Street Harrassment

[mariamma]

WomenMoveMe, what a horrible and powerful story. Butch women get the brunt of the abuse for not being 'feminine' and effeminate men for not being masculine. It's horrid and ugly.

[mariamma]

I used to make out with my GF in her car. I was 18, she was 26, I was attending Humboldt State in Nor Cali. One hot and heavy night, I kept hearing someone shouting something. After a while I realized it was some jocky lil shit yelling "DYKE!" We ignored him. A few nights later, he threw a tennis ball at my GF's car. I looked up and saw that he had about 4 guys with him. They tried to hide in the shadows when I got out.
I reported the harassment, he got a reprimand. A while later, there was an incident with a stranger asleep in my dorm room. Apparently, he was drunk, walked onto the campus and yelled out "Who's the finest chick on campus!" His idea was to seduce the finest chick on campus. Someone...I wonder whom...told him I was and sent him to my room. Mind you, I was not known as the finest chick but as a lesbian who was friendly with the hippies and scorned the jocky lil shits. Everyone heard about that story. I pointed the lil shit out to all who would listen. He didn't come back the next semester though I don't know why.
That was the only lesbian related harassment. Many other issues. Usually they involve being followed by men in grocery stores and what not. I find looking them in the eye with my patented Mom-look-of-death-and-nut-shriveling and ask, "What do you want from me?" leaves them speechless and they go away. Except a few, they all usually lower their eyes and walk away.

[aishah]

i have not been harassed a lot for being queer, but i have been for being a woman. the street harassment was especially bad when i was in undergrad at florida state...i'm not sure why (i've never been thin or cute, and it absolutely had nothing to do with what i was wearing - i dressed very modestly even before i became muslim). it was practically a daily thing, probably exacerbated by the fact that i've always walked and taken the bus so i've been more exposed i guess. it really got to me. when i first converted to islam and began covering, it nearly stopped - the only difference in what i wore was that i covered my hair, which marked me as religious. i did get harassed by strangers and the police a few times for being muslim but it was much less often. since i stopped wearing hijab recently i've gotten catcalls a few times but nothing on the level of the daily sexual harassment i used to deal with (i live near the university of kansas now, so i wonder if it's a geographical thing).

[apretty]

Originally Posted by mariamma

Usually they involve being followed by Latin men in grocery stores and what not.

I thought that your statement was just about your racism but then I googled and did indeed see Latin men in grocery stores--Look at this one, near the mangos!




That smile surely means he's groped someone in canned goods!

[Jess]

Originally Posted by mariamma

I used to make out with my GF in her car. I was 18, she was 26, I was attending Humboldt State in Nor Cali. One hot and heavy night, I kept hearing someone shouting something. After a while I realized it was some jocky lil shit yelling "DYKE!" We ignored him. A few nights later, he threw a tennis ball at my GF's car. I looked up and saw that he had about 4 guys with him. They tried to hide in the shadows when I got out.
I reported the harassment, he got a reprimand. A while later, there was an incident with a stranger asleep in my dorm room. Apparently, he was drunk, walked onto the campus and yelled out "Who's the finest chick on campus!" His idea was to seduce the finest chick on campus. Someone...I wonder whom...told him I was and sent him to my room. Mind you, I was not known as the finest chick but as a lesbian who was friendly with the hippies and scorned the jocky lil shits. Everyone heard about that story. I pointed the lil shit out to all who would listen. He didn't come back the next semester though I don't know why.
That was the only lesbian related harassment. Many other issues. Usually they involve being followed by Latin men in grocery stores and what not. I find looking them in the eye with my patented Mom-look-of-death-and-nut-shriveling and ask, "What do you want from me?" leaves them speechless and they go away. Except a few, they all usually lower their eyes and walk away.

CRAIG!!!! You go girl! Big hugs... if I am ever out your way, you owe me a dance

[Parker]

I have been very lucky that I have been in very few physical altercations in my lifetime - I remember a straight guy hanging out in the local dyke dive bar in Fresno picked a fight with me on Halloween night sometime in the mid-90's.

It seemed odd to me that someone who hated dykes would be in a bar filled with them and then pick a fight with one, but he was drunk, got pissed, we had words, and then he grabbed me by the shirt and slammed me down on the pool table (this was when I was very thin - like 135lbs).

Before he could actually hit me, several of my friends started grabbing him, jumping on him, etc, so I just stood up, wrapped him up in a bear hug, picked him up, carried him out the door, and tossed his ass on the sidewalk outside. I was offered the job of bouncer that night. lol

But, like I said, I have been very lucky in that area. I know it and I am thankful for it - especially after reading and hearing some stories others have gone through.

So, I guess my worst incident of harassment came when I was living in Tulsa, OK back in the early 2000's. I played football with a women's contact team down there and we were at a local park holding practice when I heard a bunch of popping sounds. Since it was so close to the 4th of July, I assumed it was early fireworks until someone yelled, "hey - isnt that your car?!"

I looked over to the packed parking lot (I say that bc he chose my car out of dozens - bc mine was the one with gay stickers all over it) and saw a dude with a sledgehammer just fucking whaling on my little car. I mean, he beat the hell out of it - roof, hood, all the windows, etc.

When we all finally realized what was going on, we chased his ass and he took off in (what we later found out was) daddy's car - complete with Christian stickers on the back - while laughing and flipping us off.

One of my team mates was a cop so she immediately called it in and we had like 6-10 witnesses just from our team who saw him, his car, his plates, etc. But nothing ever came of it. The cops said they didnt have enough to pull him in for a line-up and he refused to have his picture taken for a photo line-up.

It all sounded like good ol' boy bullshit to me, but what're you gonna do, right?

The local gay rag did an article on it and took a pic of me with my car - it's posted below. It says Deborah Barnett because that's my birth name - I didnt change my name (legally or otherwise) until 2007, when I finally decided it was "ok" to change my name just because I wanted a name other than the one my parents gave me.





Oh god this pic .... this is the weight I would love to get back down to - I was about 200lbs or so here vs the 265lbs or so I am now.

[StoneOne]

I have no words ..........
I do however feel many things mostly Dark about what happened to U and I am trying to shake them as not to sink to the level of your attackers........ I am very Sorry this happened ......... My hopes are one day we arrive at the Higher Power makes no mistakes and she made you and I

[DeviantDaddy]

Originally Posted by mariamma

Many other issues. Usually they involve being followed by Latin men in grocery stores and what not. I find looking them in the eye with my patented Mom-look-of-death-and-nut-shriveling and ask, "What do you want from me?" leaves them speechless and they go away. Except a few, they all usually lower their eyes and walk away.

I am not sure how to take this. May I ask what exactly you meant by that statement?