The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over.

[Wryly]

Hey all!

Not much going on today. I'm lost without any World Cup matches on the tv!

Have been reading - a book my SIL gave me the other day. Quite interesting.

Suppose I shall head out now and pick up some groceries.

[lipstixgal]

Good afternoon lofters, hope you all are having a fine day, took the little guys for a walk they loved it, the weather here is beautiful nice and warm with low humidity!!

[MysticOceansFL]

Hello lofter's I finally got my truck back from the shop I'll give it a test drive myself and head out to the movies to see Ironman 2. Have a great one everyone!

[Jet]

Flyin by.
Have a good night all.

[WickedFemme]

Hello lofters, I just need to 'rant' a bit... lol...
So, has anyone else experienced the whole 'invisibility' dilemma that seems to happen around younger groups of people and/or people who just don't see you after a certain age? This has been a super annoying thing that is happening more and more as I approach 50. I'm going on 47 this year and it is just getting really icky annoying... I have even experienced it with butches that are my same age. I sometimes feel like a heterosexual woman dealing with man/woman issues, if that makes any sense at all. Anyways, I just wanted to throw it out there and see how everyone else is coping with getting older and the whole invisibility thing. I think it happens more to us femmes than butches because of the whole 'gender' thing too. I have noticed that it's totally attractive hip and cool for an older butch to be with a younger femme or be attracted and vice versa... like younger femmes seem to be totally attracted to older butches - maybe it's the whole daddy girl dynamic thingy. Anyways, I was at this social gathering talking in a group of people that were all close to my age and mixed (butches and femmes) and then these two young girls (in their 20's) show up and the butches just totally dismissed me and the other older femmes and started drooling and making little side flirty comments... it was like we were all of the sudden 'invisible'. It's hard enough getting old and dealing with the changes in our bodies, etc.. without this sort of behavior. Anyways, how do you all deal with this.

Just a little disclaimer... I'm in a relationship and am totally secure in it, I'm not single and I'm not looking, etc.. so, it wasn't like I was offended, but it did trigger some 'aging' issues within me.

[ruthie14]

Yeah I have noticed the same thing. I am single and it is quite annoying. I seem to have become the "femme stand in" for single butches or butches who want to be single. Then when some one, skinner or youner or prettier comes along.. I am toast.

Hope everyone had a wonderful day. Weather is great here. I am staying home, dying my hair and generally loafing around for a change. lol

[Jet]

I, for one, am not attracted to young women. ( In their 20s or 30s)

[ruthie14]

Originally Posted by Jet

I, for one, am not attracted to young women. ( In their 20s or 30s)

Yeah.. there's one!

[lipstixgal]

Originally Posted by WickedFemme

Hello lofters, I just need to 'rant' a bit... lol...
So, has anyone else experienced the whole 'invisibility' dilemma that seems to happen around younger groups of people and/or people who just don't see you after a certain age? This has been a super annoying thing that is happening more and more as I approach 50. I'm going on 47 this year and it is just getting really icky annoying... I have even experienced it with butches that are my same age. I sometimes feel like a heterosexual woman dealing with man/woman issues, if that makes any sense at all. Anyways, I just wanted to throw it out there and see how everyone else is coping with getting older and the whole invisibility thing. I think it happens more to us femmes than butches because of the whole 'gender' thing too. I have noticed that it's totally attractive hip and cool for an older butch to be with a younger femme or be attracted and vice versa... like younger femmes seem to be totally attracted to older butches - maybe it's the whole daddy girl dynamic thingy. Anyways, I was at this social gathering talking in a group of people that were all close to my age and mixed (butches and femmes) and then these two young girls (in their 20's) show up and the butches just totally dismissed me and the other older femmes and started drooling and making little side flirty comments... it was like we were all of the sudden 'invisible'. It's hard enough getting old and dealing with the changes in our bodies, etc.. without this sort of behavior. Anyways, how do you all deal with this.

Just a little disclaimer... I'm in a relationship and am totally secure in it, I'm not single and I'm not looking, etc.. so, it wasn't like I was offended, but it did trigger some 'aging' issues within me.

I 've noticed that too butches flirting with younger femmes. Its annoying to say the least and getting older like 50's it hard to deal with other issues that are going on to have that thrown in your face!!

[Rockinonahigh]

Boy have I ever been there,the last time I was at the gbar(the only place hear to meet anyone) I could have been the mom or grandma of nearly everyone in the building..talk about feeling out of place. One of them even had the stupidy to ask if I was in the wrong gbar..nasty little wench.I have dated younger but it never worked,if anyone my age wants to date younger is all there is hear to go out with.U bet im not a stand in till something better comes around.

[ruthie14]

Morning everyone..
Doing something nice for myself everyday to boost my spirits. Dyed my hair last night.. Get a hair cut tonight... etc etc. Little things.. but they help. Planning a party for this weekend... Will be fun.

Have a wonderful day everyone!

Ruthie

[lipstixgal]

Originally Posted by ruthie14

Morning everyone..
Doing something nice for myself everyday to boost my spirits. Dyed my hair last night.. Get a hair cut tonight... etc etc. Little things.. but they help. Planning a party for this weekend... Will be fun.

Have a wonderful day everyone!

Ruthie

Good Morning everyone!! Ruthie glad to hear that you are doing something for yourself, that's good and getting a hair cut is always a good thing ya know. good luck with your party wished I lived closer, it should be fun. Anyway, I have to go to school to give in transcripts so I could get credit for a class they want me to take, should be interesting to see what they have to say. Have a great day at work or play everyone!! leaving a little chocolate just because

[Legendryder]

Well, I am a 46 yo single Butch. And I plan on staying single. I do not have time to put into what is required to have a good and stable relationship. Trying to have one would not be fair to either party. So, I just do not date, and have not for almost 8 years. Until I am finished with my schooling, however long that takes, and am into a solid working enviornment, it is not going to happen. I am happy with what I am doing, and it have given me an opportunity to really learn myself, and there is just nothing wrong with that. Besides, I have Bob. He is more than a handful anyhow.

[Wryly]

Hey all!

Today is Canada Day. In a little while I'm heading into Toronto - going to try hit the gay village for lunch. Got some plans for later with a friend.

Looks like I'm going to be on the road again this weekend - going to pick my sister up from her visit and then I'm taking a nephew to one of Toronto's northern suburbs. I'm bummed because it is PRIDE weekend and I'd hoped to go to the Dyke March. I guess since I'm not working that people assume I don't have anything planned.

I might be able to check in here tomorrow - if not everyone have a happy and safe holiday weekend!

[cuddlyfemme]

Good morning everyone! I hope everyone has a good day

[*Magic_and_Silk*]

Something to make you all smile!

[lipstixgal]

Good afternoon lofters, hope everyone is having a great day!!

Good *morning/afternoon/evening (* delete as applicable to your time zone) Lofters

Another of the non-femme (not exactly butch but a genderqueer poof! ) persuasion here who prefers older women. I've always preferred older women, I was dating women in their 40's and 50's when I was in my 20's and 30's... then I became 'older' myself and tried the younger ones for a while, even someone who was nearly half my age (42 - 22) and having tried it I know I will never go back there again

Let's have a big Woooo for older women!

The current Mrs.Incubus (I say current, it keeps her on her toes :) is a tad younger than me but suffice to say she's in her 40's and drop dead gorgeous

I hope everyone is having a grand day of fair wind and plain sailing.



ps. Happy Canada Day Wryly

[lipstixgal]

Originally Posted by Incubus

Good *morning/afternoon/evening (* delete as applicable to your time zone) Lofters

Another of the non-femme (not exactly butch but a genderqueer poof! ) persuasion here who prefers older women. I've always preferred older women, I was dating women in their 40's and 50's when I was in my 20's and 30's... then I became 'older' myself and tried the younger ones for a while, even someone who was nearly half my age (42 - 22) and having tried it I know I will never go back there again

Let's have a big Woooo for older women!

The current Mrs.Incubus (I say current, it keeps her on her toes :) is a tad younger than me but suffice to say she's in her 40's and drop dead gorgeous

I hope everyone is having a grand day of fair wind and plain sailing.



ps. Happy Canada Day Wryly

Hi Incubus, how is your day going?? Is it evening there yet across the pond?? I have been going for the younger women at least that is what has been coming my way in the last couple of months. Its nice to know that even if you are in your 50's you can still get women younger then yourself. I, Myself am in my 50's but look about 35 so maybe that is why!! Anyway, going to get a tad of coffee for the afternoon and a bite to eat too. tummy rumble.[/I]

[lipstixgal]

Originally Posted by Legendryder

Well, I am a 46 yo single Butch. And I plan on staying single. I do not have time to put into what is required to have a good and stable relationship. Trying to have one would not be fair to either party. So, I just do not date, and have not for almost 8 years. Until I am finished with my schooling, however long that takes, and am into a solid working environment, it is not going to happen. I am happy with what I am doing, and it have given me an opportunity to really learn myself, and there is just nothing wrong with that. Besides, I have Bob. He is more than a handful anyhow.

Who's Bob is that your dog? Aren't you lonely? being single for almost 8 years. I wish someone would come into my life and fulfill it. I need that, yeah I have dogs but its not enough for me. I'm ready to take the plunge!!