Transgendered Furry Slave

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by Heart

Why the focus on whether this 12-year-old kid is gay or straight? What does that have to do with anything? This seems to be more a question of children, parents, and kinks.

Personally, I see a HUGE difference between being a kinky parent and being a queer parent. Queer parents can be as private as straight parents about their sexual/intimate lives. (It's really homophobes that over-focus on what queers do in bed, and sexualize queers all the time.)
Parents with kinks may be queer OR straight, (this particular couple sounds straight-identified), so the question really seems to be one of whether or not and how much to expose children to their parents sexual/erotic kinks.

I think of kink as erotic power-exchange, and that is not something I would choose to share with my child. Others may feel differently, but in my opinion this father is forcing his child to be a voyeur, and that violates boundaries of consent.

Yes, this exactly what is going on. And in this context is is abuse.
And the kid is uncomfortable, period. He needs an adult that understands the importance of boundaries to report the abuse.

This doesn't have a thing to do with what we all may or may not enjoy sexually- it is about forcing and underage person to do something against their will. It is abuse if done to an adult as well. Has nothing to do with making any value judgement on what adults might want to engage in as adults with consent.

[kannon]

Originally Posted by AtLastHome

Yes, this exactly what is going on. And in this context is is abuse.
And the kid is uncomfortable, period. He needs an adult that understands the importance of boundaries to report the abuse.

This doesn't have a thing to do with what we all may or may not enjoy sexually- it is about forcing and underage person to do something against their will. It is abuse if done to an adult as well. Has nothing to do with making any value judgement on what adults might want to engage in as adults with consent.

How are the dad and his girlfriend forcing the kid to do something against his will? Other than embarrassing him by going out in public while the girlfriend wears a tail and collar. I wouldn't consider that sexual abuse. Did I miss something?

[Dominique]

I'm going to have to start at the beginning...are we talking about the furries?

Every year they have their convention here in Pittsburgh. It was just two week ends ago.

It's no differeent than the Trekkies (people who dress and act in character
of the star trek people)

OK, off to read before I coment

[Heart]

Originally Posted by AtLastHome

Yes, this exactly what is going on. And in this context is is abuse.
And the kid is uncomfortable, period. He needs an adult that understands the importance of boundaries to report the abuse.

This doesn't have a thing to do with what we all may or may not enjoy sexually- it is about forcing and underage person to do something against their will. It is abuse if done to an adult as well. Has nothing to do with making any value judgement on what adults might want to engage in as adults with consent.

I did not call it abuse. Abuse is imminent danger. Discomfort and embarrassment is not imminent danger. Plus, calling child welfare authorities often exposes families to racist, sexist, classist, homophopbic systems that compound trauma, have no understanding of diversity in families, and do not have children's best interests at heart, but are mostly concerned with liability. I'm not personally comfortable with this parent's decisions and feel it violates boundaries, but that does not mean I am labeling it abusive.

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by Heart

I did not call it abuse. Abuse is imminent danger. Discomfort and embarrassment is not imminent danger. Plus, calling child welfare authorities often exposes families to racist, sexist, classist, homophopbic systems that compound trauma, have no understanding of diversity in families, and do not have children's best interests at heart, but are mostly concerned with liability. I'm not personally comfortable with this parent's decisions and feel it violates boundaries, but that does not mean I am labeling it abusive.

OK, I can see this- and I do know about social services and how these systems are as you state at times. No, it isn't imminent danger- but it crosses boundaries and I would be very concerned with this kid's discomfort.- especially if this is the transgender furry phenomenon that includes butt plugs. Given the possible kinds of exposure he could be subjected to (not saying he is right now), it could turn into legally defined child abuse.

This just isn't a matter of how kids can get all goofy about their parents being sexual beings. And the kid will have plenty of time to discover and explore all dimensions (including various sex toys) of sexuality as he grows up.

To be honest, I would want to know about this as a parent and talk with my ex about it. Even when we are separated or divorced and share custody, it is really important to share child rearing practices in a consistant manner- for the kid. I honestly don't give a hooray for his father's desires here. Adults have the space to do what we want and not involve our kids. Especially at ages that are just difficult with development in ordinary circumstances.