Were you adopted in a closed adoption?

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by bigbutchmistie

YES soooooo much hypocrisy And yes sooooo glad for the travels and experiences I had. Its part of why I am who I am today. I've seen things few people in U.S. Ever do... As I'm sure so have you

Very true!

I am guessing you speak English and Spanish fluently?

There are good parts, but just always this feeling of not belonging anywhere. Always on the outside, always the new kid.

[NotAnAverageGuy]

Honestly, to me, giving away your kids because you can't take care of them properly IS NOT love of any form, it's called being stupid and selfish. I am grateful I am here but at times no due to the amount of anger that boils in my bones about the reasons why so many birthparents do what they do.

It kinda goes back to the post where I said some people need to be sterilized and castrated, both my birth parents should have had this happen, than maybe myself and my siblings wouldn't be so fucked up like we are. I hold alot of resentment and animosity towards my birth mother and some to my father, if you don't wanna be a parent don't be a fucktard, wear a rubber or use some form of protection.

IMO closed adoptions have done more harm than good.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by NotAnAverageGuy

Honestly, to me, giving away your kids because you can't take care of them properly IS NOT love of any form, it's called being stupid and selfish. I am grateful I am here but at times no due to the amount of anger that boils in my bones about the reasons why so many birthparents do what they do.

It kinda goes back to the post where I said some people need to be sterilized and castrated, both my birth parents should have had this happen, than maybe myself and my siblings wouldn't be so fucked up like we are. I hold alot of resentment and animosity towards my birth mother and some to my father, if you don't wanna be a parent don't be a fucktard, wear a rubber or use some form of protection.

IMO closed adoptions have done more harm than good.

I think a more open scenario where the child knows where they come from and has some sense of heritage is best.

Those of us from closed adoptions have no clue what our past is, no sense of clan, or familial ties.

I get that in 1963 things were bad for women, but when I finally did meet her she told me her parents said she had to give me up if she wanted to go to the prom. They she married someone else shortly after and had 2 kids. She has a master's degree. In my case it was a convenience thing, not a survival thing.

I do know that still the rhetoric is that to say that parents gave us up out of love and should be happy and thankful and beholden for being adopted out of misery. I have heard it all my life.

I think I am angry at society in general for believing that children are disposable and will forget and can be given away when they are at their most defenceless to who knows what. Having sex is a natural thing, and I wish I lived in a world where children are treasured and not looked down on for being illegitimate. Its just insane to me that this is how society works.

[NotAnAverageGuy]

[QUOTE=apocalipstic;22864]I think a more open scenario where the child knows where they come from and has some sense of heritage is best.

Those of us from closed adoptions have no clue what our past is, no sense of clan, or familial ties.

I get that in 1963 things were bad for women, but when I finally did meet her she told me her parents said she had to give me up if she wanted to go to the prom. They she married someone else shortly after and had 2 kids. She has a master's degree. In my case it was a convenience thing, not a survival thing.

I do know that still the rhetoric is that to say that parents gave us up out of love and should be happy and thankful and beholden for being adopted out of misery. I have heard it all my life.

I think I am angry at society in general for believing that children are disposable and will forget and can be given away when they are at their most defenceless to who knows what. Having sex is a natural thing, and I wish I lived in a world where children are treasured and not looked down on for being illegitimate. Its just insane to me that this is how society works.[/QUOTE]

[NotAnAverageGuy]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

I think a more open scenario where the child knows where they come from and has some sense of heritage is best.

Those of us from closed adoptions have no clue what our past is, no sense of clan, or familial ties.

I get that in 1963 things were bad for women, but when I finally did meet her she told me her parents said she had to give me up if she wanted to go to the prom. They she married someone else shortly after and had 2 kids. She has a master's degree. In my case it was a convenience thing, not a survival thing.

I do know that still the rhetoric is that to say that parents gave us up out of love and should be happy and thankful and beholden for being adopted out of misery. I have heard it all my life.

I think I am angry at society in general for believing that children are disposable and will forget and can be given away when they are at their most defenceless to who knows what. Having sex is a natural thing, and I wish I lived in a world where children are treasured and not looked down on for being illegitimate. Its just insane to me that this is how society works.

That too is a thorn in my side, thinking kids are disposable as well as animals.

Society sucks and always has

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by NotAnAverageGuy

That too is a thorn in my side, thinking kids are disposable as well as animals.

Society sucks and always has

Yeah animals too. People need to get their pets FIXED.

It makes me furious that when someone is pregnant STILL, the answer people give is ohh don't have an abortion, have the baby and put it up for adoption. People need to know that they are placing a defenceless child in danger.

Yes, some babies end up in good homes, but so many end up on death row or commit suicide, or even kill their adoptive parents. Is it worth it?

Use birth control.

[NotAnAverageGuy]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Yeah animals too. People need to get their pets FIXED.

It makes me furious that when someone is pregnant STILL, the answer people give is ohh don't have an abortion, have the baby and put it up for adoption. People need to know that they are placing a defenceless child in danger.

Yes, some babies end up in good homes, but so many end up on death row or commit suicide, or even kill their adoptive parents. Is it worth it?

Use birth control.

Agreed get your damn pets fixed... sheesh it don't take much to get them fixed... humans on the other hand you have to have a valid reason to get them fixed.

I recall a story about an adoptive girl who killed her adopted mother over a boyfriend at school. WTF.

People should think with their heads when it comes to having kids, why do you think I have never had kids?

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by NotAnAverageGuy

Agreed get your damn pets fixed... sheesh it don't take much to get them fixed... humans on the other hand you have to have a valid reason to get them fixed.

I recall a story about an adoptive girl who killed her adopted mother over a boyfriend at school. WTF.

People should think with their heads when it comes to having kids, why do you think I have never had kids?

I never really wanted to have kids either.

I read that a huge percentage of people who kill both parents are adopted. They don't want parents looking to adopt to know this stuff.

[bigbutchmistie]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Very true!

I am guessing you speak English and Spanish fluently?

There are good parts, but just always this feeling of not belonging anywhere. Always on the outside, always the new kid.

Actually I dont speak Spanish fluently. I understand some. Just dont speak it. We had to let the missionaries talk to the people. Weird. I know.

As far as having kids. Ya know, I never have wanted to have them. And in dating it sooo hard to find a girly girl who doesnt want them either. Oh well. I know there has still gotta be a single femme out there who doesnt want them