Reactions to Embracing Your Femme(ness)

[mariamma]

Originally Posted by cara

I suppose I should talk about the original topic. for the most part, as a femme I feel wholly invisible in the LGBTQ community. I don't like some of the "priviledges" that come with being me. people assume I'm straight. I'm not out to everyone yet because I'm not completely comfortable in my own skin. i've been out to my parents, most friends, and a few acquaintances for years. At work and meeting new people is usually a different story. this year, I have put a rainbow pin on my backpack. at first, it made me really uneasy. now, I really like it because it saves me from perhaps yet another awkward conversation. aside from a little fear when I'm walking home alone at night, I like the subtle message I'm giving to the world: yeah, I'm queer, no I don't "look" like it, and please take a moment to re-examine your views of the world. for the most part, people are very supportive once they know.

I understand. I wore a pink triangle everywhere in college. I once had a (suspected lesbian) ask me what it meant, confused on why a straight-looking woman who always wore skirts would wear a pink triangle. And I wore a button that said "Vagatarian" as well as many political buttons on my coat. I still feel like I have to scream "I'm a dyke" at times in order to be taken seriously. Portia De Rossi, Cynthia Nixon and that cute country singer make it easier though.