portland Oregon 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship? yes I am in a committed long term relationship and am engaged to my  partner. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other?queer Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 30-49 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? femme If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? Yes, we have an open relationship and have discussed either adding a third to our relationship and/or seeking another that compliments our relationship. We would remain the primary relationship. If so, why? If not, why not? We both feel that one person can not meet every need in a person. If there happens to be someone else who meets needs not met in the current relationship then we both are open to that. For example, we are in a D/s relationship. I also have a babygirl side and I am open to accepting another as my Daddy if the right person were to come along. We just no longer fit both categories I prefer D/s with him. 
				__________________ Previously known as MidnightBlueEyes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ http://gailsforum.files.wordpress.co...-psd340941.png Last edited by WingsOnFire; 02-04-2012 at 02:44 PM. Reason: color issue | 
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|  02-04-2012, 02:52 PM | #12 | 
| Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship?  Yes Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Queer Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 30-49 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Femme If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? If so, why? If not, why not? We are a poly household of 3, i am the second wife in the house.  , there are no plans for dating outside of our household, happy household | 
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|  02-04-2012, 03:14 PM | #13 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: *** Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: *** 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship?     Yes Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? lesbian Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 53 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? female and femme If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? This assumes that there is a dyad, that all poly is dyad based. This is a pet peeve of mine, that people make the assumption that poly is just having someone on the side. i am the sub of a couple. i am not partnered with either. They are partnered with one another. If so, why? If not, why not? | 
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|  02-04-2012, 03:43 PM | #14 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: queer stone femme shark baby girl Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, little one Relationship Status: dating myself.  Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: dallas, tx 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship? yes, i'm in two actually. one for 6 years, the other for a year. we make life decisions together and are in the process of moving in together. if we could, we'd be married  we've had non-legally-binding commitments to one another but even that is technically illegal, especially if you're living together. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? queer Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 18-29 (i'm 24) Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? femme If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? If so, why? If not, why not? they are and i do  right now i'm not necessarily seeking out other sexual partners (i wasn't actually when i met my second long-term partner either, although i'd been in other relationships before that) but i don't discount new possibilities, either. both of my partners are monogamous but they're very accepting of each other and of the fact that i am polyamorous. if they wanted to seek other relationships i'd be happy for them. i know a lot of people have "primary" and "secondary" relationships but that configuration has never worked for me - no one relationship is more important than any other, although there has to be a certain level of long-term commitment to make life decisions or move in with someone. but neither of my partners is "primary." | 
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|  02-04-2012, 03:43 PM | #15 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: queer stone femme shark baby girl Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, little one Relationship Status: dating myself.  Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: dallas, tx 
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|  02-04-2012, 03:53 PM | #16 | 
| Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... 
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			Married Queer Fifty Femme No Not wired to share | 
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|  02-04-2012, 05:16 PM | #17 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: *Fierce Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Singular Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Southwest 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship? No. Single. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Queer Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 50 year old fine wine  Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Femme If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? If so, why? If not, why not? Monogamy is what works for me. If I were in a relationship, I would not be interested in exploring other relationships outside of the one I was in. | 
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|  02-04-2012, 10:12 PM | #18 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: Girlie with a touch of bossy Preferred Pronoun?: She, but not hung up on the details Relationship Status: Parenting our furry family with SmoothButch  Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Washington DC 
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			Thanks for all of the feedback and education, everyone! I love it.    | 
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|  02-04-2012, 11:36 PM | #19 | 
| Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Preferred Pronoun?: . Relationship Status: . Join Date: May 2010 Location: . 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship?  Yes Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Queer Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 18-29 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Transgendered If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? Yes If so, why? If not, why not? We're already in an open relationship. I can't fulfill every need of hers, nor she mine. It's not fair to expect one person to "be all" for another. It's simply not possible. I want the "whole" to be happy. If that means more than one person, so be it. | 
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|  02-04-2012, 11:36 PM | #20 | 
| Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi 
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			Are you in a committed, long-term relationship?  No. Do you identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, queer, or other? Lesbian. Are you 18-29, 30-49, or aged like a nice wine? 45 Do you identify as male, female, butch, femme, transgendered, or other? Female. If your spouse/partner would be supportive and accepting of the idea, would you (do you) explore open relationships/sex outside your primary relationship? No. If so, why? If not, why not? o firecracker! no! i can't focus on but one thing at a time lol. the idea of being in love is total tunnel vision. she's the only one for me. i want her to be my only need. it's she and i or nothing. i get jealous. and i want her to be. (in a healthy way.) the union of 2 people is a vow, a promise. the very core of a relationship is not sex. it's devotion, ... in my case, it's singular. i don't have to be committed to be in love. and i can be committed and not be in love. both are fine. sometimes a relationship is companionship or security, etc ... , not being in love. i've thought about, can someone be in love with two people at once? i think it can happen, ... to a certain degree. but i sure wouldn't want to be that someone. thank you, Laerkin. hope all goes great. | 
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