How to tell if she's into you... - Page 4

Bella~Vita · 03-02-2011, 02:08 PM

When actions speak louder than words

AtLast · 03-02-2011, 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by key

I can be so clueless sometimes. And I miss opportunities. This frustrates me.

Today's example:

Coming home from work, tired, a bit disheveled. Just thinking about dinner and a hot bath. As I am getting my two dogs out of the truck, I see a veeeery cuuuute woman unloading a u-haul truck. I am so ...? I honestly don't know (shy, clueless, ?) I barely even look her way. She stops what she is doing and smiles at me. I smile and say hi, then realize I forgot something in the truck, go back and get it. As I head towards home again she is still standing there smiling. I say hi again (dork?) as we walk past her.

It does not dawn on me until I am in the bath that she had stopped what she was doing and was smiling at me. Who knows, maybe she was just tired and taking a break. Maybe she liked my dogs. Maybe her face is stuck in a smile naturally. But maybe, just maybe she was open to me saying something more than hi. Maybe something like welcome to the neighborhood? Maybe I will get another chance if I can even remember what she looked like. UGH!

This is just today's example. I feel like my cluelessness makes me completely oblivious to these types of situations/opportunities in the moment. It is only after the fact that I sometimes get it.

Can anyone relate?

Oh, yes..... I can relate! yes.... "after-the-fact" is my middle name!

proximitywithoutintimacy · 03-04-2011, 05:17 PM

I'm so naive... relationships are my forte; dating, however, is not

proximitywithoutintimacy · 03-11-2011, 10:20 AM

If one of her closest friends says she'll hook you up with her... good sign?

undone · 03-12-2011, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atomiczombie

I totally do this too!!!

Or, I tend to assume that the only reason a girl is interested in me, when she does make it obvious, is for carnal reasons (this has happened to me in the past and my heart was broke a little bit). I just don't know how to tell if a girl is interested in me for sex or for more, for who I am and not just what I can do for her in the bedroom (or the car, living room, kitchen, shower, etc. :P). It makes me honestly distrustful.

treat her the way you feel about it... If you want just sex then be honest about it, but your tone implies that you are looking for something a bit more, so treat her like it, she will either reciprocate or not. It also never hurts to talk or ask about it, keeps the air clear so you can see what's coming and maneuver accordingly.

I have always appreciated when some else can express what there interest is. It doesn't mean anything more than this is how i fell and what i am looking for at this moment

smouldering · 03-15-2011, 06:30 AM

Yup it can be hard..

I have the same issue as AtomicZombie lol.. I can't always tell if someone is just looking for something casual or something more long term... if they are being genuine or saying whatever they think will get them in my pants lol..

Ive also had the issue of Butches thinking I am into them because I am nice or they assume because I am being sweet I want in their pants... -- Dating can be confusing!

But I agree about paying attention to body language sometimes how we act or react speaks louder then what we say

Sweet_Amor_Taino · 03-15-2011, 07:31 AM

The morning phone call.. the sound of her voice.. giggles and laughter.

JustJo · 03-15-2011, 09:08 AM

Ummmm.....no clue.

I'm one of those dense people when it comes to flirting. Years ago, in a group of friend/acquaintances I jokingly said "how come you all flirt with each other and no one flirts with me?"

There was general laughter and then one was kind enough to inform me "uh, Jo...we do...you just don't get it."

True story.

proximitywithoutintimacy · 03-19-2011, 04:57 PM

One girl told me it made her feel "a little jealous" when I told her about this beautiful love letter I had from an ex-girlfriend who I adore. I think she might be into me...

proximitywithoutintimacy · 03-24-2011, 01:25 PM

If she hugs you, kisses your cheek and says "text me tomorrow" but then texts you an hour later telling you how cute you are... she might be into you

bigbutchmistie · 03-24-2011, 01:37 PM

I'm on my I phone typing this but for me I can feel it and someone's lack of actions will.tell me every time

If you tell me you are gonna so something and you don't etc

Lots of the things show when someone is just not into you

Personally I think I'm a Damn good catch and someone is crazy not.to.be into.me.lol

LeftWriteFemme · 03-24-2011, 02:19 PM

If you give her bottom a little spank and she starts following you around, she is into you; if she calls the cops she's not.......

Rockinonahigh · 03-24-2011, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

Ummmm.....no clue.

I'm one of those dense people when it comes to flirting. Years ago, in a group of friend/acquaintances I jokingly said "how come you all flirt with each other and no one flirts with me?"

There was general laughter and then one was kind enough to inform me "uh, Jo...we do...you just don't get it."

True story.

Join the club,for years I had and still have a dense qulity.Sometimes it just goes over my head..

Chancie · 03-24-2011, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smouldering

Yup it can be hard..

I have the same issue as AtomicZombie lol.. I can't always tell if someone is just looking for something casual or something more long term... if they are being genuine or saying whatever they think will get them in my pants lol..

Ive also had the issue of Butches thinking I am into them because I am nice or they assume because I am being sweet I want in their pants... -- Dating can be confusing!

But I agree about paying attention to body language sometimes how we act or react speaks louder then what we say

I hope it's okay if I ask you a question.

Your profile says, 'as long as you pull my hair you can call me anything .'

Doesn't that sound like you want something casual?

I think casual can be fun and fabulous and

I think that if you want your hair pulled,

You should get your hair pulled, so

I am not being judge-y.

AtLast · 03-24-2011, 04:40 PM

Ummm.... so......

Why not just say "I'm into you?"

I know, I'm no fun.....

miss entycing · 03-24-2011, 04:59 PM

if they are still calling you after they've moved on....
they may be into you.
*shrugs*

proximitywithoutintimacy · 03-24-2011, 06:32 PM

I'm still painfully naive about whether or not she likes me... ha... ha...

Quintease · 04-07-2011, 09:26 AM

I like attention, so I can always tell if someone likes me. It works the other way too, I can always see if someone likes my partner, which can be hard.

I'm not always good. Once I spent a whole night with two old friends and completely missed the fact that they were now together. My gf at the time, who was usually rubbish at this sort of thing, was the one to point it out!

It's the way someone looks at you, this searching - looking for deeper meaning kind of look. Their body language changes, they move closer, become more attentive. They listen and remember things you say. Plus they contact you quite randomly. It can always go the other way as well, they can be very distant, even give you dirty looks when you are both out, but then you they always know where you are..

apretty · 04-07-2011, 09:50 AM

i assume everyone wants me--i'm a libra.

flower77 · 07-25-2011, 03:34 PM

Um.. if I was into you I'd probably go dumb.. you know.. cos all the blood leaves my brain! That is why it's good to meet someone who genuinely makes you laugh.. giggling is a clue (and she's not laughing at you, unless you are making a joke about yourself and you meant her too!) I listen alot. I smile. Take deep breaths. Make eyes. I can't beleive you don't know these things ;-) you cheeky ones ;-)

Sometimes I think I confuse women 'cos if they reached out to touch my arm then I'd be all nervous but that's not the same as making a cold face and stepping backward, which would be "not into you". Reading between the lines it's a compliment I'm all tense! If you know what I'm saying! Sexual tension!

So be careful to know the difference between excited/nervous and not interested/hostile. How she shows her interest in you isn't always blatantly obvious.. so.. There are some videos on YouTube I've recently watched, although straight, kind of give you some solid clues. Named something like How to tell if a girl/boy is into you.

I hope that helps.
F xx

03-02-2011, 02:08 PM	#61
Bella~Vita Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: where salt is used for Margaritas not Snow Posts: 891 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,049 Thanked 1,322 Times in 443 Posts Rep Power: 7157596	When actions speak louder than words __________________ ~ I believe that pleasing everyone is impossible..... but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake ~

03-15-2011, 06:30 AM	#66
smouldering Member How Do You Identify?: Punky girly girl, glittery femme Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, etc. Relationship Status: Single, Recovering Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Ohio Posts: 1,288 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,306 Thanked 3,974 Times in 924 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Yup it can be hard.. I have the same issue as AtomicZombie lol.. I can't always tell if someone is just looking for something casual or something more long term... if they are being genuine or saying whatever they think will get them in my pants lol.. Ive also had the issue of Butches thinking I am into them because I am nice or they assume because I am being sweet I want in their pants... -- Dating can be confusing! But I agree about paying attention to body language sometimes how we act or react speaks louder then what we say __________________ ~~Smouldering~~ Suit the action to the word, the word to the action. ~William Shakespeare

03-15-2011, 07:31 AM	#67
Sweet_Amor_Taino Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Gentleman Preferred Pronoun?: he/him Relationship Status: Exclusively dating, Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Austin Tx Posts: 538 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 388 Thanked 853 Times in 298 Posts Rep Power: 4397590	The morning phone call.. the sound of her voice.. giggles and laughter. __________________ When we are aware that each moment of each day and each step we take,is truly mystical and full of wonder,we will live our lives with greater thought and care, we will also respect and appreciate This moment.

03-15-2011, 09:08 AM	#68
JustJo Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: pushy broad Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Follow your heart; it knows things your mind cannot explain. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Southeast corner Posts: 5,633 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 24,417 Thanked 25,404 Times in 4,660 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Ummmm.....no clue. I'm one of those dense people when it comes to flirting. Years ago, in a group of friend/acquaintances I jokingly said "how come you all flirt with each other and no one flirts with me?" There was general laughter and then one was kind enough to inform me "uh, Jo...we do...you just don't get it." True story. __________________ I'm not tall enough to ride emotional roller coasters

03-24-2011, 02:19 PM	#72
LeftWriteFemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Daddy's good girl Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Jersey Posts: 16,642 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,529 Thanked 12,285 Times in 5,184 Posts Rep Power: 21474868	If you give her bottom a little spank and she starts following you around, she is into you; if she calls the cops she's not....... __________________ Clicking on these dragon eggs will take you to my new erotic novella: Dragon Bait .........Hope you enjoy it! ________________________________________________ Please take a look at my work Click on flashing smilie to see my website To look at my Daddy/girl erotica book Click on pompom girl to see Elbows on the Table, Palms Flat

03-04-2011, 05:17 PM	#63
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	I'm so naive... relationships are my forte; dating, however, is not

03-11-2011, 10:20 AM	#64
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	If one of her closest friends says she'll hook you up with her... good sign?

03-19-2011, 04:57 PM	#69
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	One girl told me it made her feel "a little jealous" when I told her about this beautiful love letter I had from an ex-girlfriend who I adore. I think she might be into me...

03-24-2011, 01:25 PM	#70
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	If she hugs you, kisses your cheek and says "text me tomorrow" but then texts you an hour later telling you how cute you are... she might be into you

03-24-2011, 01:37 PM	#71
bigbutchmistie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Since You Need A Label. Butch Relationship Status: Still Dreaming Of My Happily Ever After Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Arlington Texas Posts: 4,009 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,950 Thanked 5,364 Times in 1,941 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	I'm on my I phone typing this but for me I can feel it and someone's lack of actions will.tell me every time If you tell me you are gonna so something and you don't etc Lots of the things show when someone is just not into you Personally I think I'm a Damn good catch and someone is crazy not.to.be into.me.lol

03-24-2011, 04:40 PM	#75
AtLast Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Woman Preferred Pronoun?: HER - SHE Relationship Status: Relating Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: CA & AZ I'm a Snowbird Posts: 5,408 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,826 Thanked 10,827 Times in 3,199 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Ummm.... so...... Why not just say "I'm into you?" I know, I'm no fun.....

03-24-2011, 04:59 PM	#76
miss entycing Senior Member How Do You Identify?: dangerous, but worth the risk. Preferred Pronoun?: just be nice.. it's that easy. Relationship Status: CapitalM's carved upon my skin. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: on the southern edge of sanity, under a carolina moon. Posts: 3,276 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,341 Thanked 8,262 Times in 2,254 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	if they are still calling you after they've moved on.... they may be into you. shrugs __________________ True strength lies in submission which permits one to dedicate their life, through devotion, to something beyond themselves. Whenever someone awakens fully, it affects human consciousness at a collective level. It is like dropping a stone into a dark murky pond. Ripples of light... Not one word need be spoken.

03-24-2011, 06:32 PM	#77
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	I'm still painfully naive about whether or not she likes me... ha... ha...

04-07-2011, 09:26 AM	#78
Quintease Member How Do You Identify?: Rainbow femme Preferred Pronoun?: princess Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 514 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 508 Thanked 1,817 Times in 417 Posts Rep Power: 10560327	I like attention, so I can always tell if someone likes me. It works the other way too, I can always see if someone likes my partner, which can be hard. I'm not always good. Once I spent a whole night with two old friends and completely missed the fact that they were now together. My gf at the time, who was usually rubbish at this sort of thing, was the one to point it out! It's the way someone looks at you, this searching - looking for deeper meaning kind of look. Their body language changes, they move closer, become more attentive. They listen and remember things you say. Plus they contact you quite randomly. It can always go the other way as well, they can be very distant, even give you dirty looks when you are both out, but then you they always know where you are.. __________________ It is not worth an intelligent person's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.

04-07-2011, 09:50 AM	#79
apretty Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: sea shell Relationship Status: married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: san diego Posts: 1,687 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,927 Thanked 4,373 Times in 1,012 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	i assume everyone wants me--i'm a libra.

07-25-2011, 03:34 PM	#80
flower77 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Ms Relationship Status: Single pringle Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: UK (South) Posts: 11 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17 Thanked 27 Times in 9 Posts Rep Power: 238401	Um.. if I was into you I'd probably go dumb.. you know.. cos all the blood leaves my brain! That is why it's good to meet someone who genuinely makes you laugh.. giggling is a clue (and she's not laughing at you, unless you are making a joke about yourself and you meant her too!) I listen alot. I smile. Take deep breaths. Make eyes. I can't beleive you don't know these things ;-) you cheeky ones ;-) Sometimes I think I confuse women 'cos if they reached out to touch my arm then I'd be all nervous but that's not the same as making a cold face and stepping backward, which would be "not into you". Reading between the lines it's a compliment I'm all tense! If you know what I'm saying! Sexual tension! So be careful to know the difference between excited/nervous and not interested/hostile. How she shows her interest in you isn't always blatantly obvious.. so.. There are some videos on YouTube I've recently watched, although straight, kind of give you some solid clues. Named something like How to tell if a girl/boy is into you. I hope that helps. F xx