What is your Flirtation Style?

Soft*Silver · 09-20-2010, 02:00 PM

now look, butches and transfolks...stop the worrying about approaching us ladies. We are honored when you hike up your belt and saunter on over and cough and say hello. We love that little bit of sweat and fear that goes along with your confidence and courage. Its all there in you and thats what we love so much. Your "mix". We dont need lines or model handsomeness or suave conversation or flashy fashions to impress us. We want to see that look in your eye that says to us silently, that you are in awe of us. For just being us.

take it down a notch...dont be so in awe that it paralyzes you. We NEED you...so take a swallow and mosey on over....

MrSunshine · 09-20-2010, 02:01 PM

Takes too much energy so I don't do it. If I want something I say so.

ravfem · 09-20-2010, 02:05 PM

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

AtLast · 09-20-2010, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ravfem

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

Nah!

All in the eye of the beholder!

Gemme · 09-20-2010, 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ravfem

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

If it works for you, don't fix it.

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

AtLast · 09-20-2010, 04:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

If it works for you, don't fix it.

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

ROTFL!!! Ah, Geez! But yes... whatever works!

I just realized that the space in which I am most comfortable with flirting is through dance. Partner dancing. When I lead a good follow and we are in sync, I see her pride and twinkle (the lead's job is at all times, to make the follow look good!)! It is a dance of a kind of flirtation for me. Hummm... a mode of confidence! LOL... does get conversation flowing!

Oh, good, I have a style of flirtation!

ravfem · 09-20-2010, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

If it works for you, don't fix it.

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

ohhhhhhh!! What you call "cocky" i call a "charmer"!!

Yeah, no i don't care much for that type.

BS gets you zero stars!

princessbelle · 09-20-2010, 05:12 PM

Coolness thread!!!

Enjoyed the reading and thinking bout it all. Gosh, flirting, for me, just comes natural as I read some of you feel the same.

It is so much easier in person. It is so engaging to walk past someone i find interesting, get the attention, flash a smile and blush at exactly 3 seconds after making eye contact and look away. If all is well at that point then it may be time to offer up a game of pool, lean just right over that pool table and then gaze back to see where the eyes are. If the preliminary flirting is found to be receptive, then it is time to see if intellectually it is a match...if it is..then flirting is even more fun. It's in the walk, the smile, the wording, and the feminine "ways" for me at least.

It is just easier in person...it's just natural and man alive is it fun.

Online however, I find it very difficult. You can't see how the other person is really responding and i tend to put a lot of "lol"s in my convo just so the other person knows i'm smiling if i'm being a little "over the top" and confident.

The jury is still out if i am any good at online flirting i think...

But offer me a pool stick, a drink or a great conversation...and it's smooth sailing.

Girl_On_Fire · 02-24-2013, 09:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ravfem

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

TheMerryFairy · 02-24-2013, 09:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl_On_Fire

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

My friend, a crush actually, is the same way *smiles* I love it. Everything is a puzzle to her and in turn she is a puzzle. She had me fascinated because I could never tell how she was feeling or what she was thinking due to her own confusion about my own expressions and things. You aren't unapproachable hny!

You just need to be you and someone will take interest in you and maybe be the one to approach.

little_ms_sunshyne · 02-24-2013, 09:47 PM

AWKWARD! I have no game. I end up laughing entirely too much out of being nervous, I bite my bottom lip quite a bit, I trip over MYSELF, and it just continues in this awkward sequence of events...Absolutely hopeless!!!!!!!!!

TheMerryFairy · 02-24-2013, 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by little_ms_sunshyne

AWKWARD! I have no game. I end up laughing entirely too much out of being nervous, I bite my bottom lip quite a bit, I trip over MYSELF, and it just continues in this awkward sequence of events...Absolutely hopeless!!!!!!!!!

This has been known to happen to me when I am trying to do more than flirt on a friendly innocent level. I am happy I am not the only one and I feel your pain. It's not hopeless! It comes down to meeting the right people, I think LOL.

Girl_On_Fire · 02-24-2013, 09:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheMerryFairy

My friend, a crush actually, is the same way *smiles* I love it. Everything is a puzzle to her and in turn she is a puzzle. She had me fascinated because I could never tell how she was feeling or what she was thinking due to her own confusion about my own expressions and things. You aren't unapproachable hny!

You just need to be you and someone will take interest in you and maybe be the one to approach.

Ha ha! I'm more approachable online I think. I carry myself like I'm 10 feet tall and bullet-proof. I'm a little thing but I'm mighty.

Actually, online flirting isn't hard for me. It's easy for me to use plain language and little emoticons. I don't have to "read" the person's body language or facial expressions. There's no guesswork. It's cut and dry. I've also been told I flirt all the time but I don't. I'm just kind and friendly to everyone and I guess it gets taken out of context sometimes.

Honestly, at this stage in the game, I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't have the guts to approach me. I'll drop a hankie so-to-speak but you gotta do the rest guys.

TheMerryFairy · 02-24-2013, 09:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl_On_Fire

Ha ha! I'm more approachable online I think. I carry myself like I'm 10 feet tall and bullet-proof. I'm a little thing but I'm mighty.

Actually, online flirting isn't hard for me. It's easy for me to use plain language and little emoticons. I don't have to "read" the person's body language or facial expressions. There's no guesswork. It's cut and dry. I've also been told I flirt all the time but I don't. I'm just kind and friendly to everyone and I guess it gets taken out of context sometimes.

Honestly, at this stage in the game, I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't have the guts to approach me. I'll drop a hankie so-to-speak but you gotta do the rest guys.

I also understand that as well! I really like getting to know you

That's right, it's no fun if you have to do all of the work. You are worth knowing.

I flirt friendly but I am also friendly to everyone so that means sometimes people mistake one for the other. I try to be as clear as possible to avoid mix ups.

I can see how online flirting can be easier than in person. It's easier to crush too probably?

Kent · 02-24-2013, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl_On_Fire

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

Girl_On_Fire:

A smile and eye contact works.. It lets the butch or guy you like know you are receptive and hy/he can approach you..

Kent

Girl_On_Fire · 02-24-2013, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kent

Girl_On_Fire:

A smile and eye contact works.. It lets the butch or guy you like know you are receptive and hy/he can approach you..

Kent

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

TheMerryFairy · 02-24-2013, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl_On_Fire

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

My friend uses this trick - wearing sunglasses. Maybe not in a club but it works so she can look in a general direction of a person, even making it seem like she's keeping eyecontact but really she is looking off to the side. It might help you relax.

Kent · 02-24-2013, 10:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl_On_Fire

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

Girl_On_Fire:

Try the eye contact first and you may not even notice that you are smiling before you know it.. Try it..

Gemme · 09-20-2010, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenny

[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

Very well said -- I couldn't agree more!!!!

I'm just hoping you put that naughty air away when you're flirting with the little old ladies... <G>

You might be surprised how many do like a little naughty with their afternoon tea.

MysticOceansFL · 09-20-2010, 02:52 PM

I'm pretty much myself I don't do anything special that I recall.

09-20-2010, 02:00 PM	#1
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,592 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,894 Times in 4,062 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	now look, butches and transfolks...stop the worrying about approaching us ladies. We are honored when you hike up your belt and saunter on over and cough and say hello. We love that little bit of sweat and fear that goes along with your confidence and courage. Its all there in you and thats what we love so much. Your "mix". We dont need lines or model handsomeness or suave conversation or flashy fashions to impress us. We want to see that look in your eye that says to us silently, that you are in awe of us. For just being us. take it down a notch...dont be so in awe that it paralyzes you. We NEED you...so take a swallow and mosey on over.... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

09-20-2010, 02:05 PM	#3
ravfem Senior Member How Do You Identify?: i'm a girl Relationship Status: negative Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Georgia Posts: 1,811 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,239 Thanked 3,126 Times in 1,270 Posts Rep Power: 1969286	Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence? Should i do some self-examining? __________________

09-20-2010, 05:12 PM	#8
princessbelle Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6,100 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,380 Thanked 30,496 Times in 5,198 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Coolness thread!!! Enjoyed the reading and thinking bout it all. Gosh, flirting, for me, just comes natural as I read some of you feel the same. It is so much easier in person. It is so engaging to walk past someone i find interesting, get the attention, flash a smile and blush at exactly 3 seconds after making eye contact and look away. If all is well at that point then it may be time to offer up a game of pool, lean just right over that pool table and then gaze back to see where the eyes are. If the preliminary flirting is found to be receptive, then it is time to see if intellectually it is a match...if it is..then flirting is even more fun. It's in the walk, the smile, the wording, and the feminine "ways" for me at least. It is just easier in person...it's just natural and man alive is it fun. Online however, I find it very difficult. You can't see how the other person is really responding and i tend to put a lot of "lol"s in my convo just so the other person knows i'm smiling if i'm being a little "over the top" and confident. The jury is still out if i am any good at online flirting i think... But offer me a pool stick, a drink or a great conversation...and it's smooth sailing. __________________ ~ I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

09-20-2010, 02:52 PM	#20
MysticOceansFL Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch, Preferred Pronoun?: People call me by my nic name. Relationship Status: Not Single, Not Desperate. Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Florida Posts: 3,833 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,645 Thanked 4,033 Times in 1,720 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	I'm pretty much myself I don't do anything special that I recall. __________________ Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. It is said, " Some lives are linked across time..... Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "......

09-20-2010, 02:01 PM	#2
MrSunshine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The Gardner Preferred Pronoun?: Ummmm Relationship Status: Nah Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Sunshine State, State of Sunshine Posts: 2,616 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,577 Thanked 3,891 Times in 1,155 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Takes too much energy so I don't do it. If I want something I say so.

02-24-2013, 09:47 PM	#11
little_ms_sunshyne Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: . Posts: 3,312 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,339 Thanked 12,241 Times in 2,541 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	AWKWARD! I have no game. I end up laughing entirely too much out of being nervous, I bite my bottom lip quite a bit, I trip over MYSELF, and it just continues in this awkward sequence of events...Absolutely hopeless!!!!!!!!!