Friends of Bill W.

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 27




Burning with Desire


You cannot stop the flames from licking me by telling me I am not on fire. For some reason you do not perceive the flames; you do not know fire. I cradle the desperate hope that you will recognize the ashes when the burn is done. By then it is too late for rescue, but the field is then wide open for regret. Resplendent is what I thought I was before the fire broke out. Now I feel like a misunderstood mansion torched to make way for a Walmart.




Dream your own dreams


*

FUNK & WAGNALL’S BACK PORCH

Bottoms come sealed in envelopes
From unknown accountants.
Amazing how many nominees and how few winners.
The audience filled with past recipients
Hold their collective breaths.

They pray for this years finalist
And pray a bigger prayer
Of thanks to this years donors,
The ones who prove with their lives
That it hasn’t gotten better out there.

The speeches are the same.
A gratitude list and maybe a punch line.
The smiles and tears fresh but familiar.

When the lights go out on this night,
The days of diligence begin once again
So no one need loose their seat
And we can all celebrate here next year together.

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 28





Defining the Indefinable

What is Alcoholism? What is a Hurricane? What is a Cataclysm? I know I look for the root cause, look to predict the outcome, look to prevention and preservation of this thing which comes pouring from the four winds to land in my dooryard and knock on my screen door. What it shows me today, the furious winds, the slanting rain, may not be how it presents tomorrow, but I must keep in mind it is all the same storm and must be regarded with the same respect and treated with the same care and diligence. Whether it’s the thirst or the thinking, a jail cell or my mental mouse trap, alcoholism is an umbrella term for the tsunami, which came to collect me, but no definition will convey the devastation it has wrought.






Make sure you are more than your memories

*

THE FRUIT BOWL

Meetings are living and precious fruit
I must squeeze every drop from them
even the lemons.

I am privileged to be among the succulent growth
and pungent fragrance of determined hearts
and minds ----the infusion of strength.

The vitality received from the essence of truth
gives and gives to me.
I am refreshed by exposure to raw talent
revived by action and growth.

The diversity of shape and flavor
cheer and inspire me.
The contrast from bowl to challis is dramatic
ever a reminder to stay where it’s fresh.

[RockOn]

Love your August 28th post, Sherry.

Today, I do not try to hide the elephant in the living room under the rug. It was always so futile, anyway. And I was the last to know.

I chose to unmask, reveal him. This robbed him of his power.

Today, he cooperates. See him now.


Here is my support, my program.


It is always there for us ... anyone who seeks it with sincere desire. We only have to chose it ... then cooperate ... follow a few simple suggestions.

I pray I continue making the correct choice ... one day at a time.
Today, the fight is over and what an enormous relief.

Peace.
Brock

[LeftWriteFemme]

Thanks so much Brock! I am so glad you like this post! It's good to see the elephant is out and dancing!!! I'm keeping your sponsor in my thoughts and prayers today.

[RockOn]

Sherry,

Thanks so much for keeping Cheryl in your thoughts and prayers. I am thinking I will hear from her within an hour from now. They get their results back before they leave the testing facility ... so she will know if she passed it. It is a very tough computer certification exam and she has studied for about the past three months. I admire her grit. The good thing is she can take it again if she did not pass it today. And there is no shame in that. I believe she told me it costs her $250.00 to take it.

Enjoy your Saturday!

P.S.
Yes, the elephant is dancing today. He danced yesterday also. I honestly believe if I keep doing what I am doing, he will dance again tomorrow. Just so thankful I do not have to wrestle with him anymore. I was getting all mashed to heck and banged up pretty bad!! He always won in the end back then. I had to cease fighting everything and everyone. Amazing, that is when I noticed he started dancing. LOL!

[RockOn]

Ohhhhhhhhh ...

Cheryl just called and she was crying. She missed the passing mark by 4 questions. I hate this for her.

We talked. I told her I am proud of her no matter what. Wow, the fact she is attempting to study for this without any bootcamp training speaks volumnes about her determination and grit. She can take it again and the only thing that will change is her date on her certification. We are going to get together later on today. She wants to see my new dog.

The thing today is we people in the program are able to face life on life's terms, endure disappointments and not drink. With the tools provided by the program, we are winners ... we pick up and utilize those tools instead of the drink ... these tools that have been so freely given - made available to us. Before, we had no choice ... we did what we had to do during desperate events - which of course brought on more and more unraveling. At least, that is how it was back then for me but I could never, ever see it. Recovery opened my eyes.

Cheryl is okay. She even got to laughing. She made $1000.00 a while back on a job referral who was hired. She looked on the bright side, realized it has not cost her anything and still has more tries at the exam before it starts costing her out of pocket. Cheryl is a sport, I tell you. And a winner too! I am proud to call her my sponsor.

[LeftWriteFemme]

What a good attitude! Test can be hell. Please tell her I'm rooting for her.

The dog is so cute! What a nice pair of dogs you have.

I love your description of of the elephant dancing!!

I'm sure Cheryl will ace the test next time!

Have a great weekend!