Original Bad Prose or Stories!

*Anya* · 02-01-2017, 09:19 AM

*Bump*

It's been a couple of years and we have some new folks.

With all of the pre and post election misery; how about using some of that inspiration to get those creative juices flowing again?

Give it your best shot for some original bad prose or stories!

As bad as you can make it!

In case you need more inspiration:

The 2016 winner:

Even from the hall, the overpowering stench told me the dingy caramel glow in his office would be from a ten-thousand-cigarette layer of nicotine baked on a naked bulb hanging from a frayed wire in the center of a likely cracked and water-stained ceiling, but I was broke, he was cheap, and I had to find her. —
William "Barry" Brockett, Tallahassee, FL

Runner-up:

Her grandmother had mopped her brow with the same antique kerchief for twenty years whilst working in the barley fields, and now Anastasia was to wear it on her wedding night knotted into a baggy loose panty; while her lover Anatoly would wear his father's ancient gray and tattered undershorts tied around his neck to honor the old village custom of marital odor-blending. — David S. Nelson, Falls Creek, VA

http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2016win.html

PS:

Thanks to Truly Scrumptious for the reminder!

Kätzchen · 02-02-2017, 09:11 AM

Thanks Anya for bumping this thread!

You're right, I miss bad writing stories and could use a good laugh, lol!

Last year's winner from Tallassee, Florida was terribly funny, but I could definitely relate to the part about "being broke, he was cheap, and I had to find her." And ....the color of the light bulb . LOL (or not).

Kätzchen · 02-26-2017, 02:38 PM

As he stood there, trying to figure out which tactic would get him the chance to say he was sorry for hanging up on her or not looking her in the eye while lying about what exactly he was up to, when recently claiming that he missed his ride or couldn't find a ride (neither excuse really was working), she skillfully placed the smartphone on speaker-phone, so he could hear the sound of a certain melody with clarity:

Silence Is Golden.

Medusa · 02-26-2017, 02:44 PM

Bad Haikus ROCK!

Huge, wet, brown dog eyes
Beg the question of the day
Will there be cookies?

02-01-2017, 09:19 AM	#1
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,443 Times in 7,285 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Bump It's been a couple of years and we have some new folks. With all of the pre and post election misery; how about using some of that inspiration to get those creative juices flowing again? Give it your best shot for some original bad prose or stories! As bad as you can make it! In case you need more inspiration: The 2016 winner: Even from the hall, the overpowering stench told me the dingy caramel glow in his office would be from a ten-thousand-cigarette layer of nicotine baked on a naked bulb hanging from a frayed wire in the center of a likely cracked and water-stained ceiling, but I was broke, he was cheap, and I had to find her. — William "Barry" Brockett, Tallahassee, FL Runner-up: Her grandmother had mopped her brow with the same antique kerchief for twenty years whilst working in the barley fields, and now Anastasia was to wear it on her wedding night knotted into a baggy loose panty; while her lover Anatoly would wear his father's ancient gray and tattered undershorts tied around his neck to honor the old village custom of marital odor-blending. — David S. Nelson, Falls Creek, VA http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2016win.html PS: Thanks to Truly Scrumptious for the reminder! __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

02-26-2017, 02:38 PM	#3
Kätzchen Member How Do You Identify?: As a Brick House (Femme) Relationship Status: Busy (involved with a special someone here at home) Join Date: May 2010 Location: In a small community Posts: 16,275 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,290 Thanked 33,636 Times in 10,728 Posts Rep Power: 21474868	As he stood there, trying to figure out which tactic would get him the chance to say he was sorry for hanging up on her or not looking her in the eye while lying about what exactly he was up to, when recently claiming that he missed his ride or couldn't find a ride (neither excuse really was working), she skillfully placed the smartphone on speaker-phone, so he could hear the sound of a certain melody with clarity: Silence Is Golden. __________________ “The way someone treats you is not a reflection of your worth: It’s a reflection of their emotional capacity,” — Jillian Turecki. ”Without justice, democracy dies,” — Jess Michaels (Epstein survivor). Please join the greater efforts of everyday American’s in boycotting billionaire business and news agencies until all contents of the Epstein Files are revealed and the entire collection of corrupt officials face justice for their Un-American acts endangering us and others globally.

02-26-2017, 02:44 PM	#4
Medusa Mentally Delicious How Do You Identify?: Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?: Mme. Relationship Status: Married to JD. Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 10,446 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,995 Thanked 42,677 Times in 7,831 Posts Rep Power: 10000026	Bad Haikus ROCK! Huge, wet, brown dog eyes Beg the question of the day Will there be cookies? __________________ . . . Buy ButchFemmePlanet Merch Here: https://teespring.com/stores/butchfemmeplanetcom-merch

02-02-2017, 09:11 AM	#2
Kätzchen Member How Do You Identify?: As a Brick House (Femme) Relationship Status: Busy (involved with a special someone here at home) Join Date: May 2010 Location: In a small community Posts: 16,275 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,290 Thanked 33,636 Times in 10,728 Posts Rep Power: 21474868	Thanks Anya for bumping this thread! You're right, I miss bad writing stories and could use a good laugh, lol! Last year's winner from Tallassee, Florida was terribly funny, but I could definitely relate to the part about "being broke, he was cheap, and I had to find her." And ....the color of the light bulb . LOL (or not).