Grieving

Shystonefem · 05-09-2016, 03:19 PM

May is a difficult month for me. My mom's birthday is May 5th. I lost her when I was 21. My dad pass 3 years before my mom on May 20th.

I don't know if you ever get over the loss of a parent. I was extremely close to my dad and not really close to my mom in the end. Still, I dislike May a bit.

theoddz · 05-09-2016, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shystonefem

May is a difficult month for me. My mom's birthday is May 5th. I lost her when I was 21. My dad pass 3 years before my mom on May 20th.

I don't know if you ever get over the loss of a parent. I was extremely close to my dad and not really close to my mom in the end. Still, I dislike May a bit.

I hear ya. May is also a very difficult month for me, also. I lost my father 3 years ago, on May 17th. In him, I lost, not only my dear father, but my mentor, my best friend, my hero and one of my staunchest allies. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him and wish he were still here. May 15th has a couple of painful anniversaries by itself, which I won't go into here. It is a month of loss, really. I have learned to come to terms with a lot of the grief, but there are still some sad, raw emotions that come in this sad month for me.

I hope your month passes peacefully, SSF. Surround yourself with loved ones and do a little something special for yourself. Take care of you.

~Theo~

storyspinner70 · 05-09-2016, 03:51 PM

My sister died when she was 7 - I was 18. My dad lost his mind. My mom retreated. I compartmentalized. My brother - I don't know. So it went on. It was always hard to know whether to include her in family things. We didn't speak of her for a long time because it hurt too much. It still does.

Mother's Day is always rough, because my ex lost his mother when she was 48, my butch lost her mother a few years ago, and celebrating my mother always seems to mean remembering my lost sister.

My thoughts to all of you who are having a hard time this time of year. Prayers if you want them, wishes if you don't. I'm sorry for all your pain.

theoddz · 06-07-2016, 11:07 AM

Yesterday, I lost the second half of 2 of the best friends I've ever had in my life......my dear old friend of over 30 years, Irene. Dear Wife and I had to make the awful, heartwrenching decision to withdraw the life support that was sustaining her for the last 6 days. There was just no "meaningful recovery" in her future, due to Multi Organ Failure, and it was simply time to let Irene go with her wife, soulmate and lover of over 22 years (separated only by death, when Angie died at age 42, in 1995).

There is a profound sense of sadness in my heart, but in another sense, I am very happy for her that she is now with Angie again. Irene wished to be cremated, and that is what we will do for her. Long ago, I promised Irene that, when she died, I would take her back home to Brunswick, GA, and scatter her ashes over the Marshes of Glynn (poem by Sidney Lanier).

Rest in peace, old friend, and know that you were deeply loved and will be sorely missed. Go with Angie and know love, joy and peace again.

~Theo~

MsTinkerbelly · 06-30-2016, 02:58 PM

I was looking deep in the linen closet for old towels today, when a stack fell off and wound up on the floor. On top was a towel embroidered with the word "Sis". Omg, I felt my heart squeeze, and it was all I could do to catch my breath. The towel was one of a set given to my mother over 30 years ago by my Aunt...I didn't know I still had it!

I have been very sad this past week missing my daughter and my Mom...it was kind of like (sappy I know) a sign from her letting me know she is still around. Then, out of the blue my daughter called to complain about her job, and I was able to get my Amy fix.

I miss them both so much, and in such different ways.

05-09-2016, 03:19 PM	#1
Shystonefem Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Shy for President Join Date: May 2014 Location: NH Posts: 1,105 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,475 Thanked 3,671 Times in 897 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	May is a difficult month for me. My mom's birthday is May 5th. I lost her when I was 21. My dad pass 3 years before my mom on May 20th. I don't know if you ever get over the loss of a parent. I was extremely close to my dad and not really close to my mom in the end. Still, I dislike May a bit. __________________ Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ~Lao Tzu

05-09-2016, 03:51 PM	#3
storyspinner70 Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: VA Posts: 355 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,366 Thanked 987 Times in 289 Posts Rep Power: 8681947	My sister died when she was 7 - I was 18. My dad lost his mind. My mom retreated. I compartmentalized. My brother - I don't know. So it went on. It was always hard to know whether to include her in family things. We didn't speak of her for a long time because it hurt too much. It still does. Mother's Day is always rough, because my ex lost his mother when she was 48, my butch lost her mother a few years ago, and celebrating my mother always seems to mean remembering my lost sister. My thoughts to all of you who are having a hard time this time of year. Prayers if you want them, wishes if you don't. I'm sorry for all your pain. __________________ So plant your own gardens and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. ― Jorge Luis Borges

06-07-2016, 11:07 AM	#4
theoddz Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Cranky Old Poop Preferred Pronoun?: Mr. Beast Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Central Texas Posts: 3,540 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,139 Thanked 9,932 Times in 2,512 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Yesterday, I lost the second half of 2 of the best friends I've ever had in my life......my dear old friend of over 30 years, Irene. Dear Wife and I had to make the awful, heartwrenching decision to withdraw the life support that was sustaining her for the last 6 days. There was just no "meaningful recovery" in her future, due to Multi Organ Failure, and it was simply time to let Irene go with her wife, soulmate and lover of over 22 years (separated only by death, when Angie died at age 42, in 1995). There is a profound sense of sadness in my heart, but in another sense, I am very happy for her that she is now with Angie again. Irene wished to be cremated, and that is what we will do for her. Long ago, I promised Irene that, when she died, I would take her back home to Brunswick, GA, and scatter her ashes over the Marshes of Glynn (poem by Sidney Lanier). Rest in peace, old friend, and know that you were deeply loved and will be sorely missed. Go with Angie and know love, joy and peace again. *~Theo~*

06-30-2016, 02:58 PM	#5
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,907 Times in 5,017 Posts Rep Power: 0	I was looking deep in the linen closet for old towels today, when a stack fell off and wound up on the floor. On top was a towel embroidered with the word "Sis". Omg, I felt my heart squeeze, and it was all I could do to catch my breath. The towel was one of a set given to my mother over 30 years ago by my Aunt...I didn't know I still had it! I have been very sad this past week missing my daughter and my Mom...it was kind of like (sappy I know) a sign from her letting me know she is still around. Then, out of the blue my daughter called to complain about her job, and I was able to get my Amy fix. I miss them both so much, and in such different ways.