VANILLA THREAD Who can initiate sex in your relationship? VANILLA THREAD

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by *Anya*

Communication in a relationship of any type is critical. How can I initiate a sexual encounter if I can't talk about the little, mundane things of life, as well as all of those big things that may come up?

I thrive in a relationship where communication is open, honest, a two-way street, safe, trusting and I am encouraged to express my needs-including sexual needs.

When all of those pieces are in place: yes, I enjoy the freedom to be able to initiate sex.

I am femme

You've said it beautifully!

[msW8ing]

I agree with Anya communicate is extremely essential in any relationship...and I prefer one when both initiate...I adore the look on Hys/Her face that little gleam in their eye when they know you want them..give me that same sexy/desired/wanted tingle when I see them making the advances that they need me NOW..lol...and if you and your lover know one another well enough, sometimes all it takes is a glance and a smirk and you both know. I remember one time with an ex..I was vaccuming..and all of sudden it stopped..I turned to look at the socket to see if it was still plugged in and there Hy stood..nekky..with the cord in Hys hand twirling it with that look in Hys eyes and that smirk lmao.

[Honey]

Its not who INITIATES the sex...its who suggests we break for air, food, and H2O...! Usually Hym....., but one has to refuel I guess .....I'll be over here patiently awaiting round #....

[WolfyOne]

Sometimes life gets busy
Sometimes you have to hit me with a 2x4
Sometimes I can't read minds
Sometimes a look is all it takes

Oh and in answer to the OP, either or is fine with me
Like a few other posters, communication is key

[clay]

Originally Posted by Honey

Its not who INITIATES the sex...its who suggests we break for air, food, and H2O...! Usually Hym....., but one has to refuel I guess .....I'll be over here patiently awaiting round #....

what she said...lol

[Thamca74]

This is an interesting topic. I am a femme and have been with women for over 12 years and never thought about this. I love to initiate. And --- I never really thought about it, but I have often refused sex and never realized that it might be hurting my partners feelings. Maybe that is part of why I no longer have a partner. eh.
good thing to think about!!

[LipstickLola]

My first r/s was all about great communication and so we both freely initiated.
I'm sad, (embarrassed too) to say that I'm recently out of a r/s where I was always shut down, it really is tough on your self-esteem

I shoulda known the first time she wiped my lipstick off her mouth that I was in the wrong r/s, live and learn, eh?

Oh, did I say I have a healthy sex drive and am totally open to either person and unless i had a fever of umm 106, id never turn you down, LOL

[funkyfemme]

I'm femme and I am for either one initiating. It feels good to know that you're desired and wanted and I like making my butch (when I have one) feel this way too. And yeah, like a few other femmes posting here, I'm highly sexed and very rarely turn down a chance for some hot, steamy, headboard grabbin, leaving nail tracks on hys back kinda lovin' when in a relationship.

hmm...that last tidbit was prolly a lil TMI, no?

[iamkeri1]

Originally Posted by LipstickLola

My first r/s was all about great communication and so we both freely initiated.
I'm sad, (embarrassed too) to say that I'm recently out of a r/s where I was always shut down, it really is tough on your self-esteem

I shoulda known the first time she wiped my lipstick off her mouth that I was in the wrong r/s, live and learn, eh?

Oh, did I say I have a healthy sex drive and am totally open to either person and unless i had a fever of umm 106, id never turn you down, LOL

Excuse me ... ahem! I would like to ask a question. I hate to admit I don't know what it means, but, oh well, I don't know what it is. What does r/s mean?
Smooches,
Keri