"Pro-ana" websites turn girls on to anorexia

[suebee]

Originally Posted by dark_crystal

usually the sites are created by those who are already ill and seeking to band together with others to "stay strong." The disease is very isolating and you tend to withdraw from friends and family b/c social and family functions tend to involve eating- which i was capable of NOT doing, but it causes uncomfortable questions, etc.

You feel like no one understands, and you're right. You don't want to admit that you are sick so you seek out other sick people to make you feel normal.

all of the original livejournal comms are run by the same person, who ultimately seeks to attract the members to his treatment program.

I'm wondering - and you may or may not be able to answer this d.k. - Do the pictures posted not in any way spark a comprehension of the reality of situation to those who suffer from anorexia? I'm thinking that you can see your own image in the mirror and perceive yourself as "too fat", but is there no filter that recognizes a starving body, or has the ideal been completely replaced with emaciation? Is the behavior so compulsive at that point that there IS no reality check?

This is one of those disorders where I understand what happens, but struggle to understand exactly what the thought process becomes when one is in it's grips. I think that the fact that I tend to overeat and be overweight might be part of it too. But it occurs to me that if I have difficulty grasping it then probably there are others that do as well.

I don't in any way want you to answer if you're uncomfortable, but perhaps somebody on the site has more insight than I do and could explain.

Sue

[squeak]

Well, like dark_crystal said, it isn't always a teenage phenomenon, but I think it can be more prevalent in the microcosm of high school and trying to stand out in such a fixed community. But once you've identified with it, the thought patterns still crop up years later.

Like with any group, there will be people wanting to join because they feel they should to fit in, because they want to associate with the members of the group, because they feel drawn to the goal, and many different reasons. In my personal experience, it began in high school as a way to stand out. I was a social outcast, and I wanted the popular girls to like and admire me. One day a girl complimented me on how skinny I was, but not as skinny as another girl. I thought that my size could be a point of pride. It attracted people who liked being around an extreme, and they helped me police my eating and fawned over the size of my clothes and my restraint.

It wasn't so much a recovery process for me as it was a realization that I wasn't connecting with quality people and hated that they had control over me. It was easy to disconnect after high school. To this day I get really defensive when someone comments about what or how much I'm eating. I'm not sure why other people engage in this behavior, but for me it was something I could easily control and yielded results that were once an 'accomplishment.'

Thankfully, I now prefer to be complimented on my stellar baking abilities.

xosqueak

[dark_crystal]

Originally Posted by suebee

I'm wondering - and you may or may not be able to answer this d.k. - Do the pictures posted not in any way spark a comprehension of the reality of situation to those who suffer from anorexia? I'm thinking that you can see your own image in the mirror and perceive yourself as "too fat", but is there no filter that recognizes a starving body, or has the ideal been completely replaced with emaciation? Is the behavior so compulsive at that point that there IS no reality check?

This is one of those disorders where I understand what happens, but struggle to understand exactly what the thought process becomes when one is in it's grips. I think that the fact that I tend to overeat and be overweight might be part of it too. But it occurs to me that if I have difficulty grasping it then probably there are others that do as well.

I don't in any way want you to answer if you're uncomfortable, but perhaps somebody on the site has more insight than I do and could explain.

Sue

Do you mean the "Thinspo" photos? Of super-skinny and emaciated girls? I used to download those to my phone and scroll through them when faced with an eating situation, to remind me of my goals. So, no- they do not spark a reality check- they spark envy

[suebee]

Originally Posted by dark_crystal

Do you mean the "Thinspo" photos? Of super-skinny and emaciated girls? I used to download those to my phone and scroll through them when faced with an eating situation, to remind me of my goals. So, no- they do not spark a reality check- they spark envy

Yeah. That's incredible - to see a picture of someone who's probably on the verge of dying and be envious.

We - and I mean the grand "we" of society give so many messages to girls and women. I was shopping the other day thinking I could get some summer clothes on sale. I was looking for my size - which in MY mind is large - 16, 18 - depending upon the cut etc. "Large" was 10-12, "Small" was 6-8 I believe. So let's see: If you're a "normal" woman, you're between size 6 and 12. WTF?

And what's up with 89% of eleven year-olds thinking they're overweight?

[dark_crystal]

Originally Posted by suebee

Yeah. That's incredible - to see a picture of someone who's probably on the verge of dying and be envious.

We - and I mean the grand "we" of society give so many messages to girls and women. I was shopping the other day thinking I could get some summer clothes on sale. I was looking for my size - which in MY mind is large - 16, 18 - depending upon the cut etc. "Large" was 10-12, "Small" was 6-8 I believe. So let's see: If you're a "normal" woman, you're between size 6 and 12. WTF?

And what's up with 89% of eleven year-olds thinking they're overweight?

I remember being a 6th grader (age 11 in the fall, 12 by the end of the year, usually) and having my friends react with shock that i intended to actually eat at lunchtime...the prevailing opinion was that nobody else would dare to think they could afford the calories...course we all binged as soon as we got home. And this was in 1983!

[dark_crystal]

sometimes you just have to laugh at body dysphoria...i have been on a nutritionist-directed meal plan since early June and my weight is what they call "restored," meaning i am now medically normal. I can no longer wear my size zeroes so i today i went to buy new jeans...the first armload i took in the fitting room were 12s.

I went back and forth two more times before i got a pair to stay on me. i don't look at my body at all, ever. I know that my diease won't let me see what is really there. Even at a size zero i never wanted to look. i was so weak from starving that i could barely stand up and i still looked at myself and saw "needs improvement." i went out one night laced into a 22" corset and was miserable all night b/c i thought my stomach looked big

[suebee]

Originally Posted by dark_crystal

sometimes you just have to laugh at body dysphoria...i have been on a nutritionist-directed meal plan since early June and my weight is what they call "restored," meaning i am now medically normal. I can no longer wear my size zeroes so i today i went to buy new jeans...the first armload i took in the fitting room were 12s.

I went back and forth two more times before i got a pair to stay on me. i don't look at my body at all, ever. I know that my diease won't let me see what is really there. Even at a size zero i never wanted to look. i was so weak from starving that i could barely stand up and i still looked at myself and saw "needs improvement." i went out one night laced into a 22" corset and was miserable all night b/c i thought my stomach looked big

D.C., I suffer from depression, and that gives me the best analogy I can think of: when I'm in a depressive state (which, thank goodness isn't very often nowadays) I have to remember that it's the disease that makes the world so dark - that it's not necessarily so. Your disease makes you perceive your body in a certain way, and the way to survive is to be able to keep that in mind. Does this make sense?

[girl_dee]

I think there is a HUGE underestimation of the middle aged women who suffer with eating disorders..

When my ex partner realized i was binging and purging she said *what the hell?? girls in their 20's do that*

I think the pressure is even MORE powerful as we age... the damn weight just won't come off like it used to!

[dark_crystal]

Originally Posted by suebee

D.C., I suffer from depression, and that gives me the best analogy I can think of: when I'm in a depressive state (which, thank goodness isn't very often nowadays) I have to remember that it's the disease that makes the world so dark - that it's not necessarily so. Your disease makes you perceive your body in a certain way, and the way to survive is to be able to keep that in mind. Does this make sense?

yes, that does make a lot of sense and through nutritional counseling i have learned that when the weight first comes back it settles in all the wrong places and it could be a year before it distributes itself "properly."

i have made a deal with myself to just accept it for now and give it a year. Learning to live with a bigger body is hard but it IS marginally less hard than living with starvation and i gave many years to that...so having faith for one year that my body will regulate itself is something i am able to believe i deserve

Originally Posted by sassy_girl

I think there is a HUGE underestimation of the middle aged women who suffer with eating disorders..

When my ex partner realized i was binging and purging she said *what the hell?? girls in their 20's do that*

I think the pressure is even MORE powerful as we age... the damn weight just won't come off like it used to!

i know! and your body really does have a weight that it will fight to maintain...as i began my 3rd year of starvation i started to gain weight. i cut my galories to 700 a day and i was still gaining! that was when i knew i had to get treatment. I was already so weak and miserable and i couldn't face cutting back to 500 hundred or whatever it was going to take