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06-19-2011, 03:44 AM
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#1 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
male identified butch Relationship Status:
Married 
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Location: Sweden
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I don't think I acctually have to say anything to my woman, my eyes say it all. And yes, I know she belives in them...
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"Vivamus, mea Lesbia, atque amemus"  |
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06-19-2011, 04:24 AM
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#2 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul. 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust
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Quote:
 But, it's true...I always know the compliment is sincere when I can see that glow in their eyes....regardless of who it is from. You know...there's a difference in "you look nice honey" and "YOU ARE GORGEOUS!" *Smiling*
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In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-19-2011, 04:28 AM
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#3 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul.
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust
Posts: 1,026
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Oh! And! It never hurts to change the compliments up from time to time.
I used to struggle with what to call my butch when she went to all sorts of trouble to look amazing..and I wanted her to know I noticed..and it worked! She ids female, so Handsome didn't feel right with her. Beautiful wasn't gonna cut it for her esteem. Finally, Striking rolled off my tongue..and it stuck. Now, I take my own advice and use other words, but I tend to stick to that safe middle ground where I don't feminize her (as a butch) and don't masculanize her (as a woman). So far, so good!  (does anyone find it interesting that "Feminize" is a word but "Masculanize" is not? And is my brain just too tired, or is there a better word out there??)
__________________
In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-19-2011, 05:01 AM
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#4 |
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Senior Member
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Country Boi Preferred Pronoun?:
call it as u see it Relationship Status:
Completely...complete ;)  Join Date: Aug 2010
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hmmmm ....feminize, womanize....but no male id 'ize' words...
Anyway....YES! Mix it up .... & u look good or fine is never enough. Hott, sexy, beautiful.....looking at her & asking if we HAVE to go...lol all work My favorite look on Sunshyne just gets a "can I just look at u?" Almost speechless response
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"You don't Find life worth living; You MAKE IT that way" |
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06-19-2011, 08:36 AM
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#5 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce 
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Quote:
 when a simple you look amazing, awesome, delicious, breathtaking, terrific, lovely, etc. would do, and do much better.There is a difference between a compliment and reassurance. |
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06-19-2011, 10:34 AM
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#6 |
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Member
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Rainbow femme Preferred Pronoun?:
princess Relationship Status:
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I don't understand gendered compliments or insults. To me, everyone is equally beautiful or a slut
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It is not worth an intelligent person's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that. |
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10-03-2011, 01:03 PM
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#7 | |
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Junior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Feminine Lesbian Woman Preferred Pronoun?:
just dont refer to me as a 'YOU PEOPLE' or say'HEY YOU' to me Relationship Status:
single 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Folsom CA.
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compliments
Quote:
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Intriguinglyours 
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06-19-2011, 02:55 PM
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#8 | |
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Member
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Femme Relationship Status:
rainbows! 
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Quote:
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06-19-2011, 04:20 PM
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#9 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul.
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust
Posts: 1,026
Thanks: 6,890
Thanked 2,362 Times in 697 Posts
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I agree with all of the above, just simply stating that for my butch handsome nor beautiful were right.
__________________
In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-21-2011, 09:45 AM
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#10 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce
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Quote:
Hiya Heart.... Your post made me think about how the use and misuse of language shapes our self-concept, and our understanding of ourselves in the world, in overt and covert ways. Gender training starts at birth. A zillion old and new studies confirm that: Boy and girl babies are spoken to and treated differently, described TO themselves differently, by care givers and the world around them. This profoundly affects self-perception; our understanding of who we are in a gendered world. I often wonder how I might have evolved had I not been tagged a "tomboy" in childhood. I suspect I would have been spared certain inorganic experiences and freed to explore others that were more organic to me. We become unwitting (if not witting) agents of dominant culture constructs/values when we use it's language to describe ourselves and one another. As always, thanks for the thought provoking post, Heart. |
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06-22-2011, 02:58 AM
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#11 | |
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Junior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Feminine Lesbian Woman Preferred Pronoun?:
just dont refer to me as a 'YOU PEOPLE' or say'HEY YOU' to me Relationship Status:
single
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Folsom CA.
Posts: 76
Thanks: 110
Thanked 133 Times in 55 Posts
Rep Power: 289028 |
Quote:
.gif "Say What?") But with an opinion.
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Intriguinglyours
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06-22-2011, 12:03 PM
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#12 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New York
Posts: 265
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Thanked 756 Times in 189 Posts
Rep Power: 8194252 |
Hi, Intrigue_in916
Thank you for the discourse. And, thanks for giving me an opportunity to speak to something that has been on my mind, though it's not directed at you, per se. Quote:
FOR ME, the pronoun dilemma is a symptom of a false presence-absence dichotomy - a byproduct of Western logocentrical thought, linguistics, and representation. Terms like good/bad, white/black, male/female, him/her (ad infinitum) were coined to denote "binary opposition". It is a long, established fact that Westerners (like us) think and speak in oppositions. Butches like me make a lie of binary oppositions; in this case, the binary opposition of gender constructs. Feminism, post-colonialism, post-anarchism, and critical race theory argue that binary dichotomies perpetuate and legitimize Western power structures that place "civilized" white men at the top of contrived hierarchies. Post-structural (not post-modern) butches like me are not interested in a reversal of binary constructs, but their deconstruction. I don't care that this is not necessarily so for all butches. I do care that it's true for butches like me. Not to assert this is to render myself, and those like me, invisible. I'm not masculine or feminine, I'm Butch. My definition of Butch need not comport with anyone else's. (I'm not comfortable with the term "Two-Spirited" because it feels like cultural appropriation FOR ME.) |
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Hybrid Mode
