Can a poly/mono work?

[boobookitty]

Originally Posted by QueenofSmirks

Boobookitty, with all due respect, this line in your previous post is what I'm sure most people got snagged on: "...or the 'special friend' of a married woman or[who] is or isn't out... ". Being the "special friend" of a married woman who isn't out would mean to most people that you are having a sexual relationship with a woman who isn't out, which would mean it's a secret, which to most people does not fall under the definition of "polyamory" (to love more than one person in an open and honest way) and would constitute "cheating" in such a relationship, however, if we really want to nitpick, the thread is not called "polyamory", it's just "poly" which means "more than one". So, I can see where things went astray. I think the implication behind the responses to your post is that by you being the "special friend' of someone who is married and not out, that implies that that person's spouse is being kept in the dark about your relationship. Maybe that isn't what you meant, but that's how it came across.

I do NOT agree, if there was a lack of clarity, the question of that should have been asked, ... instead a judgemnt of my behavior, by someone who what to look down her nose at me, was posted on an open forum.

I did not say her husband was in the dark!!!!

That was a made up accusation!!!

I wrote, "I like to build relationships, I do not like just screwing around."

I hang out and played pool with her husband, he was fully informed, BEFORE any sexual contact took place... IF a woman is single and does not want her co workers or her mother to know she is gay then she has that right... I respect the terms agreed to between each person I am involved with!

If her rules of relationship with someone else, is such that SHE may be with whom she pleases when she pleases.... that is a call for those who are exchanging body fluids.... NOT judgemntal people on the internet who are not part of the relationship.

Poly is a short hand for polyamorus, I did not nitpick a meaning out of context and make a slangerous accusation toward anyone on this thread.

I am not dishonest! I do not cheat!

In my comments back>> because I was quoted, are not chastisement for discussing polyamory in a polyamory thread. IT is chastisement for quoteing me and makeing comment that suggest I am dishonest and deceatful...

>>Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow -- "That's not polyamory and it can be really irritating and tiring when poly threads and conversations are started that this example is thrown into the mix when clearly it's not."<<

"this example" refering to my post, is the statment shows the intent to defame me, and say I am not honest in my actions,

For the record this IS My code of conduct : http://polyamorysociety.org/tools.html

[The_Lady_Snow]

I didn't think anything needed clarification, there wasn't any judgement nor was it personal. I was talking about "my" views on poly relationships. Your poly, my poly, Joe the Plumbers poly will all be different my bad if you're upset over my wording.

[QueenofSmirks]

Originally Posted by boobookitty

I do NOT agree, if there was a lack of clarity, the question of that should have been asked, ... instead a judgemnt of my behavior, by someone who what to look down her nose at me, was posted on an open forum.

I did not say her husband was in the dark!!!!

That was a made up accusation!!!

I wrote, "I like to build relationships, I do not like just screwing around."

I hang out and played pool with her husband, he was fully informed, BEFORE any sexual contact took place... IF a woman is single and does not want her co workers or her mother to know she is gay then she has that right... I respect the terms agreed to between each person I am involved with!

If her rules of relationship with someone else, is such that SHE may be with whom she pleases when she pleases.... that is a call for those who are exchanging body fluids.... NOT judgemntal people on the internet who are not part of the relationship.

Poly is a short hand for polyamorus, I did not nitpick a meaning out of context and make a slangerous accusation toward anyone on this thread.

I am not dishonest! I do not cheat!

In my comments back>> because I was quoted, are not chastisement for discussing polyamory in a polyamory thread. IT is chastisement for quoteing me and makeing comment that suggest I am dishonest and deceatful...

>>Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow -- "That's not polyamory and it can be really irritating and tiring when poly threads and conversations are started that this example is thrown into the mix when clearly it's not."<<

"this example" refering to my post, is the statment shows the intent to defame me, and say I am not honest in my actions,

For the record this IS My code of conduct : http://polyamorysociety.org/tools.html

My statement about the definition of "poly" ...which could be short for polyfidelitous, or polyamorous, or polygamy... was not a slam toward you or an accusation. It was meant to open up the conversation wider than the single term polyamory, but fuck it - I will just sit back and enjoy the show.