what NOT to do in a relationship....... - Page 17

bigbutchmistie · 08-02-2010, 10:09 PM

Understand that I dont have family dont belittle me because you do.

Dont be verbally/physically/emotionally abusive in any way to me

Dont expect me to pay your bills

Dont complain about me being too mushy. When Im a man whose comfortable enough to tell you and show you that I love you and adore you.

When you know I dont dance, dont dance to love songs with other butches while out. Its disrespectful. And rude. Besides I may have two left feet but would slow dance with you given the chance.

Dont fall asleep during a heartfelt conversation

Lynn · 08-02-2010, 10:11 PM

Don't yell at me or call me names. Don't be sarcastic when you are angry or say "nothing" when I ask what's wrong.

Don't notice and appreciate beautiful women and expect me not to do the same. We sometimes are attracted to the same thing. Sorry that weirds you out.

bright_arrow · 08-02-2010, 10:11 PM

Don't tickle me to wake me up. You will have one seething, hissing, hellbent femme on your hands!

bright_arrow · 08-02-2010, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lynn

Don't yell at me or call me names. Don't be sarcastic when you are angry or say "nothing" when I ask what's wrong.

Don't notice and appreciate beautiful women and expect me not to do the same. We sometimes are attracted to the same thing. Sorry that weirds you out.

I am guilty of sometimes being sarcastic while angry, though I do my hardest not to be.

And I hate to be told "nothing" is wrong when something is clearly wrong...

bigbutchmistie · 08-02-2010, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by desdansmoncoeur

Don't tickle me to wake me up. You will have one seething, hissing, hellbent femme on your hands!

Im the same way except I will be one moody dude. LOL I cant stand to be "hollered" at either to be woken up... DONT every do that one either lol

bigbutchmistie · 08-02-2010, 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lynn

Don't yell at me or call me names. Don't be sarcastic when you are angry or say "nothing" when I ask what's wrong.

Don't notice and appreciate beautiful women and expect me not to do the same. We sometimes are attracted to the same thing. Sorry that weirds you out.

Yea I hate that too. Being yelled at and called names. I also hate the sarcastic "nothing" when asked if something is wrong.

Soft*Silver · 08-02-2010, 10:20 PM

yeah....well....call me fat and I will say "nothing!" when you ask me what is wrong...lol....

we will need a

to put out the fires with that!

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigbutchmistie

Yea I hate that too. Being yelled at and called names. I also hate the sarcastic "nothing" when asked if something is wrong.

bigbutchmistie · 08-02-2010, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness

yeah....well....call me fat and I will say "nothing!" when you ask me what is wrong...lol....

we will need a

to put out the fires with that!

LOL I have no doubt!

Lynn · 08-02-2010, 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by desdansmoncoeur

I am guilty of sometimes being sarcastic while angry, though I do my hardest not to be.

And I hate to be told "nothing" is wrong when something is clearly wrong...

Believe me, I can be sarcastic, too. I work on it.

Maybe the biggest one of all is:

Don't be hesitant to take responsibility for what you do, and I'll do the same. Everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect. A quiet apology goes a long way.

bigbutchmistie · 08-02-2010, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lynn

Believe me, I can be sarcastic, too. I work on it.

Maybe the biggest one of all is:

Don't be hesitant to take responsibility for what you do, and I'll do the same. Everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect. A quiet apology goes a long way.

AMEN, AMEN AND AMEN !!!!!

bright_arrow · 08-02-2010, 10:43 PM

Don't tell me you don't deserve me. You do. I am not perfect, I have flaws. How do you not deserve someone who will care about you and love you? Everyone deserves that.

Don't get snippy with me. You might be in a bad mood or caught off guard but do NOT bite my head off. And do not use profanity aimed towards me or something I may have done. I get defensive and the last thing I want to do is be around you because now I feel like worthless.

tuffboi29 · 08-02-2010, 11:17 PM

If you're mad at me, fine...but for the love o' Moses...DO NOT say "whatever" and disregard what I have to say on the situation.
I swear thats the most juvenile thing I've ever heard come up in an argument.

DamonK · 08-03-2010, 02:03 AM

Don't forget why you fell in love in the first place.

If that happens, sometimes, you can never recover.

dark_crystal · 08-03-2010, 08:45 AM

do not escalate every disagreement to "we might as well just break up, then"

because we will.

i have been emotionally blackmailed with this one too many times, and i dated a butch a couple of years ago that i warned straight up about this. i was really attracted to hym. i really liked hym. we had a really good time together. i was considering relocating, even.

then one day hy picked a fight with me thru text message (!) and when it didn't go hys way hy texted me that maybe i should just go find someone else if i wasn't going to act right (!)

hy never heard from me again.

Rockinonahigh · 08-03-2010, 08:55 AM

Oh yes I get ya'll on the hollering,tickleing and belittling ...one more thing to add..dont ever grab me in anger and threatin me..not cool..u will not win...u will be out the door ina flash.

Julie · 08-03-2010, 09:04 AM

To be naked ~ Body and Soul
Is a most vulnerable place
Do Not turn your back and walk away
I will never forget that hurt ~ nor will I let it go

foxyshaman · 08-03-2010, 10:22 AM

Dont start a deep conversation, or try to sort out an issue, when I am on my way to bed. Or when I am in bed. If you want to talk to me, do it when i am awake.

amiyesiam · 08-03-2010, 11:47 AM

don't call me controlling when I won't do what you want me to do

and don't blame me when you want to do something I don't wan to do and you chose not to do it cause I won't do it.

don't hog the remote, the music, the phone or anything else that impacts me cause i am in the same space

don't expect me to entertain you all the time. I am never bored and there will never be enough hours in the day to learn, do, find out about, discover, read, craft, etc. everything I would want to.

don't tell me you are bored all the time
bored people are lazy or boring in and of them selves.

NJFemmie · 08-03-2010, 11:53 AM

When arguing or disagreeing, don't make things up based on what "you" might think is true. Too many fights escalate into something entirely different leaving a person to defend themselves from against unfounded accusations.

I'm amazed how many people actually do this sort of thing.

Jesse · 08-03-2010, 11:56 AM

DO NOT assume that I feel/think one way or the other. This is a HUGE pet peeve for me! ASK me what my thoughts or feelings are instead please. If you do not trust me enough to communicate honestly with me, then why are you here?

08-02-2010, 10:11 PM	#322
Lynn Member How Do You Identify?: Unabashed Feminine Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: Her, She Relationship Status: Married! Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Upstate NY Posts: 689 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,499 Thanked 2,413 Times in 504 Posts Rep Power: 9668975	Don't yell at me or call me names. Don't be sarcastic when you are angry or say "nothing" when I ask what's wrong. Don't notice and appreciate beautiful women and expect me not to do the same. We sometimes are attracted to the same thing. Sorry that weirds you out. __________________ In the flush of love's light we dare be brave And suddenly we see that love costs all we are and will ever be. Yet it is only love which sets us free. Maya Angelou Wedding Photos: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?...1&l=22b092b98c

08-02-2010, 11:17 PM	#332
tuffboi29 Member How Do You Identify?: Queer..in the queer deffinition of the queer meaning of the queer word... Preferred Pronoun?: Mr. SuperTuff Relationship Status: Things happen... Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: somewhere over the rainbow Posts: 483 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 894 Thanked 684 Times in 293 Posts Rep Power: 93006	If you're mad at me, fine...but for the love o' Moses...DO NOT say "whatever" and disregard what I have to say on the situation. I swear thats the most juvenile thing I've ever heard come up in an argument. __________________ "Today we would pass through the scenes of our youth like travelers. We are burnt up by hard facts; like tradesmen we understand distinctions, and like butchers, necessities. We are no longer untroubled - we are indifferent. We might exist there; but, should we really live there?" ~Erich Maria Remarque "All Quiet on the Western Front" http://a6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphot..._4605968_n.jpg

08-03-2010, 09:04 AM	#336
Julie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Angel * Femme * Lesbian * Girl * Woman * Slut * Bitch * Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: No longer a Virgin Bride to Dreamer ~ May 17th, 2014 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New York Posts: 4,674 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17,676 Thanked 18,160 Times in 3,633 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	To be naked ~ Body and Soul Is a most vulnerable place Do Not turn your back and walk away I will never forget that hurt ~ nor will I let it go __________________ “Sometimes only one person is missing and the whole world seems depopulated.” ~ Alphonse de Lamartine - 1790-1869 http://i374.photobucket.com/albums/o...ps4d9fb6c0.jpg I Love You ~ I Love Us May 17, 2014

08-03-2010, 10:22 AM	#337
foxyshaman Member How Do You Identify?: spiritually minded dirt dog Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: canada Posts: 898 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,957 Thanked 2,592 Times in 663 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Dont start a deep conversation, or try to sort out an issue, when I am on my way to bed. Or when I am in bed. If you want to talk to me, do it when i am awake. __________________ Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. Muriel Strode

08-03-2010, 11:47 AM	#338
amiyesiam Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she/they Relationship Status: single Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: pa Posts: 2,703 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17,488 Thanked 10,135 Times in 2,161 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	don't call me controlling when I won't do what you want me to do and don't blame me when you want to do something I don't wan to do and you chose not to do it cause I won't do it. don't hog the remote, the music, the phone or anything else that impacts me cause i am in the same space don't expect me to entertain you all the time. I am never bored and there will never be enough hours in the day to learn, do, find out about, discover, read, craft, etc. everything I would want to. don't tell me you are bored all the time bored people are lazy or boring in and of them selves. __________________ A year from now you will wish that you started today~Karen Lamb

08-02-2010, 10:09 PM	#321
bigbutchmistie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Since You Need A Label. Butch Relationship Status: Still Dreaming Of My Happily Ever After Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Arlington Texas Posts: 4,009 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,950 Thanked 5,364 Times in 1,941 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Understand that I dont have family dont belittle me because you do. Dont be verbally/physically/emotionally abusive in any way to me Dont expect me to pay your bills Dont complain about me being too mushy. When Im a man whose comfortable enough to tell you and show you that I love you and adore you. When you know I dont dance, dont dance to love songs with other butches while out. Its disrespectful. And rude. Besides I may have two left feet but would slow dance with you given the chance. Dont fall asleep during a heartfelt conversation

08-02-2010, 10:11 PM	#323
bright_arrow ☆ the stars are aligned ☆ How Do You Identify?: one queer mama Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: married to my Boo Daddy <3 Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: nor cal Posts: 2,910 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,644 Thanked 9,363 Times in 2,296 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Don't tickle me to wake me up. You will have one seething, hissing, hellbent femme on your hands!

08-02-2010, 10:43 PM	#331
bright_arrow ☆ the stars are aligned ☆ How Do You Identify?: one queer mama Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: married to my Boo Daddy <3 Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: nor cal Posts: 2,910 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,644 Thanked 9,363 Times in 2,296 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Don't tell me you don't deserve me. You do. I am not perfect, I have flaws. How do you not deserve someone who will care about you and love you? Everyone deserves that. Don't get snippy with me. You might be in a bad mood or caught off guard but do NOT bite my head off. And do not use profanity aimed towards me or something I may have done. I get defensive and the last thing I want to do is be around you because now I feel like worthless.

08-03-2010, 02:03 AM	#333
DamonK Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Preferred Pronoun?: . Relationship Status: . Join Date: May 2010 Location: . Posts: 2,199 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,527 Thanked 7,762 Times in 1,881 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Don't forget why you fell in love in the first place. If that happens, sometimes, you can never recover.

08-03-2010, 08:45 AM	#334
dark_crystal Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: jenny Preferred Pronoun?: babygirl Relationship Status: First Lady of the United SMH Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,445 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,532 Thanked 26,550 Times in 4,688 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	do not escalate every disagreement to "we might as well just break up, then" because we will. i have been emotionally blackmailed with this one too many times, and i dated a butch a couple of years ago that i warned straight up about this. i was really attracted to hym. i really liked hym. we had a really good time together. i was considering relocating, even. then one day hy picked a fight with me thru text message (!) and when it didn't go hys way hy texted me that maybe i should just go find someone else if i wasn't going to act right (!) hy never heard from me again.

08-03-2010, 08:55 AM	#335
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,933 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Oh yes I get ya'll on the hollering,tickleing and belittling ...one more thing to add..dont ever grab me in anger and threatin me..not cool..u will not win...u will be out the door ina flash.

08-03-2010, 11:53 AM	#339
NJFemmie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?: I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status: Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New Jersey Posts: 4,683 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,343 Thanked 11,420 Times in 2,976 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	When arguing or disagreeing, don't make things up based on what "you" might think is true. Too many fights escalate into something entirely different leaving a person to defend themselves from against unfounded accusations. I'm amazed how many people actually do this sort of thing. __________________

08-03-2010, 11:56 AM	#340
Jesse Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transguy Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Central West Coast of Florida Posts: 5,204 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,866 Thanked 17,784 Times in 3,940 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	DO NOT assume that I feel/think one way or the other. This is a HUGE pet peeve for me! ASK me what my thoughts or feelings are instead please. If you do not trust me enough to communicate honestly with me, then why are you here? __________________ “You’re so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that widened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this.”