So you want to start a poly relationship..

[Loren_Q]

Originally Posted by Charmingbutch21

Not sure if this is the right thread to post in but anyway...

How do you (folks) in poly relationships deal with the NRE (new relationship energy) of a person you are dating who is dating someone new, and who also happens to have a primary relationship?

Personally, I've moved through the jealousy part and understand that I have qualities that this lady loves. Her S.O. and new person of interest have qualities she loves too. No biggie. I'm new to this (6 or so months), so I want to make sure she knows I still care, but I don't want to overwhelm her with communication while she is in NRE with someone else. So, I text here and there to reassure her I'm still around and she texts and calls too. Things seem to be good, but I don't want to over communicate nor under communicate. If that makes sense.

What says you?

I've not been in that particular configuration, I'm the one with the primary partner.

However one thing I do with my poly partners is make sure there's at least 1 time a week we speak, usually just a half hour or so (my commute time) but it's pretty sacrosanct. This means even when/if I'm in NRE my other non-primaries know I'm still there. It helps them hold space for me and vice-versa if they fall for someone.

Having that set date/time really helps I've found.