Grieving

MsTinkerbelly · 11-19-2010, 01:43 PM

To say that I really enjoy reading what everyone has to say might seem a bit odd....but, I feel like I'm not alone.

Blessings to all-

Cindy

JakeTulane · 11-19-2010, 03:22 PM

I just got off the phone with My friend Christie awhile ago. I had not spoken to her in a month or so. She is one of My friends, where we do not talk every day yet we know the other is there. So, I called her just to see how she was doing.

I knew right away by the tone of her voice something was wrong. Her Mom passed away just two days ago. Apparently she choked on something, and they were not able to get the ambulance to her house in time.. she was pronounced dead by the time they got her to the ER.

I cried on the phone with her. Again, all the memories came flooding back of the losses I have experienced. One particular.

Many years ago I lost an ex to suicide. Robyn. I can vividly remember the day I received the phone call at My work from her Dad. I was heading to a meeting and My director had answered the phone and said it was for Me. I was working for the DOD at the time and had just been handed a file of classified material that you must read right away, sign off on it, and pass it along or shred it if you are the last on the list for reading. I told My Director, please not now, can you take a message. He said, "It is a gentleman and he is crying."

The whole conversation with her Dad.. was Why? Did she show any signs to Me that she was unhappy? Anything at all that would have led Me to think she wanted to take her life? There was nothing. I had no clue. No forewarning. We were about to move into a home together. We had picked it out together. She had left her job as an airline stewardess and was working for a great law firm. She "seemed" to be so happy. We were so happy.

She left a note - telling her parents that she loved them, that she loved Me..and she wanted to be buried with a necklace I had purchased for her.

To this day I still wonder why. Was there something I did not see? Was there something I could have done to prevent it?

I have only talked about losing her to My family and a couple of others. I have held in the feeling of guilt for so long..

I am letting it go here..

Thank you for everyone that is sharing.

Especially InfiniteFemme.. because of your post.. I decided to write this all down.

naturlover_52 · 11-21-2010, 07:46 PM

Take all the time you need to grieve Cody and I just love the pic that you put up....As many of you know that I lost my Mom a yr ago at the beginning of this month. IT is still really hard for me and this yr IT will be really weird due to the fact that all of us have pretty much Scattered w/ the wind. I do have my Brother and MY kid who is grown and her mom and MY dad to talk to but also Dad. But w/ Dad it is hard because he is dealing w/ His Alzheimer's. Also getting ready for this holiday I will finally having a tree Because my animals will not be w/ me. Had to Give them up too, because I am moving to a place that doesn't allow them and Also right now I am not able to care for them like I could. I am lucky that no kill shelters were found for ALL three of them and that the 2 kitties get to go to the same place. The cats won't be together very long because I can see the smaller of the 2 being adopted fairly quickly because she is such a lover. I am just grateful that they will be taken care of And I won't have to worry. Yes, this has been a yr of Hard knocks.
take care all and thanks for letting me rant.

MsTinkerbelly · 11-22-2010, 08:59 AM

This is a really tough time of year for a lot of people, whether they have lost someone or not. First of all, be good to yourselves...do what you need to get through it/enjoy it/survive it.

My Sister has handled the loss of my Mom by headed to the river with her boyfriend and kids for the holiday....I debated long and hard on what to do this year so not only could I survive it, I could even enjoy it.

So we are having Thanksgiving Dinner for our little family and a few friends, and then Friday we are heading to Palm Springs and a nice resort until Sunday. New traditions....but missing my Mom so much all I want to do is stand in one place and scream/cry/beg God for one more day with her.

Andrew, Jr. · 11-22-2010, 09:52 AM

Rosie's Aunt died yesterday. She was in her 60's, but had many health problems. This is really a blessing. Family is flying in from Calif. today. Tomorrow is the funeral. It should be today - following the traditional Jewish belief. Getting plane tickets is way to hard right now with the holiday.

Andrew

Mr. Moon · 11-22-2010, 06:14 PM

Oh Woodie! Please hug her for me! I am so so sorry!
Let me know if you need anything ok??

Sure is a bad time of year for all this.

Hang in there.
xo,
Moonie

Andrew, Jr. · 11-23-2010, 01:55 PM

When it rains, it pours. I just shake my head. It just never stops. We need a break for sure.

Thanks Mr. Moon!

11-21-2010, 07:46 PM	#3
naturlover_52 Member How Do You Identify?: soft butch/bi Preferred Pronoun?: she and her are just fine....Sweetcheeks hey you Relationship Status: seeing someone long distance but soon will be both in Ca love her very much Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: So Calif East San Gabrielle Valley aka the land of shake and bake Posts: 108 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 85 Thanked 89 Times in 44 Posts Rep Power: 3426	Cody Take all the time you need to grieve Cody and I just love the pic that you put up....As many of you know that I lost my Mom a yr ago at the beginning of this month. IT is still really hard for me and this yr IT will be really weird due to the fact that all of us have pretty much Scattered w/ the wind. I do have my Brother and MY kid who is grown and her mom and MY dad to talk to but also Dad. But w/ Dad it is hard because he is dealing w/ His Alzheimer's. Also getting ready for this holiday I will finally having a tree Because my animals will not be w/ me. Had to Give them up too, because I am moving to a place that doesn't allow them and Also right now I am not able to care for them like I could. I am lucky that no kill shelters were found for ALL three of them and that the 2 kitties get to go to the same place. The cats won't be together very long because I can see the smaller of the 2 being adopted fairly quickly because she is such a lover. I am just grateful that they will be taken care of And I won't have to worry. Yes, this has been a yr of Hard knocks. take care all and thanks for letting me rant.

11-19-2010, 01:43 PM	#1
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,901 Times in 5,017 Posts Rep Power: 0	To say that I really enjoy reading what everyone has to say might seem a bit odd....but, I feel like I'm not alone. Blessings to all- Cindy

11-19-2010, 03:22 PM	#2
JakeTulane Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Mr. Prickly Porcupine Preferred Pronoun?: Butch - Hy, Hym, Hys Relationship Status: She has softened My quills Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Permanently Banned 8/8/2011 Posts: 4,880 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,221 Thanked 5,264 Times in 2,732 Posts Rep Power: 0	I just got off the phone with My friend Christie awhile ago. I had not spoken to her in a month or so. She is one of My friends, where we do not talk every day yet we know the other is there. So, I called her just to see how she was doing. I knew right away by the tone of her voice something was wrong. Her Mom passed away just two days ago. Apparently she choked on something, and they were not able to get the ambulance to her house in time.. she was pronounced dead by the time they got her to the ER. I cried on the phone with her. Again, all the memories came flooding back of the losses I have experienced. One particular. Many years ago I lost an ex to suicide. Robyn. I can vividly remember the day I received the phone call at My work from her Dad. I was heading to a meeting and My director had answered the phone and said it was for Me. I was working for the DOD at the time and had just been handed a file of classified material that you must read right away, sign off on it, and pass it along or shred it if you are the last on the list for reading. I told My Director, please not now, can you take a message. He said, "It is a gentleman and he is crying." The whole conversation with her Dad.. was Why? Did she show any signs to Me that she was unhappy? Anything at all that would have led Me to think she wanted to take her life? There was nothing. I had no clue. No forewarning. We were about to move into a home together. We had picked it out together. She had left her job as an airline stewardess and was working for a great law firm. She "seemed" to be so happy. We were so happy. She left a note - telling her parents that she loved them, that she loved Me..and she wanted to be buried with a necklace I had purchased for her. To this day I still wonder why. Was there something I did not see? Was there something I could have done to prevent it? I have only talked about losing her to My family and a couple of others. I have held in the feeling of guilt for so long.. I am letting it go here.. Thank you for everyone that is sharing. Especially InfiniteFemme.. because of your post.. I decided to write this all down.

11-22-2010, 08:59 AM	#4
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,901 Times in 5,017 Posts Rep Power: 0	This is a really tough time of year for a lot of people, whether they have lost someone or not. First of all, be good to yourselves...do what you need to get through it/enjoy it/survive it. My Sister has handled the loss of my Mom by headed to the river with her boyfriend and kids for the holiday....I debated long and hard on what to do this year so not only could I survive it, I could even enjoy it. So we are having Thanksgiving Dinner for our little family and a few friends, and then Friday we are heading to Palm Springs and a nice resort until Sunday. New traditions....but missing my Mom so much all I want to do is stand in one place and scream/cry/beg God for one more day with her.

11-22-2010, 09:52 AM	#5
Andrew, Jr. Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Me Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Over the Rainbow in a House Posts: 5,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,004 Thanked 5,249 Times in 2,216 Posts Rep Power: 0	Rosie's Aunt died yesterday. She was in her 60's, but had many health problems. This is really a blessing. Family is flying in from Calif. today. Tomorrow is the funeral. It should be today - following the traditional Jewish belief. Getting plane tickets is way to hard right now with the holiday. Andrew

11-22-2010, 06:14 PM	#6
Mr. Moon Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: he, she, it, hey you Relationship Status: single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Maryland Posts: 329 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 636 Thanked 1,160 Times in 229 Posts Rep Power: 10385664	Oh Woodie! Please hug her for me! I am so so sorry! Let me know if you need anything ok?? Sure is a bad time of year for all this. Hang in there. xo, Moonie

11-23-2010, 01:55 PM	#7
Andrew, Jr. Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Me Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Over the Rainbow in a House Posts: 5,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,004 Thanked 5,249 Times in 2,216 Posts Rep Power: 0	When it rains, it pours. I just shake my head. It just never stops. We need a break for sure. Thanks Mr. Moon!