Neurodiversity

[Fanbutch]

Hello Just popping in to see if anyone was about.

[Ursy]

Hello
It's been awhile. I hope all is well with everyone.

[girl_dee]

Originally Posted by Ursy

Hello
It's been awhile. I hope all is well with everyone.

i Ursy, nice to see you again

[Ursy]

Originally Posted by girl_dee

i Ursy, nice to see you again

Thank you hon, it's nice to be back

[Bit]

*peeks in to see what Urs is up to* Hi hon! Got nothing to say, just following you around.

[Girl_On_Fire]

Hello everyone. I can't believe I missed this thread! Wait, yes I can. I always miss the obvious. lol!

I'm a self-diagnosed aspie since 2007. I stumbled upon the disorder from a combination of the way others reacted to me and Googling, "Why do I take everything literally?" one day out of sheer frustration.

Since then, it's been an amazing journey. Finding out I have Asperger's syndrome helped put the puzzle pieces of my life together. I don't have an official diagnosis and have not yet sought one. I'm a woman in my early 30s and from the research I've done, it seems it is very difficult to diagnose women older than 25 because of our unique ability to "parrot" appropriate social responses by watching and memorizing.

My symptoms:

• I take what is said to me literally
• I have a shuddering aversion to certain sounds/textures
• I have no sense of direction
• I get sensory overload so bad driving on highways I start to black out
• I don't read non-verbal cues well
• I am empathic/highly sensitive
• I can't stand change in my routine
• Others often misunderstand the intentions of my words/deeds
• I need lots of time to myself
• I have muscle twitches and tics
• I flap, stretch, and squeak (stims, I guess)

This isn't to say I can't function at all. I actually do quite well and have been doing well since I realized that I truly was wired differently. In 2008, I did a series of homeopathic remedies called "Brain Protocol" to treat another medical condition I'd struggled with for years. My homeopathic doctor believed I had developmental issues based on the medical condition I was experiencing because nothing else would treat it. However, I had no idea that this was also used and successfully to treat people on the autistic spectrum.

After the treatment, I found new connections had been turned "on" in my brain. Not only was the chronic medical condition clearing up (finally) but my brain was working differently. I was able to see "obvious" things that had never been obvious before. I was also able to successfully drive to a park and go hiking without getting lost (okay, I got lost in the woods once I got there but I found my way out). So this was amazing for me. I didn't venture out of the house much because of my complete lack of direction. I never could have hiked even well-blazed trails with a map because maps used to mean nothing to me.

So, the brain protocol helped but yes, I'm still an Aspie.

When I was a child, people terrified me. It seemed I was always being pulled out of my beautiful, safe imaginary world to be yelled at and told I was being rude of doing something wrong. I spent many years hysterically hyperventilating and explaining myself profusely when there would be misunderstandings between myself and my family. I'd swear to God I "didn't do it" when, in reality, perhaps I did but just didn't view the situation the same way and had more innocent intentions.

Being an Aspie can make communication very difficult. After nearly 3 years of being in a relationship with somebody with a severe mental illness, the two proved impossible to meld together. We loved each other but we were ultimately incompatible. I understand on all levels what it's like to have Asperger's and have certain people understand and others look at you like you just walked off the Mother ship. I've just been trying to tell myself not everybody needs to understand me and if they don't, it's best I walk away. I'm extremely emotionally sensitive and susceptible to being abused and mistreated, not because I'm a victim but because I take everything so literally and have trouble accurately interpreting the intentions of others. Also, some people, it seems especially those who've been deeply traumatized themselves, mistake my social ignorance for purposeful cruel intent, which is the exact antithesis of who I am. I can't be in any type of relationship where I have to explain myself, sometimes hysterically, for months and even years. There has to be a cut-off point where it's like, "Okay, if you don't believe me, I am not safe with you and must move on."

I've learned trusting my God-given empathic abilities is my best bet in avoiding future emotional devastation. Though I cannot read social cues well, I am usually spot on with what I sense energetically from another.

Thank you for this thread!

I hope we can keep the dialogue going.

[Bit]

Hi, Girl on Fire, welcome! I'm glad you've found ways to understand yourself.

Congrats on the hike, and getting yourself unlost! My sense of direction is so bad. I'm never sure I can get unlost... I have gotten lost before just walking from work to home when it was only four blocks and I had done it for a year already!! So I'm pretty impressed that you got unlost in the woods.

I can read maps just fine, but I never seem to get them pointed in the right direction. "North" seems to default to wherever I'm facing at the moment; I tell people I'm directionally dyslexic. My first partner used to laugh and say that I'm just "upside down and going in the opposite direction in a parallel universe." She doesn't seem to have been far wrong. *wry laugh*