Ask a trans person!

[Bit]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Linus, Braedon, Andrew, Parker, Greyson, Nick, Jaques}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Nice to see you all here! *smiling* It's good that we have the beginnings of a support thread already, a place for comparing notes and such!



{{{{{{{{{{{Arwen}}}}}}}}}}} Nice to see you here too, love--didn't want you to think I was ignoring you!

[Blue]

Hi everyone,

I always knew I was different but, like Linus, never had the words. My journey has been gradual (to say the least). Though I will say, in hindsight, I gave every indication of gender dysphoria from a very early age. It was my mother who finally asked me if I wouldn't have been happier if I could have 'become male'. I can remember always wanting to do 'boy things' and wanting to wear 'boy clothes' and wanting 'guy jobs' but my family always seemed to pass it of as 'tomboy syndrome' that would one day pass. It never did. I loved Halloween and was always male; complete with stubble and a bulge. I went through periods of hyper-feminity trying to immerse myself in the feminine thinking I might find something of myself there. Although I made a very pretty girl/woman, I always felt like a drag queen (or worse, like a very queer queer). Over time my wardrobe had less and less female clothing until I only shopped in the men's department. My hair got shorter and shorter until only a barber would do. For younger people this all may sound absurd but being a young person in the 70s ...simple changes like these took tremendous courage (fear coupled with action). Each step was a personal achievement for me.

I started T 3 years ago and felt more 'in focus' within a few weeks. I am very happy with the physical changes I have experienced; i.e. weight redistribution, weight loss, increased strength and endurance, muscle density, and a general sense of emotion centeredness. On the flip side I am finding myself almost too focused and unable to walk away from something I am doing until it is done. It seems to be the opposite of ADD and makes multitasking sort of difficult unless I am able to synchronize the tasks into a logical flow. I used to start things and never got around to finishing them, switching proirities and scuffling from one task to another and would become emotionally overwhelmed ...now everything has to wait it's turn but I do finish everything eventually Anyone else having this experience?

Blue

[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Blue

*snip*

For younger people this all may sound absurd but being a young person in the 70s ...simple changes like these took tremendous courage (fear coupled with action). Each step was a personal achievement for me.

*snip*

...now everything has to wait it's turn but I do finish everything eventually Anyone else having this experience?

Such a good point about how it used to be... Like you, I went through a period of time where I tried really hard to embrace being female and a "lesbian". Although I would not say I did it in a hyper-feminine way, I definitely made it a point to try and *not* "hide" my breasts........wore earrings.......stuff like that.

As for the other... I actually have had the opposite experience. I am more inclined to have a few things going on at the same time......spend a little time on refurbishing a dresser.......then work on the yard a little.......starting new little projects here and there.

That was not the case before. Not even close.

Interesting to think about.

[Jet]

Being a trauma survivor I lived 11 years in seclusion and tried to be a girl. It didn't work for me at all. Eleven years is a long time. Fast forward: I'm planning on starting T in January.

[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Ol' Jet

Being a trauma survivor I lived 11 years in seclusion and tried to be a girl. It didn't work for me at all. Eleven years is a long time. Fast forward: I'm planning on starting T in January.

I wish you all the best.

[Linus]

Originally Posted by Ol' Jet

Being a trauma survivor I lived 11 years in seclusion and tried to be a girl. It didn't work for me at all. Eleven years is a long time. Fast forward: I'm planning on starting T in January.

Congrats and good luck. An exciting life adventure to begin.

Originally Posted by Blue

<snip> I used to start things and never got around to finishing them, switching proirities and scuffling from one task to another and would become emotionally overwhelmed ...now everything has to wait it's turn but I do finish everything eventually Anyone else having this experience?

Blue

Not that much because life interferes but I do feel more focused. I have also noticed that it's harder to cry. Some things (like the Humane Society's adoption commercials) used to have me near bawling. Now, barely a tear. In some ways, I don't like this because it makes me feel "unemotional" but perhaps it's more of a narrow set of emotions than before.

[Jet]

Thanks for wishing me well. —Parker

[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Ol' Jet

Thanks for wishing me well. —Parker

Hey Parker...

Where are you in the name change process (assuming you plan to legally change it)?

Are you pursuing testosterone therapy through your regular doctor or someone new? Or a clinic?

Any thoughts on any surgeries?

I'm not intending to be nosey. Just thought it might generate more conversation on the early stages and, ultimately, help others who mosey into this thread.

I certainly respect your position if you don't care to share that information here.

[bigbutchmistie]

Hello all. I am posting here because I recently realized that I am trans. Its weird this body that I have. And I dont know how to quite identify. Everything is still so new to me. Do you identify as FTM without having the surgery? Do you identify as trans? Or the same butch label I have called myself for so long. Anyone who wants to PM me and help me out would be greatly appreciated. Hugs around to all you guys.

[Linus]

Hey BBM and welcome to the thread. How one identifies is entirely personal decision. What made you realize that you are trans? And trans could mean either transsexual or transgender. Are you going to medically transition? Do you intend on having surgery or are holding off?

There is no right or wrong answer to each of these but it's more something you have to address with yourself.

For me personally, I did an identity transition from butch --> transgender/genderqueer --> transguy/FTM. I haven't had surgery yet (although really want top surgery) but have been on T for over a year now.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I think how one id's is personal, I agree Linus. It comes from your soul. It doesn't come from between your legs as Chaz Bono stated in one of his interviews.

I had the surgeries to complete myself (mind, body, spirit). The only one left is my top surgery to correct the first one done. My surgeries all were cash. That is the one thing I wish would be covered by insurance. Going under general anesth. is not easy. In fact, it really makes me sick, and hard to wake up from. But I would love to feel the wind blowing on my chest while I am wearing swim trunks at the beach. It would be all at once. *Deep sigh.

I believe that there are always going to be those in our own glbt community who will put down those of us who are ftm/mtf. I have witnessed it firsthand. I think it sucks. Has anyone else witnessed this?

[Gentle Tiger]

No questions. Just dropping by to say hello. Still making my way around the site. Glad to know you guys are here.

[weatherboi]

Originally Posted by Gentle Tiger

No questions. Just dropping by to say hello. Still making my way around the site. Glad to know you guys are here.

Hey Gentle Tiger!! Welcome!!

[Linus]

Hey all.. I was curious if anyone has seen Beautiful Daughters from Logo (you can get it on NetFlix)? It was a documentary on the Vagina Monologues version that was done entirely from the TransWoman's perspective. I have to say: very moving. One of the things that was interesting was the comment that transwomen are like immigrants into womandom (as it were).

And I have to say, it's an apt analogy in many ways.

[handsomeFTM4u]

Originally Posted by Jet

Being a trauma survivor I lived 11 years in seclusion and tried to be a girl. It didn't work for me at all. Eleven years is a long time. Fast forward: I'm planning on starting T in January.

good for you. I have been on it for 6 years now, and I have to say it was the BEST DECISION I EVER MADE IN MY LIFE

[Jet]

I quite T. And there's a storm brewing. There are things in our past sometimes that can't be changed—things follow us. Wishing you well.

[Linus]

Originally Posted by katsarecool

thank you for asking Linus. You can go to ABCnews web site to watch the story. Just check the 20/20 link for yesterday's show. A short synopsis though; a mtf transgendered person becomes a widow of a fireman who lost his life fighting a fire. His family found out that she was born a man and is now suing her for survivor's benefits totalling almost a million dollars citing their marriage was not legal in TX. The surgery was done before marriage, the husband was well aware of the circumstances and she had her name changed on DL and other legal papers. It was very touching and emphasizes how far we have to go.

Ah.. this story: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...ead.php?t=1776

Originally Posted by Jet

I quite T. And there's a storm brewing. There are things in our past sometimes that can't be changed—things follow us. Wishing you well.

Sorry to hear that but sometimes we have to step back before we can move forward. Hopefully things will sort themselves out and allow you to move in the direction you want.