Stone Femme?

[Contradictor]

Originally Posted by CherylNYC

Yeah, no. Being in charge doesn't equal butch. I understand that you're kind of joking, and I'm trying not to tear my hair out because it upsets me that so many people really do buy into this cultural stereotype.

You describe yourself as femme, and as a top. That means you're a femme top. You aren't interested in being penetrated, and you're reluctant to receive touch. Yes, many people would call you stone. Femme Stone Top. Or a Stone Femme. Yes, it's confusing. I continue to advocate for a change in nomenclature.

I know other women like you. I believe there are some who have or do frequent this site.

Thank you for the reply Cheryl, let me apologise for being 'one of those' it wasn't intentional. It isn't so much that I buy into stereotypes, in fact I too have been annoyed by them when people make assumptions about me. (Admittedly usually cis males but not always), more that I have been influenced by them and been questioning which one I would or would not be and I felt like I was an outsider ( I must clarify it wasn't somethng that kept me awake at night so to speak).

I am happy to adopt the stone femme label, I know labels can be very damaging but they can be useful when used correctly and I was feeling a bit bewildered. I think with me personally too, I have only just began to question things and only just become au fait with the internet. So it's a bit of a new world even though in 'real life' I've never had an issue with things. It's natural curiosity I gues.

Originally Posted by girl_dee

I could have written most of this but the "traditional butch role" is by your defenition only. I have been "in charge" in relationships, in bed and otherwise, i don't like receiving oral sex, but not once, even for a second, have i felt butch or stone.

My issue is i am.stubborn and don't like being vulnerable so i "take charge". However when it is safe i totally enjoy being spoiled and being swept off my feet, by a butch.

Maybe you could find one to let you enjoy it too.

Yes, I have had that definition as an amalgamation as what I've read (not on here I must add)!

We do sound similar although I do feel 'butch' in some ways, and although in (very) small situations I've melted a little when a butch has done something for me or to me, I generally do not like it. I'm in a long term relationship with a butch, but we fell into our way of working very quickly although she does struggle a little with some things I do or don't do.