Femmes: How do you like to be treated on a date?

blush · 07-28-2011, 11:08 PM

I've always considered a date to be a "social gift.". We obviously think enough of each other to spend time together. Since it is a compliment to be asked out, I don't impose strict expectations. If we don't mesh, we don't mesh. But impossible expectations can strangle a date.

Starbuck · 09-04-2011, 08:17 PM

[COLOR="Indigo"] Since I am in a relationship, I will approach this question from that angle. When we go out, I want her eyes on me, not on the televisions or on her phone, which I would prefer to be on vibrate (since she has kids, they can still reach her). I appreciate the door being opened for me and simple gestures of affection like touching my hand as she smiles. It took me by surprise the first few times she ordered for me but now I kind of expect it. I'll just tell her what I want and she tells the waiter what I want; I like it./COLOR]

ruffryder · 10-02-2012, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Anya*

Just treat me the same way you want to be treated!

First dates for me are always a meeting at a coffee house for coffee-dutch, of course. When we make arrangements, I always suggest either morning or afternoon. Never a fancy dinner at a restaurant. I like to keep it low-key with minimal expectations for either of us.

If I don't feel a connection for any reason, it is easy to keep the date short and sweet and be on my way.

If there is any sort of connection, we will know it and can take it from there to arrange other dates.

This is how my honey and I started our dates

One date was also watching football at a sports bar/restaurant with her wearing one of my shirts and sharing food. She had a blast!

A lot of our dates were coffee , lunch, dinner dates and we just laughed and laughed and laughed and then we fell in love.

Femminator · 10-02-2012, 05:56 PM

Personally I don't want to know about your exs unless I ask. This will not happen for me until several dates. For general dates:

Show up early, not more than 15-20 mins however,(unless you want to wait while I primp) do not show up late. Am I so unimportant that you can't get there on time? If you have to be late, for an emergency that came up, caught in traffic etc, call me. As soon as you realize you will be late, even if it is 4 hours earlier, I need to know so I am not sitting around in my outfit and getting it mussed and wrinkled.

Show up nicely dressed, not in a football jersey and holey jeans. Really, I am taking time to get pretty for you, can't you get handsome for me?

Do not assume that spending money will equal a good date. It has nothing to do with money. Everything to do with how you treat me, how you make me feel and if you listen.

I am a lady. Please treat me like one. Drop me off at the door, and then go park if it is nasty or you have to park a long ways off. Hold my door and escort me in if we are going to a party or a resturant, allow me to sit while you stand if there is no place to sit.

Make me feel special, and cherished. I don't care if I have dated you one time, or am married to you(which my wife does treat me as above). Treat me like you know I am precious to you and you will be greatly rewarded.

Ginger · 10-02-2012, 06:21 PM

Be kind. Recognize me.

imperfect_cupcake · 10-03-2012, 01:06 AM

Quote:

Treat me like you know I am precious to you and you will be greatly rewarded.

oh absolutely. As the friendship develops and we start to value each other, by being shown I am very valued in way important to that person - and in ways I can understand and recognise (I like to feel safe, above all things).

If we are talking about what impresses us in the way they go about showing us they are interested, rather than dating?

from my blog:

Quote:

But I like my women with intelligence, a back bone, the ability to stand up to me, disagree with me, teach me new things about people, challenge my beliefs, stimulate me to grow... and of course adore me. I'm a complete sucker for being chased in a feisty, fun way. Not a wet whiney way. Don't keep showing up at my door with flowers with drippy eyeballs. Be a playful, pisstaking, persistant gentleman-woman. Maybe ask me to treat your back. Insist on carrying my things. Don't take no for an answer to take me to dinner, be able to playfully tell me to shut up. I like that. I'll tell you to shut up too, and you'd best find that type of banter fun.

Self depricating humour, crusty, gritty banter, give a good playful insult and able to take a good comeback.

I think because we are all so very different it's going to be hard to find any kind of one style fits. Respect is not a universal understanding. it's very relative.

It's interesting reading, that for sure.

Zimmeh · 02-17-2013, 10:40 PM

Heheh..I had that shirt for a few months

I enjoyed all of our dates, including us going to Disney's Magic Kingdom for the first time!

You are a sweet person and I'm glad we fell in love!

Zimmeh

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruffryder

This is how my honey and I started our dates

One date was also watching football at a sports bar/restaurant with her wearing one of my shirts and sharing food. She had a blast!

A lot of our dates were coffee , lunch, dinner dates and we just laughed and laughed and laughed and then we fell in love.

CherryBlonde · 04-18-2013, 11:15 AM

I don't think it's about how much money you spend. Be creative, something fun and different will definitely get my attention. Sweet, chivalrous and funny is always a way to win my heart.

Happyfemme · 04-29-2013, 02:18 PM

I think it's important to be kind and respectful on a date. I like manners and nice conversation. I like it when the person opens doors and offers me their arm to hold onto or asks if they can hold my hand. How I feel when I am with the person is most important. I like to feel safe, comfortable and cared for.

07-28-2011, 11:08 PM	#1
blush Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: I'm with goofy. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 911 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 962 Thanked 2,375 Times in 616 Posts Rep Power: 15632317	I've always considered a date to be a "social gift.". We obviously think enough of each other to spend time together. Since it is a compliment to be asked out, I don't impose strict expectations. If we don't mesh, we don't mesh. But impossible expectations can strangle a date. __________________ "We never forget those who make us blush." Jean-Francois de la Harpe

09-04-2011, 08:17 PM	#2
Starbuck Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Soft Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Oklahoma City Posts: 2,436 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,378 Thanked 2,148 Times in 756 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	[COLOR="Indigo"] Since I am in a relationship, I will approach this question from that angle. When we go out, I want her eyes on me, not on the televisions or on her phone, which I would prefer to be on vibrate (since she has kids, they can still reach her). I appreciate the door being opened for me and simple gestures of affection like touching my hand as she smiles. It took me by surprise the first few times she ordered for me but now I kind of expect it. I'll just tell her what I want and she tells the waiter what I want; I like it./COLOR] __________________ To forgive is to set the prisoner free, And then discover the prisoner was you.

10-02-2012, 05:56 PM	#4
Femminator Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Femme Preferred Pronoun?: feminine pronouns Relationship Status: Married, but not legally in my state! Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: Michigan Posts: 99 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 288 Thanked 444 Times in 91 Posts Rep Power: 2084268	Personally I don't want to know about your exs unless I ask. This will not happen for me until several dates. For general dates: Show up early, not more than 15-20 mins however,(unless you want to wait while I primp) do not show up late. Am I so unimportant that you can't get there on time? If you have to be late, for an emergency that came up, caught in traffic etc, call me. As soon as you realize you will be late, even if it is 4 hours earlier, I need to know so I am not sitting around in my outfit and getting it mussed and wrinkled. Show up nicely dressed, not in a football jersey and holey jeans. Really, I am taking time to get pretty for you, can't you get handsome for me? Do not assume that spending money will equal a good date. It has nothing to do with money. Everything to do with how you treat me, how you make me feel and if you listen. I am a lady. Please treat me like one. Drop me off at the door, and then go park if it is nasty or you have to park a long ways off. Hold my door and escort me in if we are going to a party or a resturant, allow me to sit while you stand if there is no place to sit. Make me feel special, and cherished. I don't care if I have dated you one time, or am married to you(which my wife does treat me as above). Treat me like you know I am precious to you and you will be greatly rewarded. __________________ Be the change you wish to see in the world - Ghandi

10-02-2012, 06:21 PM	#5
Ginger Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme lesbian Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: East coast Posts: 2,416 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,829 Thanked 12,295 Times in 2,057 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Be kind. Recognize me.

04-18-2013, 11:15 AM	#8
CherryBlonde Junior Member How Do You Identify?: high femme babygirl Preferred Pronoun?: she...her...Ms. Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Arizona Posts: 51 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 115 Thanked 209 Times in 42 Posts Rep Power: 3181299	I don't think it's about how much money you spend. Be creative, something fun and different will definitely get my attention. Sweet, chivalrous and funny is always a way to win my heart.

04-29-2013, 02:18 PM	#9
Happyfemme Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Engaged Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: United States Posts: 1,666 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 15,303 Thanked 4,940 Times in 1,495 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	I think it's important to be kind and respectful on a date. I like manners and nice conversation. I like it when the person opens doors and offers me their arm to hold onto or asks if they can hold my hand. How I feel when I am with the person is most important. I like to feel safe, comfortable and cared for.