Spouses/Partners of Transmen and transwomen...

[Beloved]

Originally Posted by Mrs Arcstriker

I know I am not the only wife of a transgendered husband, and I am sure there are other transgendered couples here in the world that started out as lesbian identified...

To my transgender-loving couples, how do you fit in?

Interesting topic. I am in a relationship with a transman (a relatively new relationship, we started talking in June). I have an ex that transitioned after we split but this whole thing is new to me.

The man I am dating was never butch. In fact, he was never really even queer except for a couple of months early in the transition. He thought he was a gay man because he was attracted to men before he transitioned (and he lived as a very feminine female). His orientation changed while taking T. From what I have heard this is sort of common in either direction.

Basically he went from being a heterosexual female to being a heterosexual male, with the exception of a few months.

Where do we fit in? Fuck if I know. I know I am queer. He feels that by just being trans there is something queer about that as well. I guess I don't really think about where we fit in very much except when I come to this site. We have our friends that we have had since before we got together and none of them seem to care and just want both of us to be happy. It doesn't bother either of us if people think we are a heterosexual couple, and I think to him we are but maybe with a bit of a twist. I don't get too concerned how other people perceive my relationship. All I know is it's making me extremely happy.