Pressurised to transition.

[Linus]

If they are someone in a larger city it may benefit them, if they are considering to transition, to see about joining a local trans support group. I found, at least in NYC at the LGBT Center, that many of the trans guys I met were young (and a few too many homeless). These support groups can often steer younger folks to medical support at low to no cost. At the same time these groups allow them to ask the questions needed -- in a safe and supportive environment (regardless of their decision to transition or not). In the group I was I. A few butches and studs joined who were curious but decided that this wasn't the path for them.

I'm thankful for that group as it kept me sane, safe and made me realize I wasn't alone. There are times when I miss it. Anyways, I digress.

I truly believe that if someone is pressured or feeling pressured to transition, just providing the support for who they are is a good place to start. I also feel that allowing the questions to be asked is also helpful as is asking them the question of "do YOU feel that this is your path?". If they say yes, then get them to say why. The more they think about it and all that's involved, the more they may, hopefully, realize that this has to be something truly deep inside who they are and not just because others tell them or because they think it's the "natural way of things" or the "next step in butch evolution".

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by Linus

If they are someone in a larger city it may benefit them, if they are considering to transition, to see about joining a local trans support group. I found, at least in NYC at the LGBT Center, that many of the trans guys I met were young (and a few too many homeless). These support groups can often steer younger folks to medical support at low to no cost. At the same time these groups allow them to ask the questions needed -- in a safe and supportive environment (regardless of their decision to transition or not). In the group I was I. A few butches and studs joined who were curious but decided that this wasn't the path for them.

I'm thankful for that group as it kept me sane, safe and made me realize I wasn't alone. There are times when I miss it. Anyways, I digress.

I truly believe that if someone is pressured or feeling pressured to transition, just providing the support for who they are is a good place to start. I also feel that allowing the questions to be asked is also helpful as is asking them the question of "do YOU feel that this is your path?". If they say yes, then get them to say why. The more they think about it and all that's involved, the more they may, hopefully, realize that this has to be something truly deep inside who they are and not just because others tell them or because they think it's the "natural way of things" or the "next step in butch evolution".

Thanks, Linus- this is helpful. Really helpful. Where I live there are many organizations and groups available which is great. I do get concerned for folks that just live in small towns and it is next to impossible for them to get to larger metropolitian areas for support and medical treatment in figuring out if transitioning is right for them. Also, there are butch oriented groups available here that address our issues and provide support. Just the B-F orientation can be isolating for many of us.

I have often thought about how this very website is a resource for many that don't have much available to them where they live. In fact, I think the Planet serves many of us that are geographically isolated or physically disabled that share our narraitive. It is a vital part of the site.

Rather a unique bunch!

[dreadgeek]

Originally Posted by Linus

If they are someone in a larger city it may benefit them, if they are considering to transition, to see about joining a local trans support group. I found, at least in NYC at the LGBT Center, that many of the trans guys I met were young (and a few too many homeless). These support groups can often steer younger folks to medical support at low to no cost. At the same time these groups allow them to ask the questions needed -- in a safe and supportive environment (regardless of their decision to transition or not). In the group I was I. A few butches and studs joined who were curious but decided that this wasn't the path for them.

I'm thankful for that group as it kept me sane, safe and made me realize I wasn't alone. There are times when I miss it. Anyways, I digress.

I truly believe that if someone is pressured or feeling pressured to transition, just providing the support for who they are is a good place to start. I also feel that allowing the questions to be asked is also helpful as is asking them the question of "do YOU feel that this is your path?". If they say yes, then get them to say why. The more they think about it and all that's involved, the more they may, hopefully, realize that this has to be something truly deep inside who they are and not just because others tell them or because they think it's the "natural way of things" or the "next step in butch evolution".

Linus:

You capture so much of what I want to see. I understand that, for very good reasons, the community has adopted an idea that in order to support and love one another, we have to accept anything anyone does under almost any circumstances. Sometimes, though, the most loving thing one can do is say "have you thought this through?" There are, in my mind, an innumerable number of reasons NOT to transition, I can think of only a handful of reasons TO transition. I think we need to support one another in knowing the difference. Sometimes, that may entail going to entail supporting someone in the decision to transition. Other times, it may be supporting someone in the decision not to do so.

Cheers
Aj