The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over.

luv2luvgirls · 07-31-2011, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruthie14

Happy Sunday Lofters.. Wow it has really been slow around here!

I am curious... it seems in my circle of friends who are over 40 and single are only into friends with benefits or one night stands. Niether of which is ok for me... alright for them if that is what they want, just not ok for me.

I am wondering how many folks here feel the same way they do. You don't have to be single to answer the question, just answer as if you are single if you are not.

It just seems there are too few people that want the long term thing anymore. I am 49, I have had a few gfs but I have only been our for 5 years...some of which I was still married to a man and was not looking for a relationship with a woman at that time. It seems to me that only women who are under 40 even think about having a real relationship around here. If they are over 40 and believe that relationships are great... they are already in one.

well for me i dont want a casual hook up i want something we can grow in and last.... hope that helps

clay · 07-31-2011, 02:40 PM

Hi Ruthie: I am "over 40" and I want neither a FWB NOR a one night stand. I AM interested in the LTR! Many years ago..when I was a young pup..yes, I did a couple myself. But for the most part, my relationships have been LTR, committed, and monogamous! Now I want another LTR with someone...whom we will live out the rest of our lives with one another...in monogamy! I want that long haul...no matter what.,...we WILL see one another thru better or worse, richer or poorer! Ruthie, you know my story...and I WANT to have a love of my life again. I WANT my soulmate. I believe in fate, destiny, and love happily ever after! I am well on my way to having found that again...I am truly blessed....yea, cupid shot me in the ass....dang that arrow hurts....so good!!! <wink> Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that I am over 40 and I DO absolutely believe in LTR's...even at this age...smiling broadly here! Know I wish you the very best, my friend!!! Good luck...hugs...Clay

jelli · 07-31-2011, 02:53 PM

I will be back on the 14th when I am "officially" able to post here.

Invictus · 07-31-2011, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jelli

I will be back on the 14th when I am "officially" able to post here.

Please feel free to post now if you like, I doubt anyone here would be unwilling to "spot" you a few weeks

ruthie14 · 07-31-2011, 07:45 PM

Anya, luv and (((clay))) thanks for your answers! It gets very discouraging here. I am not kidding when I tell you that I have given up. I am very tired of defending myself... tired of women looking at me like I'm from some antiquated age... tired of a lot of it, frankly.. I love butch/femme and I believe in ever after love.... if that makes me antiquated then so be it! The women here make me feel like it's just me that feels that way. It's making me a little crazy. I wanted to know if it was just this large circle of lesbians around here or a more global issue... not sure if we are a true representative of the world.... but I wanted to know... ask around, if you will.... I am very curious about this issue.

Thanks, Ruthie

clay · 07-31-2011, 09:08 PM

((((((((Ruthie)))))))))....know I loves ya!!! Take care....Clay

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruthie14

Anya, luv and (((clay))) thanks for your answers! It gets very discouraging here. I am not kidding when I tell you that I have given up. I am very tired of defending myself... tired of women looking at me like I'm from some antiquated age... tired of a lot of it, frankly.. I love butch/femme and I believe in ever after love.... if that makes me antiquated then so be it! The women here make me feel like it's just me that feels that way. It's making me a little crazy. I wanted to know if it was just this large circle of lesbians around here or a more global issue... not sure if we are a true representative of the world.... but I wanted to know... ask around, if you will.... I am very curious about this issue.

Thanks, Ruthie

07-31-2011, 02:40 PM	#2
clay Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches Posts: 13,136 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 97,020 Thanked 31,667 Times in 7,748 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	Hi Ruthie: I am "over 40" and I want neither a FWB NOR a one night stand. I AM interested in the LTR! Many years ago..when I was a young pup..yes, I did a couple myself. But for the most part, my relationships have been LTR, committed, and monogamous! Now I want another LTR with someone...whom we will live out the rest of our lives with one another...in monogamy! I want that long haul...no matter what.,...we WILL see one another thru better or worse, richer or poorer! Ruthie, you know my story...and I WANT to have a love of my life again. I WANT my soulmate. I believe in fate, destiny, and love happily ever after! I am well on my way to having found that again...I am truly blessed....yea, cupid shot me in the ass....dang that arrow hurts....so good!!! <wink> Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that I am over 40 and I DO absolutely believe in LTR's...even at this age...smiling broadly here! Know I wish you the very best, my friend!!! Good luck...hugs...Clay __________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault

07-31-2011, 02:53 PM	#3
jelli Member How Do You Identify?: Femmilicious Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: And you said I wasn’t your type!!! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: SC Posts: 836 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,758 Thanked 1,079 Times in 377 Posts Rep Power: 16588549	I will be back on the 14th when I am "officially" able to post here. __________________ “Sometimes we make the right decision; sometimes we make the decision right.” “Every conflict is a lesson in self-discovery for both of us. Sometimes it's only hindsight that makes it worth it. For you, I would do it all again.“

07-31-2011, 07:45 PM	#5
ruthie14 Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: NJ Posts: 844 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,904 Thanked 1,245 Times in 461 Posts Rep Power: 5946335	Anya, luv and (((clay))) thanks for your answers! It gets very discouraging here. I am not kidding when I tell you that I have given up. I am very tired of defending myself... tired of women looking at me like I'm from some antiquated age... tired of a lot of it, frankly.. I love butch/femme and I believe in ever after love.... if that makes me antiquated then so be it! The women here make me feel like it's just me that feels that way. It's making me a little crazy. I wanted to know if it was just this large circle of lesbians around here or a more global issue... not sure if we are a true representative of the world.... but I wanted to know... ask around, if you will.... I am very curious about this issue. Thanks, Ruthie