1st name basis at work

DapperButch · 08-21-2012, 06:32 PM

Dude, do you ever post in any threads, or just start them?

I am only joking around with you. I think that most of the threads that you have started have been interesting.

I don't think you are going to get many takers on this one, though. I don't know how much discussion could come about on this topic.

stephfromMIT · 08-21-2012, 07:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Dude, do you ever post in any threads, or just start them?

I am only joking around with you. I think that most of the threads that you have started have been interesting.

I don't think you are going to get many takers on this one, though. I don't know how much discussion could come about on this topic.

Glad you're j/k. The reason I start so many is because I like to learn about folks. I made this a separate from my "TA assignment" thread because I thought they didn't work as 1 post (as dumb as that sounds)

Corkey · 08-21-2012, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stephfromMIT

Glad you're j/k. The reason I start so many is because I like to learn about folks. I made this a separate from my "TA assignment" thread because I thought they didn't work as 1 post (as dumb as that sounds)

What I do is read folks posts, gives me a clue as to who they are. I'm differently abled and therefore have massive amounts of time to devote to reading, which I do every day. Start posting in some of the fluffy threads and you'll find out quite a bit about people.

some of us have been around for years, some are newbies like yerself. We all start somewhere

spritzerJ · 08-21-2012, 07:24 PM

I teach in an elementary school. Amongst our teacher selves we go by first names. Usually I learn the last names first since I am often addressing others in front of students. But elementary school is a weird world... Mrs. Lines I notice your class is so quiet in the hall...

aishah · 08-21-2012, 08:41 PM

when i was in college i addressed professors by their title and tas by their first name (mostly because we were in a lot of classes together as students). when i was in grad school i addressed everyone by their first name, though it took me some time to adjust. in every other job i've always addressed bosses and coworkers by their first name.

nowadays i work for myself and i address just about everyone by their first name. i'm a pretty informal person and i prefer to relate to people on a human level, without a lot of power plays, so i don't like it when people address me by titles either.

i mean, i'm a southerner at heart and i ma'am and sir most folks older than me, but i can't think of any situations offhand now where i address people by titles anymore...i'm on a first name basis even with most of my doctors now. i grew up addressing people by their titles and it took several years of being in situations where it was normal to address everyone by their first name for me to start being okay with it. especially at church and places like that.

stephfromMIT · 08-21-2012, 09:57 PM

aisha-Calling profs by their 1st name is something I never got used to. I also never quit lost the habit of raising my hand.

P.S.- thanks for the point about calling TAs by 1st names. I wondered how to direct my charges.

Martina · 08-21-2012, 10:22 PM

I would say that I called about half of my profs "Professor Whatever" and half by their first names.

I am currently a public school teacher. I address my colleagues as Mr. and Ms. in front of the kids, which is most of the time. It takes me a while to learn the first names of teachers I don't see often.

Where I was in grad school, professors were addressed as "Professor." Using "Doctor" was pretentious. No one did it although I know of schools where it's common.

So when administrators with Ph.D's go by Doctor, it makes me a little nauseous. But then administrators make me a little nauseous.

ruffryder · 08-21-2012, 10:23 PM

I would address professors as "Professor" and whatever their name was unless they asked to be called by their first name and sometimes that is the case. As for my work colleagues I call them by their first names. Since I work at a upscale 4 star hotel people like to use Sir, Ma'am, Miss, Mr alot and we get a lot of the management doing this with their subordinates. Personally I hate it and ask people to just call me by my name and I will not address someone as Sir, Ma'am, Mr, Miss unless I am sure that is what they want. I have also addressed people by their last name. great thread!

Sparkle · 08-21-2012, 07:08 PM

Well my reply is a slight digression, but I think perhaps it within the context of the OPs question...

90% of the time I refer to my colleagues by their first name, even supervisors, however, there are exceptions.

When I am meeting with donors and discussing the university to which they are an alma mater of, I will always address the head of school as "Chancellor soandso" or "President soandso" or "Dean soandso".

They may have been John and Bill and Lee to me, but in a professional capacity when discussing the upper echelon of university administration in the formal context of philanthropy, I use their titles. It legitimizes the leadership with the donor and it creates a sense of cache between the donor (alum) and the leadership.

But on a one-on-one working basis, I almost always address someone by their first name.

When I worked abroad, however, I was given a crash course in titles, particularly the importance of ceremonial titles...

I learned to address people as:

The Right Worshipful, The Lord Mayor of Lambeth
The Very Reverend, The Dean of Christ Church

as examples. It usually made me laugh to address a letter or email such, but it was expected in formal correspondence.

Once, by accident, while formatting a letter to be sent to all of my donors (alumni of Christ Church College, Oxford), I slipped up and never caught an important edit between the mail merge autofill salutation and my drafted salutation -- I ended up sending over 500 letters to the upper echelon of alumni addressed with a double salutation of "Dear Dear":

"Dear Dear Sir John"
"Dear Dear the Worshipful the Mayor of xxx"
"Dear Dear Mr Cromwell"
"Dear Dear Sir William" etc...........

Ironically, I raised more money from that appeal than any other letter campaign in my time at that company, and I had copious notes from the gentlemen saying how gracious and lovely I was. (because they perceived my double salutation "dear dear" as the height of obsequiousness).

Titles are a funny thing.

08-21-2012, 06:32 PM	#1
DapperButch Roadster Guy How Do You Identify?: FTM, Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: He Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Northeast Posts: 7,745 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 26,545 Thanked 26,809 Times in 5,771 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Dude, do you ever post in any threads, or just start them? I am only joking around with you. I think that most of the threads that you have started have been interesting. I don't think you are going to get many takers on this one, though. I don't know how much discussion could come about on this topic. __________________ -Dapper Are you educated or indoctrinated?

08-21-2012, 07:08 PM	#9
Sparkle Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, please Relationship Status: Loved Up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Western MA Posts: 2,183 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,001 Thanked 6,553 Times in 1,552 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Well my reply is a slight digression, but I think perhaps it within the context of the OPs question... 90% of the time I refer to my colleagues by their first name, even supervisors, however, there are exceptions. When I am meeting with donors and discussing the university to which they are an alma mater of, I will always address the head of school as "Chancellor soandso" or "President soandso" or "Dean soandso". They may have been John and Bill and Lee to me, but in a professional capacity when discussing the upper echelon of university administration in the formal context of philanthropy, I use their titles. It legitimizes the leadership with the donor and it creates a sense of cache between the donor (alum) and the leadership. But on a one-on-one working basis, I almost always address someone by their first name. When I worked abroad, however, I was given a crash course in titles, particularly the importance of ceremonial titles... I learned to address people as: The Right Worshipful, The Lord Mayor of Lambeth The Very Reverend, The Dean of Christ Church as examples. It usually made me laugh to address a letter or email such, but it was expected in formal correspondence. Once, by accident, while formatting a letter to be sent to all of my donors (alumni of Christ Church College, Oxford), I slipped up and never caught an important edit between the mail merge autofill salutation and my drafted salutation -- I ended up sending over 500 letters to the upper echelon of alumni addressed with a double salutation of "Dear Dear": "Dear Dear Sir John" "Dear Dear the Worshipful the Mayor of xxx" "Dear Dear Mr Cromwell" "Dear Dear Sir William" etc........... Ironically, I raised more money from that appeal than any other letter campaign in my time at that company, and I had copious notes from the gentlemen saying how gracious and lovely I was. (because they perceived my double salutation "dear dear" as the height of obsequiousness). Titles are a funny thing. __________________ I am made of stars

08-21-2012, 07:24 PM	#4
spritzerJ Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: Queer (gender), female (biological marker) Preferred Pronoun?: she will work as a default. Relationship Status: engaged to jac until 8/10/14 Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Maine Posts: 3,154 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,307 Thanked 15,802 Times in 2,905 Posts Rep Power: 0	I teach in an elementary school. Amongst our teacher selves we go by first names. Usually I learn the last names first since I am often addressing others in front of students. But elementary school is a weird world... Mrs. Lines I notice your class is so quiet in the hall...

08-21-2012, 08:41 PM	#5
aishah Member How Do You Identify?: queer stone femme shark baby girl Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, little one Relationship Status: dating myself. Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: dallas, tx Posts: 1,495 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,823 Thanked 6,440 Times in 1,288 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	when i was in college i addressed professors by their title and tas by their first name (mostly because we were in a lot of classes together as students). when i was in grad school i addressed everyone by their first name, though it took me some time to adjust. in every other job i've always addressed bosses and coworkers by their first name. nowadays i work for myself and i address just about everyone by their first name. i'm a pretty informal person and i prefer to relate to people on a human level, without a lot of power plays, so i don't like it when people address me by titles either. i mean, i'm a southerner at heart and i ma'am and sir most folks older than me, but i can't think of any situations offhand now where i address people by titles anymore...i'm on a first name basis even with most of my doctors now. i grew up addressing people by their titles and it took several years of being in situations where it was normal to address everyone by their first name for me to start being okay with it. especially at church and places like that.

08-21-2012, 09:57 PM	#6
stephfromMIT Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Troll Preferred Pronoun?: she her Relationship Status: engaged to my fiancee Amanda Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: cambridge MA Posts: 230 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 703 Thanked 408 Times in 143 Posts Rep Power: 0	aisha-Calling profs by their 1st name is something I never got used to. I also never quit lost the habit of raising my hand. P.S.- thanks for the point about calling TAs by 1st names. I wondered how to direct my charges.

08-21-2012, 10:22 PM	#7
Martina Senior Member How Do You Identify?: * Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: * Posts: 4,999 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,409 Thanked 18,283 Times in 4,166 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I would say that I called about half of my profs "Professor Whatever" and half by their first names. I am currently a public school teacher. I address my colleagues as Mr. and Ms. in front of the kids, which is most of the time. It takes me a while to learn the first names of teachers I don't see often. Where I was in grad school, professors were addressed as "Professor." Using "Doctor" was pretentious. No one did it although I know of schools where it's common. So when administrators with Ph.D's go by Doctor, it makes me a little nauseous. But then administrators make me a little nauseous.

08-21-2012, 10:23 PM	#8
ruffryder Senior Member How Do You Identify?: FTM Preferred Pronoun?: guy ones Relationship Status: ... Join Date: May 2011 Location: chillin' in FL Posts: 3,690 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,951 Thanked 9,679 Times in 2,875 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I would address professors as "Professor" and whatever their name was unless they asked to be called by their first name and sometimes that is the case. As for my work colleagues I call them by their first names. Since I work at a upscale 4 star hotel people like to use Sir, Ma'am, Miss, Mr alot and we get a lot of the management doing this with their subordinates. Personally I hate it and ask people to just call me by my name and I will not address someone as Sir, Ma'am, Mr, Miss unless I am sure that is what they want. I have also addressed people by their last name. great thread!