Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

[Tommi]

Originally Posted by Debby

I am floored and heartbroken. The day after I had chemo and two days after our anniversary. He told his family, he can't be here and watch me die. I have invasive ductal carcinoma, stage 2B, triple negative and grade 3. I am not dying!
And no he hasn't been to mtgs lately. I know he has spoken with his sponsor.

((((((((Debby and your SO))))))))))))))
Amazing what dynamics come into play when we are members of this special club we did not ask to become members of.
Maybe this is his way of dealing with the pain YOU are going through. I know partners feel helpless and sometimes act out in the worst ways, and say things that need to be discussed. I know I can't change another's way of dealing with issues, but I know I have to take care of myself.

My best advice...Al Anon. There are gay meetings in some area's, and there are on-line meetings. It really is One Day at a Time.
http://webcache.googleusercontent.co...www.google.com

[mustangjeano]

Debby, I am so sorry to read that your guy is not there for you right now. Hopefully he will get some help and be back by your side. I was surprised to find out that this happens more frequently than I would have thought. I ended up going to a counselor who specializes in cancer patients in order to understand my ex and best friend who baled on me in the middle of my cancer treatment. Please ask your friends for ANYTHING you need---whether it is someone to take you to your treatments, or a shoulder to cry on, or someone to watch a funny movie together. Also. I found it really helpful to see a counselor who specialized in cancer patient's issues. Your guy should find someone to talk to about his feelings as well--a safe place where he can express his fears. Cancer affects the whole family. One thing I used to tell myself on the way to my chemo appointments was "It won't always be like this" ---my mantra
I will be sending lots of loving, healing energy to you and your guy.
Jeano

[deb_U_taunt]

Originally Posted by mustangjeano

Debby, I am so sorry to read that your guy is not there for you right now. Hopefully he will get some help and be back by your side. I was surprised to find out that this happens more frequently than I would have thought. I ended up going to a counselor who specializes in cancer patients in order to understand my ex and best friend who baled on me in the middle of my cancer treatment. Please ask your friends for ANYTHING you need---whether it is someone to take you to your treatments, or a shoulder to cry on, or someone to watch a funny movie together. Also. I found it really helpful to see a counselor who specialized in cancer patient's issues. Your guy should find someone to talk to about his feelings as well--a safe place where he can express his fears. Cancer affects the whole family. One thing I used to tell myself on the way to my chemo appointments was "It won't always be like this" ---my mantra
I will be sending lots of loving, healing energy to you and your guy.
Jeano

I spoke with a counselor at the cancer center today. This isn't so uncommon that a spouse/partner bales. Sad. I am blessed with great support. Very blessed.

[deb_U_taunt]

Some moments, this just sucks.

[deb_U_taunt]

I had my last a/c treatment, so no more of the red devil!!!!!! So, I am at the half way mark through chemo. Now 4 taxol and done with chemo on Sept 16th. Feels great to be half way there.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Debby

I had my last a/c treatment, so no more of the red devil!!!!!! So, I am at the half way mark through chemo. Now 4 taxol and done with chemo on Sept 16th. Feels great to be half way there.

AWESOME! Seems as though it is "hump day" for you!

Congrats!

Btw, I love you sig line...so true, so true. And so many don't know this.

[deb_U_taunt]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

AWESOME! Seems as though it is "hump day" for you!

Congrats!

Btw, I love you sig line...so true, so true. And so many don't know this.

The sig line is a Native American proverb. Its one I have hanging in my cube at work, too.

It feels like a hump day. I took a nap after and feel great so far. It is amazing how much attitude can make all the difference.

[deb_U_taunt]

Originally Posted by Tommi

((((((((Debby and your SO))))))))))))))
Amazing what dynamics come into play when we are members of this special club we did not ask to become members of.
Maybe this is his way of dealing with the pain YOU are going through. I know partners feel helpless and sometimes act out in the worst ways, and say things that need to be discussed. I know I can't change another's way of dealing with issues, but I know I have to take care of myself.

My best advice...Al Anon. There are gay meetings in some area's, and there are on-line meetings. It really is One Day at a Time.
http://webcache.googleusercontent.co...www.google.com

I do go to Alanon. LOVE Alanon and I know this isn't on me. Some people just don't have the ovaries.