For those for whom Mother's Day is not a Good Day

ruthie14 · 05-07-2011, 08:51 AM

Andrew.. Came on today to bump this thread only to find you already had! THANKS soooo much!

This weekend is proving harder than I thought it would be. Keeping busy with friends. Went out last night and a lesbian couple I know brought out thier baby girl. Tiny little thing. Sweet as can be. Held her for a while and was ok at that time, but now all I can think about is why did God forget about me. I teach 1 years olds everyday.... see more neglect than I care to think about . I believe in God, but He is gonna have to fill me in on this decision of His when I see Him.

Step children still not talking to me. I expect no phone call or card to come from anyone. I have mothered hundreds in my life, yet mother to no one. Breaks my heart.

I will go out today to the farmers market I love which just opened for the season today. Get my nails done. Then go to a friends house for the Kentucky derby.

Tomorrow I will have to put up a good front for my Mom.. stiff upper lip. Smile as my heart is breaking. I will do my best... hopefully it will be good enough.

ruthie14 · 05-07-2011, 11:31 AM

bumping this thread..

MsTinkerbelly · 05-07-2011, 12:06 PM

I am sitting here feeling so weepy and sad, wishing I had known last year with my mom was going to be my last. I know that I am blessed beyond words to have my lovely daughter with me, and I think I am going to pull myself out of this funk and plan something fun for her.

Hug someone you love folks while you still can.

MsTinkerbelly · 05-07-2011, 12:10 PM

Thank you Ruthie for reminding me that I have so much more than I lost. I hope you find a way to be at peace tomorrow, and I am sending you a huge hug. (((((((Ruthie))))))

ruthie14 · 05-07-2011, 08:59 PM

Peace would be wonderful!

RockOn · 05-07-2011, 09:45 PM

For those of you who, for various reasons, experience difficulty regarding Mother's Day, I send you my compassion. Hugs too!

My mom passed in '84. I don't think anything about Mother's Day except it is just another day. Both my parents were alcoholic. Charlie (father) was very violent and physically abusive. How sad to live life so mad and angry all the time. It was a hell of a ride growing up with those two clowns - you never knew what was about to happen. Dull moments were unheard of. These poor souls never sought recovery - their choice ... so the insanity rocked on.

I will be 55 years old this summer. When I was about 31 years old, I am so thankful I had a moment of clarity and sought help ... started my recovery path for my alcohol/drug addictions. I cut the demons off at the pass.
Recovery is a pretty good deal!

Mtn · 05-07-2011, 11:15 PM

I lost my beautiful, amazing, oldest daughter this past July to ovarian cancer, 2 days short of her 32nd birthday. I have been in major denial about it being Mother's Day, so much so that I failed to plan a Mother's Day Special for the little restaurant I run, oops. I was a "step-parent", but she was "mine". After she got sick, was when she started calling me "Ma". Sweetest word I ever heard. I would like tomorrow to pass quickly, please and thank you. I also recently had to send my mother to go live with my brother, after caring for her for over 20 years. Her dementia is progressing rapidly and I just couldn't keep her safe with me anymore, and unfortunately the transition is not going well on that front, my brother tells me she cries for me. I am grateful for the loving understanding people I have in my life (love you Syl) that are gonna let me take a pass on the day. Hugs around to all that feel pain on this day... and squeeze them (Mothers and children) if you can! PEACE

Bard · 05-09-2011, 08:48 AM

Well Abigail called to sing happy mothers day to me and make me laugh.. I also got some very sweet texts from the guys at work and a hug and flower from my 1stSGT when we signed in at drill. Desd took me to dinner on the way home and I had a wonderful talk with Jenn my step- mom on the way home. I tried in my rater clumsy way to express to her what she means to me Bu I think she gets it.. when she and my Dad come for the wedding we are going to see skyler so I can show her the four legged grandchild..

Apocalipstic · 05-09-2011, 09:11 AM

Well, we made it another year!

Love to all of us! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoox

05-07-2011, 11:15 PM	#7
Mtn Member How Do You Identify?: Stone butch, daddy type Relationship Status: sylvie calls me her studmuffin Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: OR Posts: 691 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,005 Thanked 3,834 Times in 617 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	I lost my beautiful, amazing, oldest daughter this past July to ovarian cancer, 2 days short of her 32nd birthday. I have been in major denial about it being Mother's Day, so much so that I failed to plan a Mother's Day Special for the little restaurant I run, oops. I was a "step-parent", but she was "mine". After she got sick, was when she started calling me "Ma". Sweetest word I ever heard. I would like tomorrow to pass quickly, please and thank you. I also recently had to send my mother to go live with my brother, after caring for her for over 20 years. Her dementia is progressing rapidly and I just couldn't keep her safe with me anymore, and unfortunately the transition is not going well on that front, my brother tells me she cries for me. I am grateful for the loving understanding people I have in my life (love you Syl) that are gonna let me take a pass on the day. Hugs around to all that feel pain on this day... and squeeze them (Mothers and children) if you can! PEACE __________________ If you don't sleep in my bed, or sign my paycheck, your opinion probably does not matter to me...

05-09-2011, 08:48 AM	#8
Bard Family Man How Do You Identify?: TG Male Preferred Pronoun?: Masculine ones Relationship Status: She just gets me Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ..... Posts: 2,828 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,997 Thanked 12,786 Times in 2,431 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Well Abigail called to sing happy mothers day to me and make me laugh.. I also got some very sweet texts from the guys at work and a hug and flower from my 1stSGT when we signed in at drill. Desd took me to dinner on the way home and I had a wonderful talk with Jenn my step- mom on the way home. I tried in my rater clumsy way to express to her what she means to me Bu I think she gets it.. when she and my Dad come for the wedding we are going to see skyler so I can show her the four legged grandchild.. __________________ This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name! Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh - erotic nightmares beyond any measure, and sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Don't dream it, be it.

05-09-2011, 09:11 AM	#9
Apocalipstic Pink Confection How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, Ma'am Relationship Status: Dating Myself Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Nashville Posts: 4,266 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17,195 Thanked 11,362 Times in 2,838 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Well, we made it another year! Love to all of us! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoox __________________

05-07-2011, 08:51 AM	#1
ruthie14 Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: NJ Posts: 844 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,904 Thanked 1,245 Times in 461 Posts Rep Power: 5946335	Andrew.. Came on today to bump this thread only to find you already had! THANKS soooo much! This weekend is proving harder than I thought it would be. Keeping busy with friends. Went out last night and a lesbian couple I know brought out thier baby girl. Tiny little thing. Sweet as can be. Held her for a while and was ok at that time, but now all I can think about is why did God forget about me. I teach 1 years olds everyday.... see more neglect than I care to think about . I believe in God, but He is gonna have to fill me in on this decision of His when I see Him. Step children still not talking to me. I expect no phone call or card to come from anyone. I have mothered hundreds in my life, yet mother to no one. Breaks my heart. I will go out today to the farmers market I love which just opened for the season today. Get my nails done. Then go to a friends house for the Kentucky derby. Tomorrow I will have to put up a good front for my Mom.. stiff upper lip. Smile as my heart is breaking. I will do my best... hopefully it will be good enough.

05-07-2011, 11:31 AM	#2
ruthie14 Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: NJ Posts: 844 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,904 Thanked 1,245 Times in 461 Posts Rep Power: 5946335	bumping this thread..

05-07-2011, 12:06 PM	#3
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,907 Times in 5,017 Posts Rep Power: 0	I am sitting here feeling so weepy and sad, wishing I had known last year with my mom was going to be my last. I know that I am blessed beyond words to have my lovely daughter with me, and I think I am going to pull myself out of this funk and plan something fun for her. Hug someone you love folks while you still can.

05-07-2011, 12:10 PM	#4
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,907 Times in 5,017 Posts Rep Power: 0	Thank you Ruthie for reminding me that I have so much more than I lost. I hope you find a way to be at peace tomorrow, and I am sending you a huge hug. (((((((Ruthie))))))

05-07-2011, 08:59 PM	#5
ruthie14 Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: NJ Posts: 844 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,904 Thanked 1,245 Times in 461 Posts Rep Power: 5946335	Peace would be wonderful!

05-07-2011, 09:45 PM	#6
RockOn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: sitting over there ----->>>>> :) Preferred Pronoun?: .... Relationship Status: .... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: .... Posts: 3,522 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,081 Thanked 10,304 Times in 2,610 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	For those of you who, for various reasons, experience difficulty regarding Mother's Day, I send you my compassion. Hugs too! My mom passed in '84. I don't think anything about Mother's Day except it is just another day. Both my parents were alcoholic. Charlie (father) was very violent and physically abusive. How sad to live life so mad and angry all the time. It was a hell of a ride growing up with those two clowns - you never knew what was about to happen. Dull moments were unheard of. These poor souls never sought recovery - their choice ... so the insanity rocked on. I will be 55 years old this summer. When I was about 31 years old, I am so thankful I had a moment of clarity and sought help ... started my recovery path for my alcohol/drug addictions. I cut the demons off at the pass. Recovery is a pretty good deal!