02-08-2011, 07:58 PM | #41 |
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I got distracted while posting earlier and I forgot something about colors.
There's a strong influence with pride and colors. Red/white/blue have been taught to us to equal national pride. The colors of one's flag of origin usually brings forth pride. With the superbowl as an example, there's even a song on the radio RIGHT NOW depicting the link between color and pride...."Black and yellow"...about the Steelers and Pittsburgh pride. |
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02-08-2011, 08:03 PM | #42 |
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I did not experience the eating after a funeral until I came to America, where I came from the body layed out at the family home, people came to visit, bringing food, drink, candles, and herbs and dried plants to help with transition. Occasionally a live chicken made an appearance, but it wasn't for dinner. The food was brought the family could do body vigils, pray, etc. without the family having to worry about that task, laundry was done by the ladies in the neighborhood. In other words word... I dunno
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02-08-2011, 08:07 PM | #43 |
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Food is comfort. That's why the obesity rate is so out of control. Speaking of control.....a lot of folks feel out of control where death is concerned. Food, they feel they can control. Ergo, food gives folks a sense of comfort and/or control is a very emotionally charged time.
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02-08-2011, 08:08 PM | #44 |
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Ok, my Big Question is, will I ever find love again at this stage of my life? Well, astonishingly enough, I have.
I am 68, but have been told that I look 10 to 15 years younger - I hope so. My new love is 10 years younger. We have not met in realtime yet, and I am hoping that he will not be disappointed. I yearn to be in his arms, and to begin our lives together. I pray all will go well - wish me luck.
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02-08-2011, 08:09 PM | #45 |
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I know when my father died and then my brother, my mom's house was packed with people. We all cried and told stories about them. But, then what. You just sorta sit around. Well, people do get hungry and it is one less thing for the "family" to have to deal with if people bring food for everyone to eat. It takes the burdon off of the family to worry about entertaining guests....even in that situation ...you still worry bout that.
Also, food is comfort. Most importantly probably it is a way of showing love to the family. A way of reaching out to them and feeling that you've done "something".
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02-08-2011, 08:13 PM | #46 | |
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Congrats!!
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02-08-2011, 08:16 PM | #47 | |
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Yes, my love, I can see and understand that. I've attended many wakes - Puerto Rican's wakes are no different from Irish wakes - lots of food, liquor and reminises and jokes. What the closest of us to the 'dearly departed' will never regain, is the love and warmth, and yes, the bad aspects of them we will miss...
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02-08-2011, 08:20 PM | #48 | |
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Do you know why we eat after funerals?
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02-08-2011, 08:21 PM | #49 |
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02-08-2011, 08:23 PM | #50 |
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Because we can...? We're still alive and able to do so. Not so much for those we've buried.
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02-08-2011, 08:35 PM | #51 | |
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You have definately been to a clone family of mine. Cajun's lay the body out a love oned, stay up all night (hence the term *wake*) fasting and having rituals (bring your own chicken style)... . bury the dearly departed the next day and then have a huge buffet style free for all feast. Everyone brings some yummy dishes to the feast and tends to the mourning family for a while doing chores and errands... and of course lots of drinking.. What a sendoff |
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02-08-2011, 08:42 PM | #52 |
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I am going to guess we eat after funerals out of necessity.
I am going to go back to the agrian time to pre-industrial where towns were popping up and neighbors pulled together. Deaths were a family matter, the dead kept at home, bathed and clothed and presented at the house. Relatives were given notice to come see and pay their respects. Sometimes it was a long buggy drive. People came hungry. Locals brought food to help feed the kin and friends. They also chipped in and took care of the farm chores too. Feeding horses, collecting eggs, milking cows. These things all had to be done. Animals dont care if someone died. An udder is full and needs expressed. People chipped in and helped out with that too. We just dont have something similar to that in today's lifestyle to follow suit like we do with eating. People still come from far away and need fed....at least, thats how it all started.
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02-08-2011, 09:30 PM | #53 |
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My big question? I am falling for a beautiful mature lady.
She is smart and attentive. Oh and did I mention Sexy as all heck I need to wear my hat because there is fire in the house. LOL My question is will she want me as her guy for keeps?
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02-09-2011, 11:27 AM | #54 |
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it's funny, i was just talking about the rituals surrounding death & funerals recently.... when i was young, the body was brought to the house (and in the case of my uncle, a soldier who died in Vietnam, a soldier came with the body and stayed there at the house, beside the casket the entire time).
Everyone, whether they knew the family or not, brought food. So much that a lot of it was thrown out eventually. i think that some of it is that, at least in the culture i grew up in, you offer food at any & all occasions, happy or sad, as a way to socialize, show respect, love & either sympathy or congratulations. i remember more than one occasion when a family member would say something like, "i have to fix something to take with me before i can go over there", and also, "did you see that so&so didn't even bring a store bought cake?!" It just wasn't done, especially store-bought stuff! my granny fed us til we couldn't eat another thing & then kept trying to push food on us... it was her only way of showing love.
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Last edited by ravfem; 02-09-2011 at 11:29 AM. Reason: oops, just bothered to read back in the thread....seeing that Blade also asked.... :seeingstars: |
02-09-2011, 11:31 AM | #55 | |
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I hope so tickets are bought!! Good luck and congrats!!
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02-09-2011, 12:54 PM | #56 |
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02-09-2011, 01:07 PM | #57 | |
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and we do this today, in America, in the body and blood of Christ...at communion...a small ritual revolving around a funeral
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02-27-2011, 11:17 AM | #58 |
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Sunday Feb 27
Question 2/27
What's the fine line between seeing that your needs are met and being selfish?
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02-27-2011, 11:45 AM | #59 | |
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I think i probably struggle with this one. I tend to be on the "oh i'm ok, no problems" side rather than risk appearing selfish. But in doing that it is also performing an injustice to myself. I agree it is a fine line and I admit i need to work on this one. Thanks for the question!!!!
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02-27-2011, 11:55 AM | #60 |
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I am not sure if that fine line can be identified because it seems both those things would be in a constant state of relativity with each other. I guess finding a balance between both would be a start.
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