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Old 05-22-2011, 09:00 AM   #1
Mister Bent
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Default Pretty much it's exactly like this.



"stuck on the porn phase."

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Old 05-22-2011, 09:25 AM   #2
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I think too, it's important to understand that the other person may not grieve for the same length as you do. Just because they have moved on to another relationship doesn't necessarilly mean they aren't grieving some of the loss of the relationship as well.

Someone mentioned earliler too that the person ending the relationship may not grieve, but I disagree. They still grieve the loss of what they thought they had, the future they were hoping to make, and the time they may have invested in this relationship before realizing that it wasn't quite the right one.

So yes we all grieve, and that's ok.

A
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Old 05-22-2011, 03:17 PM   #3
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^ agree totally.
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Old 05-23-2011, 05:33 PM   #4
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Default It's also a lot like this.


And you just have to get over it.



I'm not going to think about how for a long time it really seemed like it was going to work out.



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Old 05-29-2011, 06:24 AM   #5
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There are places I remember,all my life though some have changed. Some forever not for better,some have gone and some remain. All these places have their moments with lovers and friends I can recall. Some are dead and some are living in my life i've loved them all - The Beatles.
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Old 08-27-2011, 05:48 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by pajara2 View Post
I think too, it's important to understand that the other person may not grieve for the same length as you do. Just because they have moved on to another relationship doesn't necessarilly mean they aren't grieving some of the loss of the relationship as well.

Someone mentioned earliler too that the person ending the relationship may not grieve, but I disagree. They still grieve the loss of what they thought they had, the future they were hoping to make, and the time they may have invested in this relationship before realizing that it wasn't quite the right one.

So yes we all grieve, and that's ok.

A
Agree. I coped with a horrendous breakup once by jumping into a new relationship. I ended up grieving for 2 years! I knew I was better when I could finally look at my life and want something more for myself.
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Old 08-27-2011, 08:18 AM   #7
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I haven't seen hind nor hair of my wife since last Spring. She's probably camping in a corn field waiting for the Mother Ship If anyone meets a femme who claims to be the first gay woman Jesus, that's my wife... Tell her to come home please

















No regrets..just love.
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Old 08-27-2011, 10:09 AM   #8
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There are so many layers of healing I have discovered.

It is as though I were an onion, pulling/tearing off layer by layer.

The first one was the bitter pill of betrayal that repeated unfaithfulness did to both my outer layer as well as the deepest core of me.

This bitter, angry layer was healed and acceptance of what was, and choices I made, soon followed.

Somehow, I thought that once I reached peace, acceptance and the end of outward grieving; I could move on.

Only to find...

that the very core of my onion self is so scarred by all of those years, that I have truly lost the ability to trust myself, my own feelings, the love and care of another. I am so unsure that I will recognize goodness again that I am fearful if pulling off the scar tissue that protects the core of me.

My intellect tells me clearly life holds no guarantees and surely my life has proven nothing but this idiom to be true, but my emotions, that ability to once again open my heart totally and completely, are fused with that scar tissue and I fear tearing it off so much it terrifies me.

I just do not know at the point if I fear living alone for the rest of my life more than I do the fear of believing once again that I just might chose a person of goodness and worthy of my trust.

I used to know so clearly who I was and that I could make good and healthy choices for myself. I just do not trust me anymore.
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Old 08-27-2011, 10:32 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pajara2 View Post
I think too, it's important to understand that the other person may not grieve for the same length as you do. Just because they have moved on to another relationship doesn't necessarilly mean they aren't grieving some of the loss of the relationship as well.

Someone mentioned earliler too that the person ending the relationship may not grieve, but I disagree. They still grieve the loss of what they thought they had, the future they were hoping to make, and the time they may have invested in this relationship before realizing that it wasn't quite the right one.

So yes we all grieve, and that's ok.

A
This is a great point. I also think that its important to remember that the relationship just doesn't go sour overnight and that the person ending the relationship may have been grieving the loss of their relationship for awhile, and the other just not caring enough to notice and taking the relationship for granted.
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Old 08-27-2011, 11:31 AM   #10
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Originally Posted by Mister Bent View Post


"stuck on the porn phase."

Right now alone seems way less stressful.
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Old 08-27-2011, 11:56 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by apocalipstic View Post
Right now alone seems way less stressful.
Oh, just love this! I went through phases one and two and skipped to parts of phase 5 (cyberdyke.com anyone?).

Thanks, I needed this today
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