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#1 |
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Member
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Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
Single Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: VA
Posts: 355
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I've been married in the past. Once to a complete and total asshole and once to a good guy with a lot of issues. A LOT. Bless his heart, he is 44 and has had a lot of physical and mental illnesses we found in his late 20s/30s. We're still married and he lives with me, mostly because his only family is a sister that's more mentally ill than he is. For all intents and purposes, he is my adopted brother now. He has a girlfriend and so do I.
My butch and I are long distance. When that changes, and should she ever want to get married (or, for that matter, if he wanted to marry his gf and I felt she could really take care of him), obviously I'd divorce him, though the logistics of taking care of him would be a bit tricky if I moved. I have no children so that does make it easier. So, I have been married for a long time, but it hasn't been a marriage in a long long time, if that makes sense. lol I like marriage. I'd marry my butch in a heartbeat, but I'm not sure she's into marriage at this point in her life. She's settled into her "old dykedom". lol...She's had a committment ceremony before, so it's not that she's never liked it, and we will definitely live together when it all works out, just not sure if it'll be as wife and wife. As for divorce, if it's not working (barring abuse, cheating, etc. whatever your limits are) and you really try to make it work (actually, really try), then there's a certain point you just call it. You say, "I love you. I'll always love you. But this isn't working. Keep in touch and let me know how it's going." lol
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So plant your own gardens and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. ― Jorge Luis Borges |
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#2 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Ol butch bones. Preferred Pronoun?:
Old thing Relationship Status:
Too old to play. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: :rolleyes:
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"Love Rules all of Heaven and Earth below."
For love, I was married illegally for 35 years.. Divorce? Ha! Legal marriage and divorce to me now, however, should always be about financial security ...FIRST! Suppose I was legally married for those thirty five years? I now know that we would have needed at least 35,000 minimum emergency funds, at least 50,000 yearly combined income to live just above the poverty line, and since she became extremely ill, we would need to carry all the health and life insurance we could handle to protect our assets. Plus, I would also have been responsible for her student loans, and other debts So, if I were to ever get legally married, I would certainly ponder on these things..I would have gotten divorced before too many debts accrued between us.. I woulda shoulda..yadda. yadda..
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#3 |
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Practically Lives Here
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He/him/his Relationship Status:
Single Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Oklahoma
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I am kinda glad that I didn't marry my ex, because I can see the divorce now, it would have been horrible and very painful.
I am going through a lot of emotions and feelings since we broke up and marriage is no longer in my future with anyone, I refuse to deal with the heart break. |
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#4 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
OFOS Stone butch Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
Loved Caregiver Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Texas
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I have never been married. Perhaps someday I will meet someone that is a good match for me but I am in no hurry.
My life is pretty darn good. |
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#5 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Stonebutch Preferred Pronoun?:
she Relationship Status:
single Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Canada
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We had a union (no legal marriages then) and lived together for 22 years. A wonderful woman. We grew apart and I knew she was not happy. I was in school for 5 years and she said she felt like a widow. I went all year long. We had 3 beautiful fur babies and we had bought a home. I signed the house over to her and moved to an apt. It is sad as I never really will stop loving her but have moved on so I hope she is happy. She gave me wonderful years. I didn't need a divorce just an unhappy woman in my life so that's it.
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