Neurodiversity

[Outlaw]

Originally Posted by Kimbo

[COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=teal].....I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle. How did your diagnosis come about and by who, if I may ask?

I would encourage anyone who has medical/psychiatric/cognitive/neurological concerns to do some internet research on Lyme disease. Folks with Lyme are often misdiagnosed with a plethora of other diseases and syndromes that don't quite fit and therefore delay diagnosis and the onset of treatment. Lyme is often called the great imitator because upon initial consultation, it can present like MS, ALS, Depression/Anxiety/OCD, ADD, Fibro, Mono, Chronic Fatigue etc.

Keep an open mind, as most people with Lyme don't recall ever getting bit by a tic and as few as 35% report Lyme's "signature" bullseye rash. If the bull's-eye rash (erythema migrans) does appear, it can present years after getting bit and infected

Here are a few links to get you started: Lyme MD,
Canadian Lyme Fundation, and the NIH

There is a lot of information out there and it can be overwhelming, there is also a considerable amount of controversy around diagnosis and treatment. If I can be of any support in the process, or if you're interested in more information and inks I have found helpful, please PM me.

O

[Bit]

Hi Ruthie, welcome! Isn't taking that test amazing? I think that some people are highly sensitive, and some people are Aspies, and some people are both--there seems to be a lot of overlap, yanno?

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

PSS: Apocalipstic, you are a doll too! It is in our DNA that we all share here. You, me, Belle, and I believe Bit is one of us too.

I'm highly sensitive, Andrew, and I have Fibromyalgia, but I haven't been diagnosed with Asperger's. There are some criteria that I don't fit for the diagnosis.

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

really???

I am not the only over-appologizer?

Really... as a matter of fact, I had apologized in advance to Gryph--for EVERYTHING, no matter what I might say or do, lol---just a couple days before I read your post.

Originally Posted by violaine

i would like to touch on why people apologise so often, please- if anyone cares to explore deeper the topic? is it due to [or more/other than] feeling like words will come out all wrong in general [once a certain point in conversation has been reached]- or due to not wanting to take up so much time of another person, upsetting someone or even yourself further, past experiences, et c

For me, it's more an emotional control kind of thing... when I get overwhelmed and frazzled I don't always have the control to avoid being cranky. I had it well under control for a long time, but once I couldn't take anti-inflammatories anymore it came back, so I think being in physical pain must contribute a lot to it.

Also, taking on the puppy has made it worse; he's a very demanding and overwhelming creature, testosterone-laden teenager that he is now... hm... now that I think about that, I'm most likely to get overwhelmed after a day when he's been misbehaving, especially if he's pulled really hard on the leash and my shoulders are sore.

Sometimes I misinterpret what Gryph says, but sometimes I just get so overwhelmed that I can't keep from.. um... well, let's be polite and call it "cranky griping." When I feel myself getting overwhelmed and I know that's coming on, I apologize to him in advance (for everything, a blanket apology!) so that he'll know not to take ANYTHING personally.

Originally Posted by Kimbo

Apocalipstic I am very curious about how you came about being diagnosed later in life. I have been really struggling for quite some time now...........my Dr again keeps wanting to prescribe meds for some of the pausal symptoms I am having but every time I do something like this is makes my head worse. I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle..........

Kimbo, correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought you got diagnosed with Fibromyalgia a while back... do I remember that right?

The things you're describing are classic symptoms of Fibro brain fog; that sounds like a really bad Fibro flare (if that's what you have).

The classic treatment for brain fog is an SSRI like Prozac/Zoloft. It regulates your brain and the fog lifts. When I took Prozac for my Fibro, I started sleeping properly right away, my pain lessened, and my brain came back to normal for me--I felt like I was thinking sharply again for the first time in years--and my short term memory started working again.

If you don't have Fibro, I would urge you to see another doctor, a neurologist if you can.

Ooops, time for me to go offline, good night everyone!

[Andrew, Jr.]

For me, I have to focus on what task it is I am doing. If I get interrupted or side tracked by one of my furkids, I have to re-group. I cannot multi-task. No way no how.

Sometimes I say or use words that do not fit the dialogue going on. Then I get strange looks. Or I will be asked like what in the world is your problem? Are you a retard? What is your your problem? Sometimes they walk away from me, which I find very rude.

My bio-father always is insulting me. He just has no idea of how horrible his tongue is. For example, he belittles me for stuttering. Or if I have to repeat words in 3's he looks at me like I'm crazy. He just has no clue.

If I am in a social setting, and those who know of my disabilities, they tend to help me. I hang around them, and I try to listen for key words or jestures (face, hands). Online is so much harder.

Lyme Disease is something that we all should be checked for. I was many times. But I was also diagnosed when I was younger. Good thinking Outlaw.

[Kimbo]

Outlaw..Thanks for mentioning Lymes disease. It was a rheumatologist who diagnosed my Fibro. On initial visit she tested for lymes as well as a plethora of other possible things. I am neg for lymes.

Bit..yes I do have fibro, you are not mistaken. I've tried many of the drugs. I was diagnosed with fibro 12 years ago and as each of the meds were recommended I took them. I have had some ugly reactions to some of them..prozac about killed me. It is because of some of the reactions that I've had that I am very hesitant to try new drugs. Throughout the years my fibro has been for the most part controlled. I had one bad year where I had to take an extended leave from work due to fibro. I have bad days here and there but for the most part I feel that what is going on has gone beyond fibro fog.

[Apocalipstic]

Belle, Yes, I have been called stupid. Yeay. I am not stupid, just I communicate differently and sometimes oddly.

Kimbo, I hated Prozac too, Lexapro has worked best for me.

I can multitask, I have to at work. A lot. But it wears me out. I do get to pick my music and have dim lighting in the room and candles which really helps. Some days when I get home I am just empty. Cynthia has started putting the animals up for 30 minutes when I get home so I can just sit, because otherwise all 4 of them are all over me and I get all confused and overwhelmed even trying to put my work bag down.

Andrew, my father yelled at (and sometimes threatened) me for stuttering too. Now I have weird pauses in my speech during which people assume I have forgotten what I am saying, but really it is so I won't stutter.

[violaine]

dear jen,

i, too, get the pauses or locked verbally,, during communication with people - most awkward on the telephone with strangers [work related]. sometimes, the check out is not very amusing. probably due to feeling somewhat rushed. people are in line behind me while i'm fumbling- handling payment/transaction, & putting items back in purse, et c. if an employee comes over to say hallo, or talk to me, there's too much going on at once!

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by violaine

dear jen,

i, too, get the pauses or locked verbally,, during communication with people - most awkward on the telephone with strangers [work related]. sometimes, the check out is not very amusing. probably due to feeling somewhat rushed. people are in line behind me while i'm fumbling- handling payment/transaction, & putting items back in purse, et c. if an employee comes over to say hallo, or talk to me, there's too much going on at once!

I try to send Cynthia to the store when I can, but this weekend at Trader Joe's I did some slow breathing exercizes and was able to avoid getting too overwhelmed.

I make lists and try to be as organized as possible. If I have to fumble for my stuff I am a disaster. It is usually clear what state of mind I am in my how much of a mess my purse and work bag are.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Apocalipstic,

Oh yes. My father has a razor sharp tongue. Plus he was always good at being highly critical of me. And it was nothing for him to hold a knife at my throat and threaten me. Even when I see him today, in his 80's, he hasn't changed much at all. His tongue is still sharp. And he still calls me derrogatory names, and when I stutter, well, that just seems to add fuel to his belittlement of me.

Someone once asked me if I had chemo. I said no. I asked why they thought that. I was told that I stop talking totally when I start stuttering or saying the same word over repeatedly. It is known as "chemo brain".

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

Apocalipstic,

Oh yes. My father has a razor sharp tongue. Plus he was always good at being highly critical of me. And it was nothing for him to hold a knife at my throat and threaten me. Even when I see him today, in his 80's, he hasn't changed much at all. His tongue is still sharp. And he still calls me derrogatory names, and when I stutter, well, that just seems to add fuel to his belittlement of me.

Someone once asked me if I had chemo. I said no. I asked why they thought that. I was told that I stop talking totally when I start stuttering or saying the same word over repeatedly. It is known as "chemo brain".

As you know my Dad died last January, he was also very abusive. But in 1998 I wrote him a letter stating that I could only have anything to do with his as long as he treated me with respect. We never spoke again.

I still have his voice in my head, but it is getting better thanks to Bit and Gryph, medication, therapy and a lot of great friends listening to me and helping me.

Have you considered walking away? I think I would not be alive now if I had not just walked away.