Abuse in butch-femme relationships

Lady_Di · 03-30-2012, 11:24 AM

First of all kudos for you for sharing, that was very brave of you. And that is the beginning of your healing journey. ((((((dancer)))))

Love never dies, but it can be toxic nonetheless. Sometimes it may not work out. You owe it to yourself and your family, past present and future family to take care of yourself. For a change of pace...

There are many kinds of abuse in this big ole world. Live and learn, get the help, there is a lot out there. Access those resources which abound in pretty much every community, unless you are in Timbuktwo, though they probably have em too.

Great suggestions here. All I can say is nothing is ever black and white. The oddest thing about abusers is they can come off to the outside world as the most polite and gracious people on earth, they can seem to be very loving people. I am speaking from the experiences of those I have met that have been incarcerated for their brutal crimes. As a nurse we get to interact with these folks and it is unnerving that they are often times the easiest of our patient load. Down right respectful to us for the most part. Though again, it is not black and white.

I have rarely seen an abuser change it's spots. But I do think people can change, including you. And ultimately that is who you are responsible to and for. Change must happen. In fact if you are not changing, growing... you are stagnating and that is akin to death.

Live. It is a choice as to how you want to do that, who you want to have in your life, what sort of home, career, family you will have. What vocations, passions you will persue and keeping those around you who support you in whatever your endeavors may be.

Be strong and know you can get thru this. You have a ton of support here and in your real life community, I am quite certain of that.

Lean on us, continue to vent, problem solve, and continue this amazing journey of self discovery. Remember that sometimes from our pain, comes our finest triumphs, our biggest lessons.

Take Care,
Di

03-30-2012, 11:24 AM	#11
Lady_Di Member How Do You Identify?: Homo sapien Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Home Posts: 353 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,486 Thanked 1,486 Times in 315 Posts Rep Power: 16304880	First of all kudos for you for sharing, that was very brave of you. And that is the beginning of your healing journey. ((((((dancer))))) Love never dies, but it can be toxic nonetheless. Sometimes it may not work out. You owe it to yourself and your family, past present and future family to take care of yourself. For a change of pace... There are many kinds of abuse in this big ole world. Live and learn, get the help, there is a lot out there. Access those resources which abound in pretty much every community, unless you are in Timbuktwo, though they probably have em too. Great suggestions here. All I can say is nothing is ever black and white. The oddest thing about abusers is they can come off to the outside world as the most polite and gracious people on earth, they can seem to be very loving people. I am speaking from the experiences of those I have met that have been incarcerated for their brutal crimes. As a nurse we get to interact with these folks and it is unnerving that they are often times the easiest of our patient load. Down right respectful to us for the most part. Though again, it is not black and white. I have rarely seen an abuser change it's spots. But I do think people can change, including you. And ultimately that is who you are responsible to and for. Change must happen. In fact if you are not changing, growing... you are stagnating and that is akin to death. Live. It is a choice as to how you want to do that, who you want to have in your life, what sort of home, career, family you will have. What vocations, passions you will persue and keeping those around you who support you in whatever your endeavors may be. Be strong and know you can get thru this. You have a ton of support here and in your real life community, I am quite certain of that. Lean on us, continue to vent, problem solve, and continue this amazing journey of self discovery. Remember that sometimes from our pain, comes our finest triumphs, our biggest lessons. Take Care, Di