Banter and flirting

nowandthen · 05-19-2010, 10:23 AM

So, I am watching the West Wing and I love the banter and wit wrapped in the flirting scenes. I admit I am a week kneed Butch who is seduced by a Women's ability to use her brain to banter as a form of seduction

And you? is Banter a part of your flirting dance? If not is it a deal breaker?

I'll start, yes it is a deal breaker for me I find I need that balance of quick wit intellect in a potential partner. Having had it and also not having had it.

JustBeingMe · 05-19-2010, 12:41 PM

I prefer someone be just who they are in real life and be honest about it, that way I can see how they act, and if I find a trait that I don't care for, it could be a deal breaker for me.

Kobi · 05-19-2010, 01:02 PM

I like the banter and wit a lot. I like anyone who "gets" my often bizarre sense of humor.

Lots of things might be deal breakers but intelligence, wit, and willingness to tolerate my occasional weirdness tend to keep me interested.

Soft*Silver · 05-19-2010, 01:02 PM

I like good banter. However I dont like show offs whose egoes are so inflated that they think everything they say deserves an applause or is a trophy of their intelligence. You get one or a few in every crowd..it ends up looking like this:

I like banter and wit to be seasoned with compassion and humanity...

nowandthen · 05-19-2010, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness

I like good banter. However I dont like show offs whose egoes are so inflated that they think everything they say deserves an applause or is a trophy of their intelligence. You get one or a few in every crowd..it ends up looking like this:

I like banter and wit to be seasoned with compassion and humanity...

Oh I not for show off banter, I'm for equal exchange banter, so I guess I find a difference between banter and having to be right, banter for me is not about being right, it is about the exchange, laughter,thought provoking,sexual innuendo, etc. I love the writing on the West Wing the exchanges or as I think of it as banter.

The_Lady_Snow · 05-19-2010, 01:29 PM

Cerebral fucking!!!! Gotta have it!!!

Mister Bent · 05-19-2010, 01:34 PM

Banter, oh yes. Got. to. have. it.

I need the witty repartee. To be kept on my toes, challenged. Scint- & titillated. Keep me from becoming complacent.

Play 20 questions with me, show me you're a smarty pants.

I need it in my friends, too.

I'm a demanding asshole that way.

eta: "equal exchange banter" I like this. Reciprocity in all things. Except, well. Somethings.

JustBeingMe · 05-19-2010, 01:40 PM

If it's bantering, I like the kind that makes me :yeah that:

Mister Bent · 05-19-2010, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

Cerebral fucking!!!! Gotta have it!!!

Gray matter is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

always2late · 05-19-2010, 01:58 PM

I am a fan of the banter-dance. Entice me, challenge me, make me laugh, voice your ideas, thoughts, opinions.....that is the ultimate foreplay. Attract my mind...and the body follows suit.

freyja · 05-19-2010, 02:38 PM

i agree totally!

Just last night i had a great chat with a BFguy friend of mine.
Gosh he makes me laugh.
i just love when someone is quick on the take and can challenge me to keep up.
(not that i'm a slow chick - you should see me in action

)

*freyja*--> in search of a mind-seducer. Any applicants? *grin*

TickledPink · 05-19-2010, 02:44 PM

Get inside my head? The rest is easy........

Diva · 05-19-2010, 03:04 PM

To me, (<~~ & what that means is "The following is MY opinion.") there is nothing more dreary than to be in a conversation with someone who never says anything or says very little....I might as well be talking to a wall.

I have to have the banter....I have to have the verbal 'sparring' (I don't mean fighting)....challenge me/let me challenge YOU, I have to have the back~&~forth of idea~bouncing.....it's intelligent, it makes me think, it excites me and delights me and it turns me on on SO many levels.........

Be milk~toast if You wish, but don't climb into my bowl, thanks!

nowandthen · 05-19-2010, 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diva

Be milk~toast if You wish, but don't climb into my bowl, thanks!

[/COLOR][/I][/B]

that made me laugh out loud

Deborah · 05-19-2010, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diva

To me, (<~~ & what that means is "The following is MY opinion.") there is nothing more dreary than to be in a conversation with someone who never says anything or says very little....I might as well be talking to a wall.

I have to have the banter....I have to have the verbal 'sparring' (I don't mean fighting)....challenge me/let me challenge YOU, I have to have the back~&~forth of idea~bouncing.....it's intelligent, it makes me think, it excites me and delights me and it turns me on on SO many levels.........

Be milk~toast if You wish, but don't climb into my bowl, thanks!

We are so on the same page Darling Diva...if someone can't take the banter they are gonna get their feelers hurt...and I don't want to hurt nobody...well not usually..I love me a good smartass, I am with Dude ya know, gotta love 'em

Gemme · 05-19-2010, 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nowandthen

So, I am watching the West Wing and I love the banter and wit wrapped in the flirting scenes. I admit I am a week kneed Butch who is seduced by a Women's ability to use her brain to banter as a form of seduction

And you? is Banter a part of your flirting dance? If not is it a deal breaker?

I'll start, yes it is a deal breaker for me I find I need that balance of quick wit intellect in a potential partner. Having had it and also not having had it.

Banter is very important for me. It's very similar to the rituals used in the animal kingdom. One being makes an advance, whether verbally, physically or through eye contact across the room (kinda physical but separate). The other being is either receptive or not. If receptive, the dance begins.

For me, words and the way one's mind works is just as potent a part of the flirting and mating ritual as the actual movements of the body. I can't have one without the other. There has to be a carnal, physical connection but if the mental processes aren't clicking, then it's going nowhere fast.

It works the same the other way too. I can have all the witty banter and flirtatious nothings whispered in my ear, but if I'm not attracted physically to them and they are not showing me that they are physically attracted to me, it's off. No Donkey Kong will be played that night or with that person.

GoofyLuvr · 05-19-2010, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaqueline

We are so on the same page Darling Diva...if someone can't take the banter they are gonna get their feelers hurt...and I don't want to hurt nobody...well not usually..I love me a good smartass, I am with Dude ya know, gotta love 'em

This is SO VERY true for me, also. It's always the smartass that catches my attention, and also gets me into BIG trouble! Lawdy, the stories I could tell! But, yup, if they can't give it AND take it, they can just keep on walkin!!!

homoe · 10-21-2015, 05:53 PM

Wit is a MUST if you want to catch my attention

homoe · 09-09-2018, 12:02 PM

Next is brains........someone who can carry on a good conversation!

MaddieRobbie · 09-09-2018, 02:38 PM

There a few things sexier than a sharp mind - and good banter and skilled flirting are a sure sign of one!

I LIKE suggestive innuendo and good flirting. I love it when someone brings their A game to a conversation, an email, even a text. The more creative, the better...

Plus, if anyone's really that good, chances are they'll have an opportunity to back it up in person.

05-19-2010, 10:23 AM	#1
nowandthen Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Butch Preferred Pronoun?: S/he Relationship Status: In a realationship with my PhD. Dissertation work for the next 3 years Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: West Coast Posts: 508 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 400 Thanked 947 Times in 325 Posts Rep Power: 6580599	Banter and flirting So, I am watching the West Wing and I love the banter and wit wrapped in the flirting scenes. I admit I am a week kneed Butch who is seduced by a Women's ability to use her brain to banter as a form of seduction And you? is Banter a part of your flirting dance? If not is it a deal breaker? I'll start, yes it is a deal breaker for me I find I need that balance of quick wit intellect in a potential partner. Having had it and also not having had it. __________________ "Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you." "Does it hurt" asked the Rabbit, "Sometimes", said the Skin Horse, for he was always honest. " It's a Kind of testing, The kind of testing that spiritual warriors need in order to awaken their Heart" PC

05-19-2010, 12:41 PM	#2
JustBeingMe Senior Member How Do You Identify?: as ME Relationship Status: I don't need no stinking status. Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: somewhere you're not..... Posts: 1,808 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,961 Thanked 1,690 Times in 694 Posts Rep Power: 12813869	I prefer someone be just who they are in real life and be honest about it, that way I can see how they act, and if I find a trait that I don't care for, it could be a deal breaker for me. __________________ Nothing more, Nothing less, I'm Just Being Me

05-19-2010, 01:02 PM	#3
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,634 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	I like the banter and wit a lot. I like anyone who "gets" my often bizarre sense of humor. Lots of things might be deal breakers but intelligence, wit, and willingness to tolerate my occasional weirdness tend to keep me interested. __________________

05-19-2010, 01:02 PM	#4
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,592 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,908 Times in 4,062 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	I like good banter. However I dont like show offs whose egoes are so inflated that they think everything they say deserves an applause or is a trophy of their intelligence. You get one or a few in every crowd..it ends up looking like this: I like banter and wit to be seasoned with compassion and humanity... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

05-19-2010, 01:29 PM	#6
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,081 Times in 15,669 Posts Rep Power: 21474874	Cerebral fucking!!!! Gotta have it!!! __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

05-19-2010, 01:34 PM	#7
Mister Bent Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: . Posts: 2,905 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,151 Thanked 5,825 Times in 1,722 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I prefer to call it "maintaining standards." Banter, oh yes. Got. to. have. it. I need the witty repartee. To be kept on my toes, challenged. Scint- & titillated. Keep me from becoming complacent. Play 20 questions with me, show me you're a smarty pants. I need it in my friends, too. I'm a demanding asshole that way. eta: "equal exchange banter" I like this. Reciprocity in all things. Except, well. Somethings. __________________ Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats. - H. L. Mencken Last edited by Mister Bent; 05-19-2010 at 01:35 PM. Reason: eta. duh. don't be dumb!

05-19-2010, 01:40 PM	#8
JustBeingMe Senior Member How Do You Identify?: as ME Relationship Status: I don't need no stinking status. Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: somewhere you're not..... Posts: 1,808 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,961 Thanked 1,690 Times in 694 Posts Rep Power: 12813869	If it's bantering, I like the kind that makes me :yeah that: __________________ Nothing more, Nothing less, I'm Just Being Me

05-19-2010, 01:58 PM	#10
always2late Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: m'lady Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NJ Posts: 2,000 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,834 Thanked 6,231 Times in 1,462 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I am a fan of the banter-dance. Entice me, challenge me, make me laugh, voice your ideas, thoughts, opinions.....that is the ultimate foreplay. Attract my mind...and the body follows suit. __________________ Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there ~ Rumi

05-19-2010, 02:38 PM	#11
freyja Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: in the kitchen Posts: 182 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5 Thanked 146 Times in 76 Posts Rep Power: 28	i agree totally! Just last night i had a great chat with a BFguy friend of mine. Gosh he makes me laugh. i just love when someone is quick on the take and can challenge me to keep up. (not that i'm a slow chick - you should see me in action ) freyja--> in search of a mind-seducer. Any applicants? grin __________________ ____________________ freyja's kitchen

05-19-2010, 02:44 PM	#12
TickledPink Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Girly Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Miss Pink Relationship Status: Shacked UP Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The Holt-Mason Chateau Decherd/I'm a NashVegas Girl! Posts: 1,041 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 586 Thanked 1,997 Times in 606 Posts Rep Power: 9218476	Get inside my head? The rest is easy........

05-19-2010, 03:04 PM	#13
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,174 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0	To me, (<~~ & what that means is "The following is MY opinion.") there is nothing more dreary than to be in a conversation with someone who never says anything or says very little....I might as well be talking to a wall. I have to have the banter....I have to have the verbal 'sparring' (I don't mean fighting)....challenge me/let me challenge YOU, I have to have the back~&~forth of idea~bouncing.....it's intelligent, it makes me think, it excites me and delights me and it turns me on on SO many levels......... Be milk~toast if You wish, but don't climb into my bowl, thanks!

10-21-2015, 05:53 PM	#18
homoe Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch Relationship Status: ..... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: 30 minute ferry ride from Seattle Posts: 38,565 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,811 Thanked 33,558 Times in 14,919 Posts Rep Power: 21474890	Wit is a MUST if you want to catch my attention

09-09-2018, 12:02 PM	#19
homoe Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch Relationship Status: ..... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: 30 minute ferry ride from Seattle Posts: 38,565 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,811 Thanked 33,558 Times in 14,919 Posts Rep Power: 21474890	Next is brains........someone who can carry on a good conversation!

09-09-2018, 02:38 PM	#20
MaddieRobbie Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Free Join Date: Aug 2018 Location: Brooklyn Posts: 96 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34 Thanked 311 Times in 79 Posts Rep Power: 2491087	God yes... There a few things sexier than a sharp mind - and good banter and skilled flirting are a sure sign of one! I LIKE suggestive innuendo and good flirting. I love it when someone brings their A game to a conversation, an email, even a text. The more creative, the better... Plus, if anyone's really that good, chances are they'll have an opportunity to back it up in person.