What do YOU need to feel loved?

[Lady Pamela]

Understanding of my condition and patience when It is flaired up.

Honesty and full trust in me. "That I will do and act as I say" And that I will honor my relationships in whatever scene or circumstance.

The freedom to be me without being degraded or accused of false actions. Even if I am silly at times.

Acceptance that family and committment to those I care for are the most valuable thing in my life. And that I take an active role in every one.

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Sweet

This one is very hard for me to think about.

I try not to think about love or being loved ... it might cause me to let my walls down or to give someone a key to a very deep part of my inner-self.

I'm not a "needy" person. But there are a few things I would like to experience in this life...before going to the next one and having to search all over again.

I need to feel protected... to eventually share my worst fears with someone, and have them NOT use it against me.

To feel protected when I have had a nasty day being a Tough-Ass-Boss at work, but the "little girl" in me needs comfort and a tender touch.

I am far from weak... but have weak moments... if I can ever find someone to trust with that key to the very deep part of my inner-self,
I need to feel protected and respected during my weak moments.

I didn't feel protected as a child or young adult... I would NEVER take for granted the special person that could do this for me. And I would NEVER take for granted the special gift of protection they would bestow on me.

I think if I could find the kind of special person who's willing to protect me in a way that I have always dreamed of... I may possibly be able to think about love and being loved without fear of being hurt. I think I would and could love them with all my heart and soul if they could do this for me.

(that's all I wish to share at this time... maybe more later)

I understand and relate to this very much.

[Pretty Woman]

Two part answer from me:
What do I need to feel loved (inside myself): Safety, calm, quiet, introspective time. Days when I can put the dysfunctional chatter of my upbringing on the shelf and know that I am a superb human being, meaning that I do the absolute best I can and take steps to correct my mistakes when I fall short of my goals for myself. That stuff happened in the past..by folks who really needed help and had no capacity for parenting.

What do I need to feel loved (by another human being): See above...I absolutely am unable to be in true partnership with another individual unless I'm cool with me. And once that's in place, interaction with another human being who is also committed to knowin that it takes two to tango and that half of the problem is on each side. And, that defending a heels dug in position doesn't advance the ball.