Artists, are we unstable?

[Tawse]

I want to say something here but I'm not sure what I want to say. I know I'm a little ruffled but not sure why...

Ok - there are a million shades of "artist" just like there's a million shades of gay. I feel like we're looking at one shade of artist and broad stroking the entire community with that image - or worse yet, implying that is the only shade available.

And I'm guessing that image is (very loosely) the person who stops working to create art, barely survives on their income, may or may not become nomadic... is devoted more to art than people... etc


And I know artists like that.


But I know a lot MORE artists who have their "9 to 5" jobs, have families, and schedule the time they devote to their art (unless over taken by amazing inspiration), and most of us wouldn't know them from anyone else in our maze of cubicles at work.

I guess I just feel like it's being implied that those of us who partition off our lives, continue to work 9 to 5s, and schedule our art time aren't "artists"...

I dunno.

Something rubs me wrong here and I'm not exactly sure what it is.

Or maybe - ironically enough - the message with this thread is that if you aren't unstable - you're not an artist...

oh wouldn't that be a twist!

[Rivkeh]

Originally Posted by laruss

I'm not sure this is the best place to ask this question as this is where the artists hang out and maybe I need to ask those who date the artists.

But...

I have seen a number of comments on here and other places about not dating artists, never again, don't do it, and have also heard comments from others about artists.

As someone who recently left the corporate world to pursue my art and have completely changed my life from penthouses to barns, from Starbucks to home brew, from attending the theatre to participating in Art Walks. My life has done a complete 180 and I have never been happier... but, do I need to be concerned?

Will I become unstable, will I become undatable because people assume I am unstable? What is it about artists that scare partners or potential partners away.

I don't think I have ever dated an artist in all these years.

What do I need to know?

Thanks in advance for any insight you can give me into this unknown world and why we don't date artists.

This made me laugh! Ummm ok, being an artist has never made me undatable, unstable or scared potential partners away, I really don't think you have anything to worry about...just enjoy having the freedom to express your creativity....

[twist of lime]

Sensationalism... Its scary stuff.

[Apocalipstic]

I sincerely have never seen a single post about this, so sad you saw one and it made you sad.

Anyone who thinks that does not deserve you.

[Toughy]

Originally Posted by Apocalipstic

I sincerely have never seen a single post about this, so sad you saw one and it made you sad.

Anyone who thinks that does not deserve you.

neither have I................and it makes me wonder if it there really was a post that said artists are unstable.......


thedivahrrrself pointed out her post did not say artists were unstable, yet the OP seems to think that.......................

shrug................I'm not inclined to believe anyone on this website said artists are unstable without a link to a post that makes that statement....

[Apocalipstic]

Maybe someone said something in chat or PM?

[macele]

income does have to in come, ... in some way. so if a person devotes all of their time to creating their art (no job other than creating), and the art does not produce any income, ... well then lol. that would not be good for paying the bills. may still bring happiness.

this certainly would be undesirable to some people, ... to date a person with little or no income.

but you know, you find out who really wants a relationship with you when not much money is in your wallet. i could think of this as being an up side, ... being an artist.

i don't have to sell a poem to be a poet, ... i'm still a poet. i could make lots of money via selling my poetry and still have a job away from writing, ... i'm still a poet. my poetry could be bad, ... i'm still a poet. a writer/artist, ... can't be just one way. not one definition. but ... what makes me a writer, ... is me. my own place. my own expression. that's mine. all mine.

i like the phrase, it all depends on whom you ask. all professions have passionate people who devote their time to what they love. they may go overboard, ... spend too much time away from home. an example, a coach. now there's an artist lol (my opinion). it all depends on who we date.

[StrongButch]

I think we are creative. Art brings out whats inside of you and shows it to the world.

[*Anya*]

Originally Posted by laruss

I'm not sure this is the best place to ask this question as this is where the artists hang out and maybe I need to ask those who date the artists.

But...

I have seen a number of comments on here and other places about not dating artists, never again, don't do it, and have also heard comments from others about artists.

As someone who recently left the corporate world to pursue my art and have completely changed my life from penthouses to barns, from Starbucks to home brew, from attending the theatre to participating in Art Walks. My life has done a complete 180 and I have never been happier... but, do I need to be concerned?

Will I become unstable, will I become undatable because people assume I am unstable? What is it about artists that scare partners or potential partners away.

I don't think I have ever dated an artist in all these years.

What do I need to know?

Thanks in advance for any insight you can give me into this unknown world and why we don't date artists.

The OP stated that she has read posts here and other places that say not to date an artist.

Nowhere in this post does she say that she read that artists are unstable!

She simply asked if she would become unstable or undatable!

Answer from me: No.

[Ginger]

I don't think it's a good idea to generalize about artists.

It's just too broad and diverse a group of people and one that is constantly changing—given the economy, technology, access to education, and so many other factors.

IMO.

[Amulette]

I stumbled upon this thread and it sparked a need for expression for me. So I think I will share.

Being one of those "crazy artist types" I have had to wrestle with societal norms and the people who need them from me. I have a different way of seeing reality and it reflects in how I live my life. I'm about 85% right brained. So I use different parts of my brain to survive and accomplish things than my left brained friends. And my ways may seem odd to people who are more logically focused.

Example: When I was younger I was in a relationship with someone who had what I call a "worker bee" mentality. Very structured and devoted to accomplishing the tasks that are expected of them. Everything needed to happen in order and on time for their world to be right. I understand that there is security and functional sense to this. I on the other hand would get immersed in projects loosing all track of time, realize I should have started dinner an hour ago, refocus and create a fabulous dinner (albeit late). I would be excited to share my creative projects and they would be like is dinner ready? Soon darling........ my heart sinking.

I drove them stark raving and also thrilled the hell out of them. They were like a blanket and cocoa, warm comfort, but bored me to tears. I was all too willing to except that I was lacking as partner for not fitting into those societal norms and being Clara Clockwork. And to justify their need for order they were willing to support that theory. Sigh. Not a match made in heaven. Everything got done but love could not overcome that reality clash.

Sometime later I heard a Native American theory about the left brain, right brain thing. It told of their being two types of women/mothers. Earth women and Star women. Earth women are like the "worker bee" people. They are steady, predictable, logical, masters of physical order. This is how they nourish their loved ones. Star women are the dreamers, visionaries, artists, storytellers. They nourish their loved ones by inspiring their hearts. What a beautiful validation that was.

For me personally the fundamental difference is motivation and the methods it incurs. Life happens and things need to get done. The societal norm says A,B,C,and D need to get done and you do them because you have to. You have to because it's survival. So do it. Work, chores, bills, everyday stuff. Physical order.

My motivation is beauty. I worship beauty. I'm not just cleaning, I'm making the house more beautiful. (That journey is not for the faint of heart.) I'm not just cooking I'm doing art and healing with food and spices. When I create I looses all sense of time and go into anther world. But, things get done, my credit is excellent, the house is clean, the food is great, I show up to work on time. And while my methods may scare (and thrill) the hell out of some, it makes perfect sense to me. Neither I nor my friends consider me "unstable". Hahaha we call it being a free spirit.

You wanted to know if you should should date an artist? I would answer that with a question. How flexible is your reality?????

[Vincent]

Originally Posted by Amulette

I stumbled upon this thread and it sparked a need for expression for me. So I think I will share.

Being one of those "crazy artist types" I have had to wrestle with societal norms and the people who need them from me. I have a different way of seeing reality and it reflects in how I live my life. I'm about 85% right brained. So I use different parts of my brain to survive and accomplish things than my left brained friends. And my ways may seem odd to people who are more logically focused.

Example: When I was younger I was in a relationship with someone who had what I call a "worker bee" mentality. Very structured and devoted to accomplishing the tasks that are expected of them. Everything needed to happen in order and on time for their world to be right. I understand that there is security and functional sense to this. I on the other hand would get immersed in projects loosing all track of time, realize I should have started dinner an hour ago, refocus and create a fabulous dinner (albeit late). I would be excited to share my creative projects and they would be like is dinner ready? Soon darling........ my heart sinking.

I drove them stark raving and also thrilled the hell out of them. They were like a blanket and cocoa, warm comfort, but bored me to tears. I was all too willing to except that I was lacking as partner for not fitting into those societal norms and being Clara Clockwork. And to justify their need for order they were willing to support that theory. Sigh. Not a match made in heaven. Everything got done but love could not overcome that reality clash.

Sometime later I heard a Native American theory about the left brain, right brain thing. It told of their being two types of women/mothers. Earth women and Star women. Earth women are like the "worker bee" people. They are steady, predictable, logical, masters of physical order. This is how they nourish their loved ones. Star women are the dreamers, visionaries, artists, storytellers. They nourish their loved ones by inspiring their hearts. What a beautiful validation that was.

For me personally the fundamental difference is motivation and the methods it incurs. Life happens and things need to get done. The societal norm says A,B,C,and D need to get done and you do them because you have to. You have to because it's survival. So do it. Work, chores, bills, everyday stuff. Physical order.

My motivation is beauty. I worship beauty. I'm not just cleaning, I'm making the house more beautiful. (That journey is not for the faint of heart.) I'm not just cooking I'm doing art and healing with food and spices. When I create I looses all sense of time and go into anther world. But, things get done, my credit is excellent, the house is clean, the food is great, I show up to work on time. And while my methods may scare (and thrill) the hell out of some, it makes perfect sense to me. Neither I nor my friends consider me "unstable". Hahaha we call it being a free spirit.

You wanted to know if you should should date an artist? I would answer that with a question. How flexible is your reality?????

I totaly get that,a lot of people think I'm bat shit crazy.
I'm retired now and get asked "arn't you bored"
Me-never
I'm either,thinking,mainly politics,reading ,playing music,listening to new music,or watching some new series or documentory,that I will ponder on,
I cant date,9-5 ers.
I drive them nuts,and get on great with other nuts.

people used to call Vinven VG,foo foo,means crazy